We all know that one person. He will claim that functional programming is the answer to any problem. When tried to be convinced that he is wrong, he will screech. He will most often push towards using an obsolete toy language like lisp or haskell.
>>3 The worst thing he can do is install ubanto on your computer.
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Anonymous2017-12-21 6:35
>>4 Except that a true fp wizard wouldn't install Unix on your computer. He'd probably just install GNU Emacs and tickle your feet a little bit by licking them like a cat with is rough tongue and wispy beard.
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Anonymous2017-12-21 7:13
It’s seldom challenged. There is currently billions of dollars invested in a fucking haskell crypto at this very moment. We are already past the event horizon.
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Anonymous2017-12-21 7:37
common subspecies is The Typefag. typefags use Hurry Coward Correspondence to claim that typefaggotry is the only way to write correct programs and that it allows them to make programs that are provably bug-free, halitng problem be damned
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Anonymous2017-12-23 1:19
>>7 they don't say that functional programming is beautiful tho
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Anonymous2017-12-23 18:22
Me: i have this jave problem how do i do it Goblin: i would suggest haskell its one line with nomads Me: but i am maintaining a large system written in java Goblin: haskel
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Anonymous2017-12-23 18:51
Me: i have this solution that i can solve with pythone Weenie: let me write it in c its one with the eldritch gods Me: but im already finished and have a working solution Weenie: ``no''
Next year, I'm going to convince our CTO to have us redo one of our systems using FRP style architecture from Elm, but in C++17.
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Anonymous2017-12-24 22:25
>>14 Also, the secret to doing this is to never mention "functional programming". Just say you have a new modern C++17 way of solving the problem that will result in a 2x reduction of LoC and reduced maintenance overhead.