The FP goblin

We all know that one person. He will claim that functional programming is the answer to any problem. When tried to be convinced that he is wrong, he will screech. He will most often push towards using an obsolete toy language like lisp or haskell.

Me: i have this jave problem how do i do it
Goblin: i would suggest haskell its one line with nomads
Me: but i am maintaining a large system written in java
Goblin: haskel