[Req For Comments] Considering a Fanny Pack

So I'm thinking of getting a fanny pack to store my huge phone and myriad items that won't fit in my pocket. Wondering if you think the obvious benefits outweigh the likely shaming that comes with it.

So you want a faggy pack to store your faggy phablet?

huge phone

Are you a nigger, a dumb blonde or both?

Either
A.Get a backpack
B.Get rid of non-essential items
C.Get suit with moar pockets.

>>3
I like to read ebooks and surf the web when I'm outside. Can't do that as easily on a small screen.

>>4

A.Get a backpack

That's overkill. You can't take a backpack absolutely everywhere like you can a fanny pack. Plus I have PTSD from wearing a backpack in high school.

B.Get rid of non-essential items

So I have to choose a non-essential item between my keys, car keys, phablet, wallet, wallet #2 (diversion for mugging scenarios (only has $20, empty gift cards, and a GPS tracker)), coins, concealed carry, bluetooth headset, breath freshener, baggie of emergency aspirin in case of a stroke, hand sanitizer gel, and a handkerchief. Nope.

C.Get suit with moar pockets.

If you wear a suit everyday you're either a poor scrub (used car salesman, enterprise quality manager, or trial lawyer) or a Forbes-listed executive with a country club membership. Guess how I know which one you are.

>>5
You're just jealous that you don't have a membership in Used Enterprise Lambda Salesmen Quality Country Club for Trial Lawyers.

Anyone who says our types "phablet" needs to be killed. Seriously >>1-chan, consider suicide.

>>2 was the one who said phablet, not >>1

>>8
Wrong asshole! They are one and the same.

>>8
Wow that's totally wrong wtf.... >>5 was the one who introduced the term "phablet" to this conversation on /lounge/.

>>10
>>5's post included the word phablet, but so did >>2, which was obviously posted earlier. Don't believe me? Here's a transcript of >>2's post:

So you want a faggy pack to store your faggy phablet?

>>9
If your assholes are the same, how can you claim that one of them is wrong?

>>5
There was this time when a breath freshener saved my life.

Said no one ever.

>>5
I read ebooks and surf the web on a 5" screen. Have you ever considered not being a raging faggot?

>>14

A phablet is a computing device with a screen size between four-and-a-half and seven inches

Who am I quoting? http://whatis.techtarget.com/definition/phablet

Huge phones go well with fanny packs.

>>15
Whom are you quoting?

Lifehack: Don't want to get mocked for wearing a fanny pack? Just carry a hammer with you! When you break people's skulls when they mock you, they can't complain for much longer!

Eventually everyone will know not to mock you for your fanny pack!

>>18
That's a reactive, not preventative measure. Bashing heads after you have been mocked doesn't male you unmocked. Much like the only way to stop rape is for women to stop dressing and acting like sluts, the only way to stop from being mocked for having a fanny pack is to stop wearing a fanny pack.

Much like the only way to stop rape is for women to stop dressing and acting like sluts

That's not guaranteed to work though, rape is any unconsensual sex, and some people are desperate enough that they'll rape a non-slutty woman (not to mention that women being slutty or not has basically zero effect on men being raped). Likewise, not wearing a fanny pack won't protect you from being mocked, you just won't be mocked for wearing a fanny pack. In both cases, the hammer is a good idea, you just have to use it on potential mockers/rapists before they have a chance to mock/rape you.

What you need then is a hammer with a built-in predictive brain scanner.

scan these fucking dubs