I fucking hate all of you for making me waste my time.
After graduating from university, I still was a virgin. Some of my ex-classmates I was kinda close with kept bugging me about my "distant, cold and aloof personality". They don't understand it's plain boring to spend your time with people who are majoring on computer engineering, yet still don't know how to install a Linux distro or make a basic IRC client in C. Because of this, interaction between us consisted of calling me whenever they wanted to play a multiplayer game or had a problem with their pirated software running on shitty hardware. Telling them outright to fuck off wasn't a good idea because university forces you to do group homework and making enemies is never a good idea, no matter where you are.
Now for the relevant part. Since we all grew out of university and went on with our lives, many of them followed the usual trend of getting a job, buying a car, finding a girlfriend and becoming utterly bitter faggots. One of my ex-classmates called me, said he's wondering how I've been doing and invited me over to his place. Trying not to be an asshole, I accepted his invitation and had a long conversation while we were having lunch. The lunch his girlfriend had prepared for all three of us.
Him: "How's life going for you?" Me: "Got a job for a small company that works with embedded devices. Been writing some simple drivers and helping them with their Linux servers and stuff because they don't have any sysadmins yet. What about you?" H: "Found a job at a company that makes software for other bigger companies. It's been pretty hard on me but I'm doing this for the both of us." (starts staring at his girlfriend, she giggles and they kiss) H: "I suppose you already found someone to give meaning to your life." (first thought that comes to my head is that of my favorite Touhou, then I realize how gay he sounds) M: "No, you know I'm not the kind of person to spend my time with others." H: "Awww! Come on, aren't you a bit too old for that?" (girlfriend agrees with a quick nod and a "Yeah, yeah") H: I bet you still live alon- don't tell me you are still single!" M: "Well, yeah. Time and money are virtually unlimited, there's nothing to complain about this lifestyle." (girlfriend looks mildly offended) H: "You wouldn't understand! You've never had someone to share your days with." (Is that my fault? I consider myself an unintelligent dumbfuck and finding people who are mildly interesting is pretty fucking hard. Also, what kind of brainwashing have you been through? What's with those awfully cheesy sayings?) M: "Of course not, I'm considerate enough not to bore other people to death with my endless ramblings about computers." H: "Haha, don't say that, I'm pretty sure there's someone out there for you." M: "I'm not trying to be mean, but I'm real fucking sick of that line. How many times have I told you I don't find permanent company enjoyable? Living alone and having all the time I want for myself is what I've always wanted ever since I was very young and I'm not giving it up after I've come this far." H: "You're saying that because you're feeling lonely. Don't worry, it's not that uncommon to rationalize your situation, especially at your age. Believe me, you wouldn't want to go back to being single after you find someone you genuinely enjoy spending your time with."
Trying not to start a pointless argument at someone else's place, I laugh it off and propose we play something after we're done having lunch, on the excuse that "it's not that uncommon to become a little faggot at games, especially after you find a girlfriend". I was expecting his girlfriend to get mad and him to laugh, but instead they both laughed like monkeys. After finishing our lunch, I gave his girlfriend a honest compliment for her cooking skills, thanked both of them for the meal and went straight for his PS3. I spotted a brand new copy of some Call of Duty game,
M: "What about this one? Seems like neither of us have played this game before and it'd be nice to see if it really is catered for 12 year olds." H: "Haha, yeah, I wouldn't play that game by myself, I bought it hoping I could play it with someone else." M: "You haven't even peeled off the cover. Have you not played this with her?" (you can read "shit, I totally forgot about her" on his face) H: "Uh, she doesn't like that kind of games. (...) How about Little Big Planet?" M: "Uh... okay." ("yay" in the background)
Thinking it would be a boring game for children, I was surprised after having some legitimate fun with it, though it's not my favorite kind of game and I was progressively getting bored. Seems like he was getting bored of it too, though his girlfriend was still brimming with enthusiasm. Which is funny because she was pretty bad at the game.
