The programming mindset

How can I know if I'm too stupid for programming/engineering/maths?

Is it true you need a good memory and be good at just swallowing lots of apparently random technical stuff?

For example BSD sockets. To "learn" them I guess you just have to memorize all these syscalls, the whole connection model. What does it even mean in a deeper sense? I don't know.

At one point you just have to have faith and be good at remembering lots of formulas, how do you do that

Also I'm worried that if I spend the rest of my life remembering random random shit like "public static void" I will turn into robot. How is confidence even possible, how do you build confidence, reality is constant chaos and randomness, how can you claim to have any control over any of it if not through self-deception, are confident people confident because they constantly please people by being normal?