The X.Org Foundation is looking for one female to fund in the months ahead to do some sort of work for the open-source project...
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Anonymous2015-06-14 19:00
>>3 Some sort of work. And then they'll give her an award that says they recognize her efforts. Then they'll tell a man to do it all for her, he'll do it in a day, but won't even get paid.
>>6 Is he some kind of stormfag? I can't believe that having "USA" in his handle was the only reason why he got cuck'ed.
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Anonymous2015-06-14 21:40
>>7 he advocated against females getting benefits for the sole reason of being females:
"Fucking hell. This has got to stop. This is the worst kind of gender discrimination attacking directly on one group of people, based on their sex/gender identity. Basically they say you are free to have any sex assigned to you at birth and you are free to identify as anything you may want, EXCEPT you must not be genetically male AND identify as a male at the same time.
Imagine going to a job interview and being told that you may get the job if you are willing to put on a dress and tell them that you don't quite feel like a male all of a sudden."
Name:
nigger4202015-06-14 23:05
I don't feel comfortable on /prog/ with people like >>8 posting hate speech. Please delete this. Yes I know he's "just" quoting it but it hurts.
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blackwomynofcolor2015-06-14 23:12
>>8 This kind of ppl is precisely the reason tings like Trayvond or he Matress girl happen. Dey are reapists, racists and should be burned in ovens for their h8 crimes dat they want to commit but havent commited yet1
is feminism even real i feel like it's all just an elaborate joke at this point
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Anonymous2015-06-14 23:58
https://pipedot.org/story/2014-11-21/opensource-game-rejected-from-debian-for-authors-social-beliefs "Those of you unfamiliar with them might find Mikee's maps for the old Linux crossfire rpg enlightening. Apart from being horribly buggy, they have "views" that were certainly never mainstream spread throughout them. Female characters have ridiculous, puerile dialogue, bizarre references to torturing feminists and being rewarded with child brides abound... the whole thing seemed completely unhinged."
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Anonymous2015-06-15 0:25
>>13 Okay. Try openly stating, that females are inferior in their brains to males. You'll quickly lose your job or university position. Even if you are 100% biologically correct.
>>14 That was pretty clearly flamebait. You'd have to be out of your fucking mind to lead with "It is with great esteem and supreme pleasure that I am here tonight to inform you that I hate you, your guts, and every female on earth who shares the desire to rebel against men [...]" on a mailing list named debian-women and not expect vitrol and a ban.
To contrast, someone proposed putting Unteralterbach in Debian, an actual pedo game with several loli sex scenes (based on real life lolies none-the-less!), and even though the consensus ended in a no, the discussion was quite civil and the only drama feminists cunts made was on outside forums, bitching about how there wasn't outrage on the mailing list. First message: https://lists.debian.org/debian-devel-games/2014/03/msg00016.html
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Anonymous2015-06-15 0:36
>>16 How does his relation with women affects the software he produces?
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Anonymous2015-06-15 0:53
>>17 It doesn't, but the links presented make it sound like he was using the mailing lists, and later the bug tracking system, as his shitposting platform. But: just because it doesn't affect the quality of his programs, doesn't mean that he should stick around. I mean, I like trolling and shitposting as much as anyone here, but I'm not surprised when I get banned for it. On a project the size of Debian, he's not that valuable; games are some of the most useless of all potential projects.
I understand, of course, that he is obviously being framed to be much more of a villain than he probably is. Believe me, I understand aaaaaaalllllll about that. And as a pedophile myself, I really want to feel bad for this guy, but I simply can't.
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 0:58
>>18 Again, he wasn't persecuted for shitposting in general, but for being politically incorrect. Had he been posting pictures of cats, nobody would have noticed him.
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 1:01
>>18 Also, games ain't useless. Games allowed for cheap GPUs and advancements in AI. Many parents would testify that games hobby helped their kids to avoid drugs and street crime involvement.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 1:04
We don't know, but statistics don't lie. It is highly improbable that so few women would be interested in this project
Are all feminists this stupid? (S)He proposes a statistical hypothesis without proof and proclaims that his pet hypothesis is "statistics" which "don't lie". This is about the same level of shit-headery as to say that men are just as likely to have vaginas as dicks, because statistics don't lie.