-- cont Like this blogpost? Share on Reddit Share on Twitter Share on Facebook
I wish RedCream would make a thread like this, detailing his daily life. I'd read the shit out of it, unlike this horrifying garbage I've read but a few words of.
Look, I'm not a social-media poster despite my involvement in /lounge/ boards. I don't sit around all day playing at being a wordsmith as a lifestyle. I have a life already. I don't do Twitter or Facebook or Bleeper or Whateverboopy. They all strike me as an enormous waste of time... and I don't want to hear how ironic that is considering my involvement on the /lounge/ boards. We all have our heroin... /lounge/ boards are mine. But that's as far as it goes.
Capiche? Now I'll go back to /lounge/ shitposting as my RedCream persona.
Highway-kun, one seldom sees such a maximal state of BBCOAD FAYL.
Well done in yoar FAILSTATE.
Name:
Anonymous2015-05-04 20:59
>>309 Don't laugh at him (and don't quote what hasn't been said either).
I feel for OP, this is what the Jews have done to us. A woman can now coerce you into having sex with you, accuse you of rape, force you to pay lifelong support for the implied ``PTSD'' and get away with it. Every man is a rapist until proven innocent.
Thanks, Jews! Thanks, feminists!
Name:
This too shall pass2015-05-04 23:28
>>392 I've never been called a jew before. Should I be flattered? After all, in your /pol/ soaked eyes, I'm an all powerful demon god who controls every aspect of your life from the shadows.
I know what its like to be angry. Life is miserable enough without fucking yourself up more with anger. It will all end eventually anyway. You were born as a member of a broken species. There is no fixing it. Just do more programming.
You (or I) might say this, but nobody else would. This is something you would do. This is something people outside /prog/ would never do. she analyzed its behaviour in a way that is detailed in a way only you could appreciate
I sorry if I skipped the details to make this believable. She's programmed videogames enough to give a talk in a government-funded event, one that's known to be absurdly strict with their standards of what's considered worthy of being presented to hundreds of enterprise faggots. She's the owner of an indie game studio she created herself about 5 years ago, after she had success in the local market making "app-like" games. She was a lone programmer before founding the studio and hiring graphic designers, artists and programmers.
Now that you know this, what in the godliving hell do you think the speaker of a videogame conference, coming from a game studio, would talk about with a total stranger? Dinosaurs?
Have you never had a boss of yours attend an event that's relevant to him with a small group from your company? They don't go there just to drink beer, they go there to meet potential customers and STRATEGIC PARTNERS, get new ideas for incoming projects, get up-to-date with the latest INNOVATIONS in the industry and even to discreetly spy on other companies. I still don't know why you think this is bullshit when there are other bullshit-sounding parts of my story like the blonde rape (which I still don't believe myself).
The behaviour of the other women (Hatate and Alice) is highly implausible too. Those other women, like this one, match your hobbies,
Of course, I didn't meet them on a fucking bus stop or at some epic rave like some others do. I've been to specific places that are visited by people with specific interests. Did you really expect me to meet a neurosurgeon at the weeb convention? Or a supermodel at the developer convention?
your temperament and your desires perfectly at the point in time they appear in your life.
Totally explains why I dated the shit out of the Rubik girl and enjoyed being manipulated by a blond retard to the point of feeling like I was raped, right? Just because I had two happy endings that could be considered successes doesn't mean I'm the luckiest man alive. I haven't even finished the story. I wouldn't be telling you this story if I had magically found a girl who matched all my hobbies, always kept a reasonable temperament and matched my desires as you're saying I did.
A few weeks later she sent me a mail with more details about the game. Most of them were about making it more usable, adding a plot and telling me if I wanted to work with (read: for) her. I avoided talking about such proposal and kept fishing for more advice. She said we could meet up at a cafe near her house to discuss some things.
I accepted. While I was waiting outside, a girl stood in front of me.
Her: "Good afternoon, [REDACTED]."
Who is this? Why does she know my nam- wow.
