hax my anus!!!!!

I like to troll tinychan's /prog/ramming board by posting useless code. One of my favorites is a program called "HMA.py" that simply outputs "HAX MY ANUS!!!!" (One of the lesser known internet memes) no matter what. Instead of using the simpler print "HAX MY ANUS!!!" command I use random integers and if and else statements to create a useless program.

So here is hax my anus in various languages.

Code: Python

#!/usr/bin/python
from random import randint
anus = randint(1, 1000)

if (anus < 500):
print "HAX MY ANUS!!"
else:
print "HAX MY ANUS!!"


Code: PHP

<?php
$hax = rand(1, 1000);
if ($hax < 500) {
print "HAX MY ANUS!!";
} else {
print "HAX MY ANUS!!";
};


Code: LUA

#!/bin/lua
hax = math.random(1,1000);
if hax < 500 then
print("HAX MY ANUS!");
else
print("HAX MY ANUS!");
end


Code: CGI/Perl

#!/usr/bin/perl
use strict;
use warnings;
my $range = 1000;
my $PINGAS = rand($range);
if ($PINGAS < 500) {
print "HAX MY ANUS!!!!!";
} else {
print "HAX MY ANUS!!!!!";
};

HAX MY ANUS!!!!!!!!!!!

cudder tier

section.data
msg db "HAX MY ANUS", 0xA, 0xD

section.text
global _start

_start:
rdtsc ;prng lmao
xor edx, eax

cmp edx, 0x3FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
jne hma2

hma1:
mov eax,4
mov ebx,1
mov ecx,msg
mov edx,13
int 0x80
jmp end

hma2:
mov eax,4
mov ebx,1
mov ecx,msg
mov edx,13
int 0x80

end:
mov eax,1
int 0x80