It is highly improbable that so few men would have vaginas. What are the odds? There is clearly some discrimination going on. We need to support the rights of men with vaginas!!1
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Anonymous2015-06-15 1:28
have you ever seen some of these girls? they're the kind that you want to get out of the kitchen, because htey're so fat
Replace that with "male", "white", or "asian" and see how quickly everyone cries about discrimination, but "female" or "black" is OK? This is beyond retarded.
Female characters have ridiculous, puerile dialogue, bizarre references to torturing feminists and being rewarded with child brides abound...
This sounds hilarious.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 7:24
>>29 CHAR N CUDDER CHAR N CUDDER CHAR N CUDDER CUDDER CUDDER CHAR N CUDDER CHAR N CUDDER CHAR N CUDDER CUDDER CUDDER
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Anonymous2015-06-15 7:27
>>29 so my company (progrider.org) is looking for male developers. female developers can apply to, providing they're infertile (basically male). no fertile females on my ship, cunts
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Anonymous2015-06-15 8:17
>>32 I wonder what would happen if a company actually published that in a job posting. It's very pragmatically sexist. They just don't want to offer maternity leave.
And then when they finish, the screen will say, ``Thank you for completing our Risk Assessment Survey''.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 8:28
And the choices would be like:
5. When being cummed inside, how often is it inside of your vagina?
a. Every time. b. 1/4 of the time in the vagina, 3/4 of the time in the anus. c. 3/4 of the time in the vagina, 1/4 of the time in the anus. d. All in the anus.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 8:48
He got banned because he's a child rapist. So? I'm 100% ok with it.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 8:52
>>33 I didn't post that because of maternity leave, I just don't want all of you buzzing around the girl, and trying to get her to give you her email address/IRC nickname
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Anonymous2015-06-15 9:03
>>37 That violated his freedom of expression though. Why should someone's views on raping children affect their ability to participate in software development process, if they make sure to constantly inform other participants of their views?
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Anonymous2015-06-15 9:11
>>34 my penis blasts my semen straight through all that period blood, and the semen forms a nice layer around the girl's ovaries
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Anonymous2015-06-15 13:43
Freedom of speech only applies if I agree with what you say.
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 14:29
Remember, in your modern society you can't express freely your views but you have to support faggot sex/marriage/etc I dislike pedophiles but this is extremely hypocritical (he might not even be a pedo).
The project is fully libre/free/opensource. Code and media. DFSG compliant. Similar projects all are packaged, including ones that are not DFSG compliant. This one is not. They refused to allow an earlier DFSG compliant work (a casino) game who had a disliked person (anti-social-justice/anti-feminist opinion) as a contributor. Is this why they rejected this libre videogame?
If so is there any action that can be taken to expose the true
I don't mind pedos to much, and think his dismissal was justified, for acting like an ass. But I'm definitely with >>45. Take the fucking culture wars somewhere else. Stop trying to get /prog/ involved in this sort of bullshit.
You never say that when SJWs are speaking, only when opposition.
I don't mind pedos to much, and think his dismissal was justified, for acting like an ass.
He was dismissed for being against women's rights. This is why his projects were deleted and rejected. That is opensource meritocracy.
In the past such a person would then either give up or kill the people doing the cencoring, but this is the internet now and it isn't one on one contact.
>>38 Please stop harassing cudder. And if you haven't noticed, I've been picking up all the /prog/riders and having hot gay sex with them. So you should harass me as well.
It thought >>34-36 was so funny when I wrote it, but now not at all.
>>47-48,50-51 Just fuck off, it's clear there's like 1 or 2 people making 90% of the posts in this thread seeing as it has gotten over 50 posts in a day which is far higher than average for most random threads here.
No one gives a shit about your retardation wars. This isn't the place for that. Go on your little raid imageboards if you want to get a gang of mongoloids together to harass maintainers for banning annoying retards from their mailing lists. This isn't the place for you.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 17:31
>>54 "Annoying Retards" who code, make media, make music, and have something to show of from their time. What is it that you do?
Oy vey, Admin-goy gave >>51 my posting history! Or maybe he hasn't and >>51 is just a Reddit retard with a persecution complex amd mild delusions. Why are you not content circlejerking about how terrible this is somewhere else, as you have been asked time and time again?
Just kill yourself. Or don't. Mentally ill halfwits abound here.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 17:54
I host this site.
Do you do all of these: code, record music, produce pixel art, 2d levels for vidiya, textures, 3d models, 3d architecture, and all for free (libre)?