While we were at that building at the end of the world, she never took off her sunglasses or her beanie. In front of me there was a short girl wearing conservative clothes that looked expensive. She brought a designer and an "engineer" (a programmer) with her. This was much more formal than I thought it would be, it was kind of uncomfortable for me. I could have prepared myself for this.
I learned many things I didn't know about, like a government program that almost threw money at videogame developers that participated in a national videogame making contest. The prospect of getting pretty much lots of free money by using Unity or some other game engine to make a short game seemed interesting, but I couldn't find the motivation to do that when they forced boring topics on them like "a game about recycling" or "a game about good citizenship aimed for children".
Me: "That certainly sounds interesting but I have no experience making that kind of games." Her: "It's okay, most game engines provide out-of-the-box features that speed up the process of learning and production." Engineer: "Do you have any experience using game engines?" Designer: "You'd only have to worry about the game logic." M: "Not at all. That's not what I mean either. I'm saying I don't find the prospect of making games like that very appealing." (everyone at the table made a DOES THIS GUY EVEN FOLLOW ENTERPRISE AGILE METHODOLOGIES grimace) H: "Why is that?" M: "First of all, I'm not a professional game developer. I don't make games with money in mind." (same face, they weren't even trying to hide it) H: "Anyway, we're not here to talk about that. I think we could make some modifications to your game and target it to a specific demographic sector that's more serious than the average." E: "We want to make a console port based on your idea." (fuck no, this isn't meant to be played with a controller) M: "I don't have any experience with console programming-" E: "We know getting a console SDK is almost impossible as an individual. We've got that covered." H: "We'd like you to work with us." M: "Give me some time to work on the design and I'll consider working with you." (This wasn't the exact same thing I said but I remember saying something equally as nonsensical) H: "Fine. Here are the conditions, should you accept our offer."
She handed me a sheet with what could be called an informal contract. Working with them four hours a day, two days a week for six months giving them progress reports, getting good pay and collecting the 50% of the profits of the finished game. A long-winded way of saying "outsourcing". I knew my game wouldn't sell shit because nobody will play anything that's not a shitty boring MOBA like League of Niggers anymore and the two faggots who would play it wouldn't pay a penny for it. I told them it'd be some time before I gave them my final decision and we left the place.
I mailed them a couple of weeks later saying I got a promotion at my current job which would take up most of my time and that I wouldn't be able to work with them under those conditions. I didn't actually get promoted, I didn't want to make a shitty console port of a shitty game only I like and that was my roundabout way of telling them. "In that case, would you like giving us a hand with what we're currently working on? We have flexible schedules". Do I look like cheap workforce that much? Why are they insisting so hard to have me on their team?
After this, I started seeing her as a money-hungry Jew more than a "fellow" game developer. Scare quotes because I can't even call myself a game developer. It happens, you can't live off this unless you are aggressive and PROACTIVE and that's the sad reality of pretty much everything out there.
-- cont
Name:
Anonymous2015-05-05 1:41
>>413 That sequence of events seems way too good to be to be true to a pessimistic broken person such as myself.
It feels foreign, bizarre, otherworldly. I can't process what you are saying. The real world is a horrific hellscape to my eyes, where positive things are merely glitches, anomalies punctuating an otherwise unbroken continuum of horror and misery.
I accepted on the premise that their schedules were actually flexible. Since I don't have hard deadlines at my job and sometimes I'll take the day off and work double the next day, they didn't mind and neither did I.
The game studio was a glass cube with dark roof built in the gigantic backyard of that rich girl. You had to walk through the first floor of her house to get there. She had a huge TV, a huge couch, a huge fireplace and a huge shelf with many alcoholic beverages being exhibited. At the studio, lots of Macs and powerful computers with IPS screens.
The three engineers would work full-time using Unity while the designers would make shitloads of 3D models and other assets. At first I was supposed to help them with the bonus stages for a game about a leaping frog escaping from the sewers but I quickly became their sysadmin and programming counselor. I'd go there on the (late) afternoons after finishing what I had to do at the other job.
