>>9I'm talking about speed and reliability.
My 7-year-old Toshiba laptop is physically falling apart, the ribbon cable through the hinge is dying, the touchpad is confused, the fingerprint reader has not worked for years, the keyboard is flaky, it's constantly blasting heat, and of course it's god-awful slow. It's not completely dead, which I guess is something, but it's unusable. Similar tale to any other laptop around here that's not brand new.
Desktops do their thing and do it well, are cheap, have longevity through upgrades, and don't fall apart with use. With modern internet speeds, ssh, VNC, and remote X11 put them into whatever portable disposable form factor you want.
And my Commodore 64s still work fine at 30+ years old.