If not, you got nothing on the guys who merely post here.
But hosting: ie: being in a position of control, seems to be what SJWs strive for. It counts more than all the contribs in the world.
>>61 W O W yet another shitty Quake based FPS that can't even decide what the mechanics are. I'm SO impressed, please tell me all about your political views, they are so relevant now. Why would I be surprised that someone posting SRS circlejerk material has horrible taste and no skill--besides even believe that you're the author of this project just because you say you are?
>>62 Great. Why don't you make a post about the features instead?
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Anonymous2015-06-15 18:13
Games are worthless toys. Only buffoons and teenagers or worthless nip NEETs would waste time making them instead of being someone else's bitch. Might as well be one of those losers who gets massive upboats on a porn site for making comments about the whore's cunt or whatever.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 18:17
>>66 Video games are useful for training AI for killer robots.
>>62 Feel free to post about the technical aspects of your games all you want, but you should realize that /prog/ isn't a political action group, no matter which side of the fence you sit on.
Write about the technical merits of your software, or feel free to take your political debates elsewhere, thanks.
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Anonymous2015-06-15 18:27
>>68 Your big fat purple is sticking out of the robe again! It's saying hello to me and it wants in my anus!
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Anonymous2015-06-15 20:23
>>64 Lets see your contributions. Kids that do nothing are "not impressed" even with AAA games. They're simply consumers, like yourself. They'll never know the joy of making them :).
When I was 14 I went deep sea fishing with my g/f Jody. I was 14 and she was 19. Well it so happened that my dad who was captaining the boat was drinking a lot of beer like 2 packs of 12 and he fell sound asleep. Me and Jody were bored. So we started making out and it was real hot under the sun and we went down into the cabin and made out more. We fell asleep and when I woke up I found her hands on my giant (approx 13 inch) lovemaker. She started to rub it like a genie bottle and that felt really good. Then she took off my pants and tried to get my meat baton in her mouth but kinda choked on it. By that time I was starting to feel REAL good. So I told her to take off her bra and she said "I have to take off my shirt first silly!". So she took off her shirt and bra and rubbed my erect sausage all over her 34DD nicely tanned boobies. At that time I spurted clear stuff all over her and she laughed. This made me brake up in tears because it looked like I wasnt a man enough for her or something and then she started telling me "No thats not what I meant!!" and started making out again. So after another 10 minutes of making out we started getting hard. She took off her pants and told me to lay down. I laid down with my 13" woman pleaser sticking right up and she lowered down on to me till I was fully inserted into her birth canal. So I lasted like 30 seconds and shot like a rocket into her and bodily fluids were gushing everywhere. She looked like she was going to laugh again and I was like Im gonna punch you in the ovaries and she really started laughing then so I pushed her on her belly and rammed my meat roll in and out of her till she SCREAMED "OH RODNEY! OH RODNEY! YES YES YES!" and then my dad woke up and saw what was going on and told us to finish up. I tried to finish but was too embarrassed. When I put my clothes back on and went back to the deck my dad told me he arranged a prostitute and she was never my g/f the entire time!
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 20:25
>>66 Indeed, the greatest joy in life comes from being an employee churning out code. Anyone who disagrees is a skitzo/mentally ill.
Employed SJW code churner, who is not impressed by libre games (not that he could even begin to contribute) has yet to show us his works. It has been months now.
I went to the dildo shop today. The first thing I noticed was a nerdy looking asian girl inspecting dildos intensely. I found that to be amusing.
Then the dildo shop owner came and asked me if I needed any help. I told here that I needed a dildo as a gift for my girlfriend. She said sure and led me to the anal dildo section. She saw right through my lie. That makes me nervous.
She then asked me how much I was going to want to pay for a good dildo, and I named 50$. She said that that would buy a quality dildo.
She then handed me a large dildo with soft rubber bumps on it. I said that it looked good. It was pink. The pink dildo makes me feel much more feminine.
She then lead me to the register, where she explain that there were no returns for dildos. People might use them and then take them back. I found that to be a reasonable policy.
So she asked me to open it to ensure that it was working. She even gave me a free battery so it could vibrate. I thought that that was very kind.
As I walked out of the store, I noticed that the girl from before was still studying the dildos. I wonder if she ever found what she wanted.
