I invented a dish I like to call "L'carné servi au broyé", which I suspect to mean "meat served ground", if my knowledge of the most useless language on earth hasn't decayed since high school. It's made by putting ground beef in a pot, putting in some fresh garlic, onions, mushrooms, pepper, salt, and french onion soup mix in it. Turn the stove to the hottest setting, and put the pan on it. Keep stirring until the meat is completely cooked and you should have hundreds of little chunks of meat left over. There should be a bit of grease, so drain that into a pot an set aside for now. Fill the grease pot up with water, about half way that is, not to the rim unless you like getting burned. Put it on the stove and wait until it starts to boil. When it's boiling, dump in some long noodles, keep stirring. Periodically get a fork and fish out a noodle. Taste it to see if it's done. When it is, take the pot off the stove and strain the pasta out with a colander or sieve. I don't know what the difference is honestly, so either will work. Next, get out some tomatoes, as many as you like. Use a tenderizing hammer to pound those niggers like they stole your bike. When they are significantly pulverized, put them in a sauce pot, or a regular pot will do I suppose, add a little water, some basil, garlic, thyme, oregano, and parsley. If you want to put semen in the dish, then this is the time to add it. Heat it up and let it simmer for a while. Five minutes isn't enough, but an hour is too long, so you'll have to stand there and stir it. When that's done, pour it into the pan you cooked the meat in. Since that is now cold, put it on the stove again and heat it up. Put some of your noodles on a plate and serve with the meat and sauce on top. Enjoy!