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Why is the Java GC so garbage?

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-22 22:34

It is 2016, why does Java still shit itself like a baby if you try to serve a non-toy amount of traffic with it without tuning your garbage collector settings yourself like some sort of caveman?

Is it so hard to set defaults that don't randomly freeze like a deer caught in the headlights at the sight of multiple qps?

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-23 7:36

Come on. It's the CURRENT YEAR, this shouldn't be an issue anymore!

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-23 11:42

What's a "qp" besides being a nearly-simmetric double-letter combination?

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-23 12:07

>>3
qt pie

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-24 12:06

>>3
It is symmetric, dumbass.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-24 13:21

>>3
QPS = queries per second, HTH HAND xx.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-25 17:31

QPS: Queers Per Second

I can suck off .08 QPS.

This chain saw cuts at 5 QPS.

ISIS is beheading .002 QPS.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-25 19:38

>>5
IN WHAT FONT
IN WHAT FONT HUH

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-26 5:49

What's that OP? Are you saying that an automated function that's tuned for the general case isn't supremely efficient for a specialized case? I'm so sorry OP, have my condolences.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-27 17:33

OP here, update: it turns out you just can't get acceptable performance no matter what. You need to buy a proper GC for $$$ or just make sure not to allocate any objects ever. Good game, Java, "Just as fast as explicit memory management" my ass.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-27 18:25

>>10
Check 'em

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-27 19:03

>>10
Listen up, you stupid fuck. If you're allocating/freeing all over in C that'll add a ton of slow overhead to your program. You need to buy a proper GC for $$$ or make sure not to heap allocate any objects ever. GC is just as fast/slow as explicit memory management, because you underestimate how shit slow the heap is in other languages. If memory management overhead is a problem in any language, you have to do the avoid allocation dance.

Now, go kill yourself.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-27 19:19

>>12
In C you get to choose whether the object goes on the stack or the heap. I don't believe Java gives you a choice. You could be doing something that, in C, lives entirely on the stack, but outside of C, you are at the mercy of the runtime.

Now, go sit in the corner and think about how you could make an ill-considered point without sounding like a condescending dumbass.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-27 19:22

>>13
If you don't understand the situations in which your runtime can decide to stack allocate, you do not deserve to attempt programming. Again, your suicide is overdue. Get on it.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-27 19:32

>>14
You misunderstand. First, I am not >>1. Second, if the set of situations in which your runtime can decide to stack allocate are empty, then you can never make sure not to heap allocate any objects ever. Thus the C-ist's "just don't malloc, dumbass" argument is void.
If that isn't the point you were making, then the only other interpretation of >>12 is just a vapid rewording of >>10, but slightly generalised and with pointless beratement chucked in.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 3:15

>>12,14
You are defending Java, an abandoned piece of shit that's owned by Oracle, not the latest development in programming language research.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 3:17

berate my anus

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 6:23

>>17
dunce

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 11:54

>>16
Why do you believe that Java is abandoned? It gets updates all the time.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 15:04

>>19
Plus, it's the app language used by the most popular OS.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 17:59

GC is shit.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 17:59

Check out = new My(new Dubs());

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-28 18:25

>>20
Pretty sure that's Objective-C.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-29 0:18

>>23
It's Swift now, Opa.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-29 13:45

>>23
Sure, if you want to be all bourgeoisie about what's popular.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-29 15:10

>>23
That's like 10% of the market, tops.

Name: Anonymous 2016-02-29 18:16

>>24
Don't fear the NOMAD. Let the HASKAL in your program.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-01 6:39

>>27
It's not nomads I fear, it's all those fucking monads I'd need just to access a variable.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 20:24

>>28
There are no variables. Just values, bindings and thunks.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 20:30

>>29
You mean, there are no assignables. Haskell has plenty of variables.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 20:32

>>30
Sure, they vary, but are you sure that's not only in your mind?

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 20:39

>>31
A variable is, by definition, an immutable thing that cannot vary. So of course Haskell variables, being actual variables and not some imperative scam, do not vary.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 20:41

>>32
Actually, I'm pretty sure Haskell has had mutable constants for a few years now.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 20:52

>>33
Those are immutable references, and different from imperative assignables which are mutable and thus not variables.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 20:59

>>34
But you have to assign a constant in the first place, otherwise it has undefined value.
Did you mean constant references, which are an variable pointing immutably to a specific datum?

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 21:06

>>35
You are racist.

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-03 21:08

>>36
Just because I'm white!

Name: Anonymous 2016-03-04 3:09

But white people can't be racist, only minorities are.

Name: Anonymous 2016-11-10 17:27

>>12
Don't bother with the heap, stack memory is faster.

>>13
Java puts class objects on the heap, and primitives and references on the stack. You can put primitives on the heap using boxing, though you can't easily put objects on the stack.

>>32
A variable...by definition...cannot vary.

Name: Anonymous 2016-11-13 2:08

>>32
Variables vary.

gasTheKikes = do ... is a constant, not a variable.
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