How does it feel? I'll describe exactly what it felt like. I was young at the time but remembered everything. I was easily aroused, and by the time he was taking his pants off, I was getting hard. I felt like a girl, because let's face it, you're being one. It turned me on like a switch just thinking it. But, then, it got weird. When I began to kneel, with my penis waiting to be unleashed in my pants, I felt strange. "I'm about to suck a dick. It's not my penis, I'm going to taste a dick and pleasure it". I mean, it felt extremely bizarre, just knowing that I, was going to suck a dick! There's no other way to put it up. I think it was much more because I'm not gay, I do enjoy anal masturbation and get aroused by cocks, but not gay, it was just a fetish for the uncommon. Then it began. I grabbed the penis, it was extremely hard, and rubbed the foreskin a little, to feel what another guy's penis felt like. Then... It felt good, actually. I decided to put it in my mouth by sliding my lips slowly. When I placed my lips closed on the tip, that was it, no holding back now. I felt the tip and the hole and I was just about to cum by the feel.
His dick had it's helmet really wet, so I started sliding my wet lips further, until I had the helmet entirely on my mouth. God, it felt incredible. I slowly put my lips back, to taste it, to feel the cock, and I came in my pants. Cumming got me severely aroused, so I said to my self "to hell with this", I grabbed the cock and shoved it into my mouth before it touched my gag reflex. Hell, sucking a dick was the most delicious thing I've ever experienced. It was absolutely delightful. How it felt in my mouth, It was like having an incredibly warm dildo, with an unique texture I can't compare yet, but I could feel the shape of the dick inside my mouth. It feels really big in your mouth, you have every single thing in your mouth tho please it, it feels big, and hot, and that aroused me even more. With the dick in my mouth, I started to lick it, first up and down, and then in circles, while sucking it back and forward and having a grip on the base of it with my hand, never letting it go. I could taste the precum coming out, and I don't know it it was for the arousal but it tasted glorious. I then began doing a circular motion with my lips.
I then felt brutally sluttish. I wished I knew how to deep-throat (which I know now), because just thinking of having an entire, hot, delicious huge cock in my throat gets me incredibly hard and jerk off just by thinking about it. I eventually finished the guy, and he didn't tell me he was about to cum, so it got me by surprise, a delightful surprise. I felt his cock being contracted, and I stopped moving, I thought "is he about to cum? oh what the hell", and let him load of all his milk on my mouth. To be honest, it tasted extremely salty, and as mentioned in the last thread, it is highly alkaline, and my tongue felt really weird. I didn't swallow it, instead, I spat it on my hand while he sat on a couch tired, and used the cum to jerk off, and came almost 10 seconds after starting. I took my cum and rubbed his dick with it, and he didn't oppose. And that's the gist of it.
Homosexuality is objectively immoral because it is a self-destructive behavior.
It is self-destructive because anal sex is unhealthy due to the fact that the anal tears caused by penetration are infected by the fecal matters of the receiver of the penis. This contamination of the blood stream causes a plethora of diseases.
The same is also true for oral sex, which has now been shown to cause mouth cancer in rates exceeding tobacco. Plus, the tears of the penis caused by the teeth can also result in infection to the receiver of oral sex.
Masturbation is the most healthy of the sexual practices of homosexual, but it is not completely safe since hands are one of dirtiest places on the body which can cause infection to the penis. Also, masturbation is often accompanied by the other sexual acts mentioned bellow. The only way for homosexuality to be acceptable would be for the homos to solely engage in mutual masturbation after having decontaminated the body parts involved (hands, penis).
This is why homosexuality is for the most part objectively immoral.
