Girl Programmers

Good $(date), /prog/! I'm the Symta guy (Nikita). If you still remember me, you will recall that I've found a programming job, so I've less time for text boards. Yet I promise to finish the Symta and join or start some Lisp OS project.

I also met a beautiful girl. She is a rare girl programmer, graduated from polytechnical university. She is cute, smart and wears glasses (http://minus.com/lwlti63gm5hO4). You wont find another girl like her in Russia, especially Serpukhov.

They only thing I fear is that she Jewish, because she is too smart for a Russian girl and cites Faina Ranevsky. I will kill myself if she is. Help me prog!

their relationship will probably last about as long as nikita's first employment : about a week.

>>81
It is already longer and I will never leave her. Although she may leave me, because I don't have higher education and my salary is less than her, while her dad has a very high respect of engineering education.

>>79
What?!! She is an educated family girl and not a whore.

Make a video on youtube about it.
What is that channel even for anyway?

>>83

I've horrible English pronunciation, so you will hardly understand me. Besides, YT is Terry Davis' patrimony.

>>84

have you fucked the landwh... lady yet?
you gotta find yourself a hotter one dude.

>>85
Maybe he's into fatties, have you considered that?

>>86
Consider this.

*unzips pants*

>>87
Trying to fit in.

>>88

it would help if your anus was a little bigger.

I am a girl programmer ^__^

What is happened to the Russian Winter? There is no snow in Moscow, the grass is green and we were kissing under the rain.

At least America turned into a big snowball!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFfY4JzRuS4

>>91
The American Jews stole your snow.

>>92

Actually, that makes perfect sense! Jews live in Israel and there is a snow in Jerusalem too...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ym_5EGKlfw

>>93
Twitter photos on a YouTube video? What kind of retard makes this?

Anyway, Nikita, I wish to discuss your SQL Lisp thing here. Care to make a thread?

>>94

There is little to discuss, besides the fact that T-SQL is slow, even WITH(NOLOCK). Although something like compiling Lisp directly to SQL would be fast: consider translating (map (+ xs.x 1) xs) into (select xs.name+1 from xs). Still supporting lambdas in T-SQL would require a lot of hacking.

>>95

have you lost your virginity to the landwhale yet?

>>96

You're saying this like losing virginity to cute plump girl is something bad.

>>97

i'll take that as a no.

>>97
It's not a bad thing, Nikita. Please carry on with your life and give us more interesting things to discuss.

[b]* NEW DRAMA HAPPENING RIGHT NOW *[b]

What about the bnoordhuis story? -hartator

What about 9/11? -IsaacSchlueter

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7064470

JOIN!!!

>>100
Can you summarize this for those of us with extensive /etc/hosts files?

>>100
How could npm even monetize?

>>101
Bunch of hipsters talking about some hipsters plan to commercialize noodles dot jizz.

>>103
Thanks. I feel as if I've really read the linked thread, except without the normal accompanying waves of nausea.

Hello, /prog/!

My GF has finally dropped me, because I had no money to pay for her. I'm not a rich Jewish boy, you know, just a programmer without a single dogecoin.

Anyway, I realized the love for Lisp much stronger than for any GF, because programming is an inexpensive hobby and gives back a lot fun. Lisp would never betray you.

>>100

Ironically enough, C# programmers at my workplace despise JS, yet have to work with it to present any HTML at all and make MongoDB running with its serverside JavaScript.

>>105
Nikita, you knew it would happen, yet you did it. Please ignore your urges and instead focus on what really matters: Lisp.

If you ever feel like satisfying your urges, buy an onahole.

>>107

you knew it would happen, yet you did it.

I had to test my assumptions with multiple girls. Call it unit testing (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientific_control#Controlled_experiments)

>>107
Yes lisp is all that matters.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hans_Reiser#Marriage_to_Nina_Sharanova

ReisenFS

>>108
"Unit" testing. Huhuh huhuh.

>>108
Fine.

You'd better not use the same excuse for the next horny hookups.

>>105
Lisp is all that matters. Lisp is the closest a programmer can get to God.

All girls will cost you, but that is part of your duties as a man. Find an old fashioned girl where the only thing she will cost you is a place for her to stay and decorate, and a yard for her to toil in (and I suppose some time). I have one of these. She makes me meals and helps me `relax' under the table while I write programs sometimes. She's also very warm so in the winter I need less blankets. I do not mind that I have to spend slightly more money on food and the occasional peice of furniture. I am grateful that she sees no value in jewelry or eating at expensive places or social events (she is very shy like me). She also brings home some money (but not very much at all).

On a related note, while I was at university, there was this fairly decent looking girl that seemed to be an average programmer. However she seemed to be dating this fat hipster, who was a terrible programmer.

There was also this drop dead gorgeous girl in some of my mathematics classes. She had all those parts that appeal to my animal senses. Large hips, breasts that could hold at least 4L of milk, but she looked like she'd be nothing but trouble.

>>115
Large WHR is correlated with fertility, do you want a screaming midget in your life (which also means less time for Lisp)?

>>114.115
I don't wish to be unkind, but I hope I don't end up like this. Do you really feel this way about significant other, and if so, why are you still in this relationship?
>>116
You mean no little ones to teach lisp?

>>117
I'm happy with my significant other and she is very happy with me. I don't understand your reaction.

You guys are just jealous that nikita has a lover and that you don't and never will.

Here's my future lover www.today.com/style/kate-moss-sister-16-stuns-first-modeling-spread-2D11947780

>>118
Not him, but unless you get something constructive from her (life skills, math knowledge or money), the disadvantages of living with an emotionally unstable being heavily outweigh the advantages, though you're most likely in the middle a ``hormone rush'' that will distort your reasoning and make you think you're actually in a favorable situation. Worry not, those feelings usually go away after you catch your girl squeezing the toothpaste tube from the top.

>>119
I'm not an EXPERT LOVER but I've been in a few relationships and I don't see the goddamn appeal of it. Their idea of fun is not always the same as your idea of fun, you have to be more careful not to be your usual autistic self, sometimes you have to provide emotional support (most /pragues/ can't possibly be good at this), less money and time for yourself, etc. Being with another person for more than 2 hours felt like a burden. Even if the hugs, kisses and lewd groping are very satisfying for my animal self, it's an empty feeling and afterwards I'd feel like shit for wasting so much time instead of reading a book, working on my personal projects or playing a game I want to get better at. And those are things that don't leave the same empty feeling.

The only difference between a true friend and a girlfriend is that the latter will give you sex. You don't need a girlfriend even if you want company. You don't need one either if you want sex, there are plenty of hookers or sluts willing to spread their legs if you're into the ``ebin reddit rave /b/rah XD'' thing.

Before someone shouts ``ur not looking hard enough /b/rah XD'', I don't feel like wasting my time on such pointless pursuit of permanent company. I'm single, almost 40 and satisfied with my current life.