Return Styles: Pseud0ch, Terminal, Valhalla, NES, Geocities, Blue Moon. Entire thread

Neurotypical idiots

Name: Anonymous 2015-04-20 2:39

I fucking hate all of you for making me waste my time.

After graduating from university, I still was a virgin. Some of my ex-classmates I was kinda close with kept bugging me about my "distant, cold and aloof personality". They don't understand it's plain boring to spend your time with people who are majoring on computer engineering, yet still don't know how to install a Linux distro or make a basic IRC client in C. Because of this, interaction between us consisted of calling me whenever they wanted to play a multiplayer game or had a problem with their pirated software running on shitty hardware. Telling them outright to fuck off wasn't a good idea because university forces you to do group homework and making enemies is never a good idea, no matter where you are.

Now for the relevant part. Since we all grew out of university and went on with our lives, many of them followed the usual trend of getting a job, buying a car, finding a girlfriend and becoming utterly bitter faggots. One of my ex-classmates called me, said he's wondering how I've been doing and invited me over to his place. Trying not to be an asshole, I accepted his invitation and had a long conversation while we were having lunch. The lunch his girlfriend had prepared for all three of us.

Him: "How's life going for you?"
Me: "Got a job for a small company that works with embedded devices. Been writing some simple drivers and helping them with their Linux servers and stuff because they don't have any sysadmins yet. What about you?"
H: "Found a job at a company that makes software for other bigger companies. It's been pretty hard on me but I'm doing this for the both of us."
(starts staring at his girlfriend, she giggles and they kiss)
H: "I suppose you already found someone to give meaning to your life."
(first thought that comes to my head is that of my favorite Touhou, then I realize how gay he sounds)
M: "No, you know I'm not the kind of person to spend my time with others."
H: "Awww! Come on, aren't you a bit too old for that?"
(girlfriend agrees with a quick nod and a "Yeah, yeah")
H: I bet you still live alon- don't tell me you are still single!"
M: "Well, yeah. Time and money are virtually unlimited, there's nothing to complain about this lifestyle."
(girlfriend looks mildly offended)
H: "You wouldn't understand! You've never had someone to share your days with."
(Is that my fault? I consider myself an unintelligent dumbfuck and finding people who are mildly interesting is pretty fucking hard. Also, what kind of brainwashing have you been through? What's with those awfully cheesy sayings?)
M: "Of course not, I'm considerate enough not to bore other people to death with my endless ramblings about computers."
H: "Haha, don't say that, I'm pretty sure there's someone out there for you."
M: "I'm not trying to be mean, but I'm real fucking sick of that line. How many times have I told you I don't find permanent company enjoyable? Living alone and having all the time I want for myself is what I've always wanted ever since I was very young and I'm not giving it up after I've come this far."
H: "You're saying that because you're feeling lonely. Don't worry, it's not that uncommon to rationalize your situation, especially at your age. Believe me, you wouldn't want to go back to being single after you find someone you genuinely enjoy spending your time with."

Trying not to start a pointless argument at someone else's place, I laugh it off and propose we play something after we're done having lunch, on the excuse that "it's not that uncommon to become a little faggot at games, especially after you find a girlfriend". I was expecting his girlfriend to get mad and him to laugh, but instead they both laughed like monkeys. After finishing our lunch, I gave his girlfriend a honest compliment for her cooking skills, thanked both of them for the meal and went straight for his PS3. I spotted a brand new copy of some Call of Duty game,

M: "What about this one? Seems like neither of us have played this game before and it'd be nice to see if it really is catered for 12 year olds."
H: "Haha, yeah, I wouldn't play that game by myself, I bought it hoping I could play it with someone else."
M: "You haven't even peeled off the cover. Have you not played this with her?"
(you can read "shit, I totally forgot about her" on his face)
H: "Uh, she doesn't like that kind of games. (...) How about Little Big Planet?"
M: "Uh... okay."
("yay" in the background)

Thinking it would be a boring game for children, I was surprised after having some legitimate fun with it, though it's not my favorite kind of game and I was progressively getting bored. Seems like he was getting bored of it too, though his girlfriend was still brimming with enthusiasm. Which is funny because she was pretty bad at the game.

-- cont
Like this blogpost? Share on Reddit Share on Twitter Share on Facebook

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-21 1:39

rosemary parsley and thyme

Name: a fan of dubs 2015-08-21 3:08

I, a fan of dubs, salute >>644.

Name: a hater of dubs 2015-08-21 3:29

I, a hater of dubs, curse >>644

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-21 4:10

JEWS

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-21 8:32

sage

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-21 10:08

sage

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-21 12:43

saging

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-21 20:22

saging

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-22 3:56

sage

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-22 11:44

all these sage's
Bumpcucks btfo tbh. full kek

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-22 19:39

all these sage's
Bumpcucks btfo tbh. full kek

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-22 21:45

noko

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-23 1:01

sage'd

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-23 17:34

sage'd

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 0:21

sage for great justice

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 1:44

sage for great justice

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 4:12

>>655
Nice dubs! Sage!

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 10:47

Hatate: "Ever heard of seasoning?"
Me: "Of course. I never add any additional flavors because I only care about being satisfied."
This is probably the most embarrassing part of the whole story.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 13:08

>>658
forgot your sage m8

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 15:02

>>658
Reminds me of this:
http://i.imgur.com/pCTnXVL.gif

Though I partially agree with him. Sometimes flavor is given too much importance while nutrition and proper serving sizes are forgotten. This is true of most third-world cultures.

OP must be a currynigger.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 19:11

I want to thank sage-kun. Had it not been for him, I wouldn't have read this thread. I'm enjoying it so far.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-24 23:58

>>655
Nice dubs! Sage!

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 0:51

>>658
forgot your sage m8

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 4:46

>>661
I wouldn't have read this thread. I'm enjoying it so far
OP, if you're going to lie at least make it believable. This thread is shit and you are shit.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 9:20

>>666
Nice trips, satan.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 12:22

satanic trips GET

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 12:29

>>666
Excellent trips, satan.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 14:07

>>664
Holy fuck, are you the counterculture retard who won't shut the fuck up about how bad anime is? Why do you think we give a shit about your opinion?

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 14:26

sage

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 15:30

>>664
I'm not OP and I'm not lying, this thread is one of the most enjoyable in /lounge/ for me. This might surprise you, but different people have different tastes.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 16:04

>>670
I'm sorry, but you are not allowed to enjoy this thread.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-25 22:23

sage

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-26 19:58

Finished reading this thread. If OP was aiming for a /jp/ fanfiction, the ending was lackluster. The rest was pretty amusing nevertheless. In some parts I felt like I was reading a story of my life.

Hey OP, are you still here? I'd like to ask you some questions.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-27 4:33

>>670
I'm sorry, but you're simply to dumb to have read this thread correctly. Therefore, your "opinion" means, oh I don't know, Jack Shit.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-27 13:44

>>674
Are you an aspiring progrider quality officer? You're doing good, the only thing left is to start sucking Admin's dick. Keep at it, I know you can do it!

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-27 14:37

>>672
I'm on to you.

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-28 17:53

>>664,669,674,676
You must be at least 18 to post on this site!

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-28 23:27

You must at least sage to post in this thread!

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-29 1:39

You must at least sage to post in this thread!

Name: Anonymous 2015-08-29 4:03

just have sex jesus christ

Newer Posts