In a small apartment in New York City, there is a man who goes by the name of moot who may be willing to fulfill your wish -- for a price. If you wish to continue, buy a plane ticket to New York City and bring a computer and enough clothes and money for at least seven days. Upon arrival, go to the nearest Starbucks and ask the barista for Christopher Poole. Upon hearing this, the barista will be able to direct you to the mysterious moot. Follow his instructions to the letter and do not skip any step. When you reach the apartment the door may be locked. If it is, you must hide in the building until moot arrives. If it is unlocked, enter slowly but carefully, saying "I am a huge faggot please rape my face." Moot will appear before you wearing nothing but a New York Yankees cap. He will ask if you have ever had anal. You must respond in the negative even if it is a lie. You must immediately bare your rear and bend over. Moot will proceed to insert his erect penis into your rectum. When he fills your anus with his love juice, he will tell you that you are the tightest lover he has ever had. After seven days, moot will show you his 4chan server room. He will bring you into a black windowless van. Let him tie you up and blindfold you until you arrive at the server location. He will guide you into the room and untie you and remove your blindfold. He will then warn you not to touch anything and leave for a coffee break. At this time head to the nearest computer and access the servers. The username "moot" and the password "faggot" will permit full access to every post and thread ever created, including the child pornography which he has saved for personal use. At this time, open a web browser and access /b/. This is for cover: do not waste any time on the inane comments of the imageboards. When it has loaded, log into a virtual console then navigate to the prog directory and edit the file containing the thread. If you succeed and are able to log out in time, he will not notice anything wrong and will make you an Admin over all the boards and give you a free 4chan Pass for life. If he catches you, immediately switch to X and tell him you were browsing the imageboards. He will tell you that ordinarily you would not be allowed to leave, but since you must be a very clever hacker to access his server, he will let you leave with a warning never to speak to him again or tell anyone of his location. He will then shoot you with a tranquilizer and you will wake up on the floor outside his apartment. As a final warning, you must never under any circumstances use your Admin login to insult Jews or post to the textboards, as moot records all of his sexual encounters with a hidden camera.
Don't even fucking say a word. I like potato chips, and can't eat them very much or I'll get fat.
I tried out these Pringles Fat-Free chips because they were super low-cal. BBQ flavor. the fuck.
The can said they had 70 calories per serving, which meant the whole can had 490 calories inside total. I could munch through a can in a day with my lunch, dinner, etc. So I got several cans, and began enjoying one a day for the past four days. But what they dont fucking tell you...
Except in tiny print you cant read without a fucking electron microscope
...is that the primary ingredient is something called "olean" which I have since learned is Latin for "Unwashable & Indestructible Ass Grease."
Oh Yeah. I'm not even kidding.
So today, while I'm standing in the living room debating whether or not Laundry or Dishes will get done first, I get the urge to fart. I live alone, so sweet. I let the honk loose and its wrong. Something just sounded wrong. I know my own wind, and I have never farted a sound that sounded like a fart wrapped in a pillow.
Oh yes, something was very wrong. I had just shat myself. But this evil olean makes shitting yourself sound almost like a regular fart, and had I not been particularly attentive, it could easily have gone unnoticed, I'm telling you. THAT's how utterly covert and evil this olean stuff is. What the fuck?! What if I'd gone out to hang with friends or gone for a drive, what then?
So I walk carefully to the bathroom and disrobe. before I even sit on the toilet, I wad paper and carefully wipe from the front. Sure enough, it was light brown, and had the texture of soft spackle. You fucking Pringle bastards.
I sat down and pushed a bit, and lo, out came a jet that I didnt even feel an urge for one minute earlier. It piled in the bowl like brown marshmallow fluff.
The problem rose when I tried to wipe. I went through a whole fucking roll of TP and could not get it all off me. So.
I jumped in the shower. Yep, its gross, but it had to be done. There I stood, water pouring down, cheeks spread, and using my own hand to make certain I'm clean.
That was when I discovered that after using my hand to wipe myself (before I soaped the area) my hand came back covered in some sort of transparent grease. It was so fucking foul. The grease made water bead off my hand. It was tacky too, and very difficult to manage.
So I grabbed the bar of saop and went to work.
You fucking Pringle bastards.
The bar of soap came away coated in grease as well, and would no longer wash. I had to turn the water to hot and massage the soap for five minutes to get it to the point where I could use it again. It took me an hour to get the fucking grease off my pucker. I shudder to think of what its doing INSIDE ME right now, but I will damned sure never eat that shit again.
Fucking Pringle bastards.
This is where the joke about "anal leakage" came from. its real. Fuck Pringles.
This HOW-TO explains how to perform Buttsex in the Linux Operating System w/Enterprise Resources (LOSER). This HOW-TO assumes basic knowledge of general Linux operation.
Preparation Most basically, all Linux Buttsex requires is a machine running the Linux Operating System, a penis (also referred to as a "cock" or "dick"), and a willing friend. However, you benefit greatly, especially when starting out, if you posess standard Buttsex tools.
Standard Buttsex Tools Lubricant - Slippery stuff you smear on your johnson and your friend's manpussy, to ease the transition into Buttsex mode. Vaseline will do in a pinch, but water-based lubricants such as KY Jelly and Astroglide are preferable.