I spent my time setting up a firewall, a network-shared folder, learning Unity, making two bonus stages and worrying about how little time I'd have left for the other job. I also became that girl's personal driver. "Please take me to the cafe". "Please take me to the restaurant". I can't say I hate being paid to drive monstrous cars but it's weird because you're being paid for your programming services and this makes you feel used. Driving was fun nonetheless.
Sometimes I'd be left alone with her in the studio. A side of her I wish I didn't get to know was her rampant alcoholism. She'd drink one bottle of anything she had on her shelf every night. On Fridays she would binge drink almost until she fell unconscious. The other guys already knew about it but they ignored it or even encouraged by drinking with her, though not to such extent.
One Friday I had to take her to the stationery store to buy the weekly supplies. I was waiting for her in the car. Nobody else was in the studio. It was getting dark until she finally got in. She was drunk as hell. I drove very carefully to avoid her from throwing up in the car. When we got there, I had to call every single one of the other guys to ask them if anyone knew what we had to buy because she couldn't even remember, but I got an incomplete/incorrect answer from one of them and ended up oversupplying ourselves. It didn't mean the end of the world but it was something we weren't used to. When we got back, she started acting weird.
H: "where are you taking me" M: "To your house, obviously." H: "please take me to my house" M: "Yeah, yeah." H: "don't take me anywhere else" M: "(...)" H: "are you dumping me too" (what) H: "don't dump me"
I'd always carry her to the couch and leave. This episode repeated for other three weeks.
The fourth time, however, she started groping me while I was driving her back to her place. I got really annoyed because that shit is dangerous and she shouldn't be drunk in the first place. I tried carrying her and leaving her on the couch but she was trying to shake herself off my back. After succeeding, she fell on the floor, crawled a little, stood up, supported her weight on the walls and headed for her room. I grabbed her before she climbed up the stairs, put her back on my back and searched all the rooms until I found hers.
I put her on her bed but she wouldn't let go. She was clinging to my neck.
H: "are you dumping me too"
She sloppily kissed me, like trying to suck the air out of me in a clumsy way. She guided my hand to her breasts. I know I should have said this from the beginning, but she's got a pretty decent face (7/10) and a very curvy body on the verge of being fat (4/10). I gently hit her stomach with my elbow trying to break free from her grip but she still wouldn't let go. For a moment I thought this could get fun so I kept kissing her and groping her breasts.
Youmu: "You don't want to keep doing that."
I froze up. An intense feeling of guilt washed over me. I forced her hands off my neck. I got her a glass of water and ran off back to my house.
After that, things were awkward for me at the studio, though she didn't seem to remember what happened, or at least she decided to forget it or thought it wasn't a big deal. She acted normally while we were at the studio, though I really wanted my "contract" to finish soon. My job there was over and I got paid well for doing pretty much nothing. They won that government contest but I don't have a smartphone so I don't know if their game sold well or not.
I think Youmu saved me from stepping on a landmine.
-- cont See you tomorrow. This might seem like a hurried conclusion but there's nothing else to be said. The following posts will be shorter for the same reason. Also, sage sage sage SAGE SAGE SAGE SAGE.
>>417 I don't know if the appers working for her could make a real-time strategy game. The game with the leaping frog had some slightly complicated physics like fluid simulation and air resistance, though it was pretty basic and Unity might have helped them with that.
Either way, they were too busy with that game and the RTS wasn't their main priority. Maybe they wanted to experiment with a side project and I seemed like the proper candidate for that. I still think they were too pushy and must have seen something else in me. Something along the lines of having a permanent overly obedient sheep face or looking like someone who could put up with anyone's shit.
Now the story is getting really interesting. I hope that isn't the end of this chapter. I wonder if she actually thinks you're dating or if that was just drunk talk.
You seem incapable of folloaing the clear English that I poasted outside of my RedCream persona. I must ask you to leave here as if this was a boael and you were merely a boalus or turd, hence metaphoarically speaking the little red X to the upper right of yoar broaser windoa is much like an anus!