Contraception - Protective barrier between your schlong and the inside of your friend's love canal. Breeders use them to prevent pregnancy, but we queer nancies usually use them to protect ourselves from the deadly AIDS virus. While some enterprising faggots have made do with plastic wrap or masking tape, there is no substitute for a latex condom. Most all condoms will do, as long as they aren't the "extra-thin" type. Some condoms are labelled as beiong superior for Buttsex, but are not necessary.
Step One -- Prepare the Anus This step is especially important if your friend has never taken a willie in the ass before. Prepare his anus for the width and girth of your manhood with the "finger" command. It is used like so:
% finger [insert your friend's name here]
Begin with your index or middle finger, and then both middle AND index fingers, at the same time. Ten to fifteen minutes should do. If you wish, you may felate him or suck his balls, while you're fingering him.
Step Two -- Entry Here the fun starts. Have your friend lay prone on the bed, or even better, get down "on all fours". Optionally, place a couple pillows beneath him to make him more comfortable. Now position yourself behind him, and spread his asscheeks. Apply lubricant, generously, to both your sexrod, and his pit of pleasure. It is advisable to stick your fingers partially inside in his anus, to make sure that the entire edge of the entry is covered.
Your penis must be fully erect in order to make a sucessful entry. If you are not already "hard as a rock", you may rub your penis in his asscrack, while tweaking his nipples (or stroking his cock), and saying intimidating things, such as "I am going to make you squeal like a pig, boy. Squeal, like a pig!".
When your sexstick is sufficiently engorged with blood, it is time to being entry. Place the head of your cock firmly against his brown anal starfish. Begin applying firm pressure forwards, optionally using your hand to guide your dick on a true course into sodomy. Your friend is most likely moaning in agony or yelping, and you may either ignore this, or in a snide tone, say "You like that, bitch?".
When your penis is in, move on to the next step.
Step Three -- Hardcore Assramming This is fairly simple. Move your dick around in his ass, towards and then back, at varying speeds. If for some reason your dick pops out, put in back in, undaunted. Continue pumping and thrusting until you feel you are ready to move on to Step Four.
Step Four -- Orgasm When ready to blow your load, use this command:
% stdout > ass
This redirects your standard output stream into your friend's pink tunnel of shit. Enter the command, then with one final thrust, placing the entire length of your cock inside his body. Your penis will then eject about a quart of sticky white semen, accompanied by tremendous pleasure.
Step Five -- Cleanup
If you wore a condom, cleanup is simple. Remove the condom and toss it out your window. Then sop up any other jizz, anal juice, shit, or lubricant with Brawny(R) brand paper towels.
If you did not wear a condom, your friend will have a steady drip of cum out of his ass for the next few hours. Tell him to "buck up" and stuff some toilet paper in his underwear.
Afterward
Congratulations! You are now a l337 LUN1X 4$$r4mm3r, just like Linux Toreballs and his gay minions! Celebrate by masturbating to the sensual gay erotica found at http://www.goatse.cx/ [goatse.cx].
Troubleshooting
My penis isn't long enough to get past the buttcheeks! Only Jon Katz has this problem. Jon, I've told you to just get the damned surgery.
I have a really small penis, but it's still difficult to get it in the ass! Only Jon Katz has this problem, because he fucks little boys. Jon, get the damned surgery, and find a lover over the age of 12.
Do you know where I can find kiddie pr0n? Please go away, Katz.
As I started unwrapping the box I realized the gift was not the published collection of Cheryl Strayed columns I had hoped for but instead, it was a pink dildo.
An 8-inch shiny, hot pink dildo.
I kept staring at it, unsure of what to say. Then I realized the box had already been opened.
When I asked Mike about it he said, “Oh. That.”
He beamed.
“Yeah…the dildo has already been used.”
Used?
“What do you mean?”
“While you were out of town I took the liberty of using it on myself a few times. Don’t worry. I washed it. Should be clean. I was hoping you’d change your mind on the anal topic. ”
He was still beaming and excitedly awaiting my reaction. I guess it wasn’t so much that my boyfriend gave me a dildo for Christmas, as it was the sheer fuckery of receiving a used dildo for Christmas, that had been up his ass many times. Like, can a girl just get a nice gift set from LUSH Cosmetics or a $20 gift certificate to Barnes and Noble? Not to mention, hadn’t I already told this asshat I wasn’t interested in participating in any anal stuff? And I’m sorry, BUT WHO GIVES SOMEONE A USED DILDO? WHO?
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 20:30
I hope that one day I can be a trap and marry someone from /prog/. I would wear a pretty little dress and while I am cooking spaghetti he would bend me over, rip my dress and fill me up with his hard cock, railing me so hard I get tears in my eyes that eventually run down my cheeks and act as a seasoning for the spaghetti.
My legs would be so weak from being ravished he would pick me up and take me upstairs to bed and fuck me again and again making me incapable of walking and filling me with a love and lust I thought could never happen in such a dimension.
The spaghetti is overbooked and ruined by this point, so he sucks my dick and I blow in his mouth, we make out with the semen and this ends up being our serving of protein for the day.
Back at MIT, the Sussman was eating a tuna fish sandwich, something reserved for the aristocracy. The catchphrase on the can read, "You cannot tune a filesystem, but you can eat a tunafish sandwich!" It wasn't very well-received, of course, but it was well-enough known at this point to remain.
The Sussman munched on the delicious, moist tuna thoughtfully when all of a sudden he sensed behind hi a list comprehension. THE ABELSON! The Sussman leaped out of his seat, his wizard hat almost flying off his head (it was kept on by a quick (def (f x y) (f y x))).
And just in time - the Abelson's blow, intended to truncate the Sussman's tuna-filled spleen his the wooden wizard chair, which shattered into a thousand pieces.
"Well, well Sussman, I see you've maintained some of your skills from 6.001. You may have dodged that expression, but how long do you think you can hold out against my Python3000?"
"THREE THOUSAND?!" the Sussman shouted in response, cackling. "You never understood, Hal; you couldn't defeat me with PythonOver9000."
"What are you talking about Gerry. I've seen your powe--" he stopped, mouth agape as the sudden realization dawned over him. "NO, IT CANNOT BE!"
"YES. YOUR SUSPICIONS ARE CORRECT, HAL. I'VE BEEN SUPRESSING MY POWER LEVEL."
"HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE??!" Hal shouted. In desperation, the Abelson hurled a fury of list comprehensions, dictionaries and exceptions at the Sussman, but Gerry easily knocked aside the feeble incantations.
"You never understood, Hal," he chastised as he prepared his final attack, "it was always as simple as EVAL-APPLY!!!!!!!" he shouted as he unleashed the ultimate spell at the Abelson.
The world froze.
Few people have ever seen a spell of such power; few people could even wield it and even fewer were willing to use it. In this terrible, suspenseful moment, the world froze. Completely. This isn't just a literary artefact, something had segfaulted.
Sepples took a look at the screen. "Motherfucker!" he swore. Somebody had been running a fucking Ruby interpretter, which has exhaused not only the machine's physical memory, but also used up all the allocated swap space. He'd have to reboot the system from the last savestate and re-run the computation another day.
I had secretly fantasized about getting charged up. I'm a bareback bottom , love to get fucked, and having a guy breed my hole. The idea of having a hot guy fuck me and blow his dirty seed in all in my ass had inspired many spank marathons. I'm sure that I have taken a poz load before not knowing the status of whoever was fucking me or really even caring for that matter. I had never knowingly let a guy that was poz fuck me. One night I was cruising all the slut sites looking for other bareback guys to play with when this really hot guy messaged me. He said that he had read in my profile that I liked to go bare and that I was a btm. He told me that he was looking 4 a hole to use 4 the evening. That got my attention I had never been submissive and must admit it had been another fantasy of mine to completely give up control. He asked me if I was into pnp and I told him that I do party sometimes. We chatted 4 a little while with the standard Q&A, u know how big, what position, where to cum. Then I asked poz/neg? He responded with poz. I told him that I was neg. To which he responded "u want to get a charged load n u tonight?" I was shocked and very turned on, I asked him if he fucked neg guys bareback. He told me he did all the time and that he even hosted several conversion party’s. I wasn’t familiar with the term, he explained that a conversion party’s was were a group of poz tops get together and breed a neg guy. The soul reason 4 this was to spread dirty seed, and infect the neg btm. Before I could answer he asked me if I liked to pnp. I told him that I did, but I didn’t have any party supplies. He said that if I wanted I could come over to his place and get ass fucked and get high.
I've always considered myself totally heterosexual, and never even considered a sexual experience with another guy. That was until I began surfing the net. I began to find sites like this and others which had stories and pictures posted of men enjoying other men sexually. I began to think about it more and more, and for the first time in my life fantasized about other men while masturbating. Since watching women masturbate was always my biggest turn-on, it only seemed natural that the thought of men masturbating might also excite me... I was right.
After almost a year of exploring on the Web and in MforM chatrooms, I knew that I somehow had to experience something in real life. But I certainly didn't want to do it with a stranger.
The person I looked to was my best friend Darl. I would soon discover that Darl fit the description of the type of guy that excited me from my on-line experiences. He was thin, with nice muscle tone, but not considered built, he had dark hair a nice tan and had a completely smooth chest and stomach and hardly any hair on his legs. Even though we had been friends since high school (now in our early 20's) I had never seen him totally nude. I was becoming increasingly curious.
Even though we're very close, I found it very difficult to bring up the subject. I did it as subtlety as possible; one day while surfing the net together I "accidently" stumbled upon the M/M stories posted on your page. I purposely went to the hottest ones and pretended to read them for the first time with him.
I kind of said very casually after reading them that I couldn't believe that they were actually a "bit" of a turn-on.(In reality I was ready to explode just discussing it with him). I asked him if he ever thought about sex with a guy, and after some initial denying it, he did confess to dreaming about it once in a while. I told him I thought it might be interesting under the right circumstances.
Well, the right circumstances came about a month later. We were at his house, it was a very hot day and we were swimming in his pool. I had just finished some laps and I crawled up into the floating pool lounge to catch some sun while Darl continued to swim. As I laid in the very hot sun, I began to watch Darl in the pool. I couldn't believe how much I was getting turned on watching his very smooth body slice through the blue water. It actually scared me a little, because I really didn't want to be bisexual; I love girls.
I couldn't resist the urge though; as he swam by me I extended my leg out, pushing it into his back, pretending to hold him under. I was just dying to feel his skin under my own, even if it was my foot. He swam out from under me and fought back, overturning my lounge bringing me into the water with him. We started underwater wrestling, and I purposely fought hard just to hold on to him. The smell of the chlorine on top of his skin was intoxicating. I was going crazy.
I knew I had to stop or I was going to embarrass myself. I broke free and got out of the pool, grabbing my towel quickly to cover the growing bulge in my bathing suit. I laid down on the lounge for a bit, but I couldn't get my erection to subside.
"Does being out in the sun too long make you horny sometimes?" I asked him.
He laughed, "yeah, of course it does. Hot sun always does ".
I got up from the chair and started toward the house, telling him I needed to get out of the heat. I went upstairs to his room, fortunately his parents were both working. In his room he had a VCR and I knew some x-rated movies. I put one in the machine and began watching it, my cock was so hard I was going crazy. The scene was a girl/girl encounter, but all I could think of was feeling his body in the pool.
"What are you doing?" he asked from the doorway
"I'm really horny, I told you."
"I can see that," he said looking down toward my crotch. "Just go take care of yourself in the bathroom." he said.
"But then I won't be able to see the film," I said, while pushing on my cock through my swim trunks. I could see his eyes were fixed on my hand pushing on my cock. I don't think he knew what to make of it, but I could see that his own bathing suit was rising a bit in the front. This scared me to death, but also excited me so much that I was encouraged to continue.
I slid my hand up my left leg to rub inside my suit, I pretended be interested in the film again, but I couldn't help but turn back and stare at his ever growing bulge. Finally there was no hiding it for him either. I kind of smirked and gestured for him to sit down and watch the film with me.
He did just that, sitting next to me on the floor about six feet away. We were now both rubbing our cocks under our suits and watching these two girls 69 each other on the tv.
The more we got into it though, I noticed that Darl kept looking toward me more than he was watching the screen. This was fine by me; It was all I could do not to stare right at his bulge. I could feel my heart racing and my breathing quicken.
I new somebody had to take the first step, I slid off my trunks, exposing to him my very hard 7 1/2 inch cock. He was totally fixed on me from that ppoint on, and a little shocked that I'd done it.
"Come on," I said, "You mine as well be comfortable,"
Without further suggestion he pulled off his bathing suit, and I got my first look at another guy's erect penis. He was hard, and actually his dick looked similar to mine, I discovered we both keep our pubic hair cut very close and our balls shaved.
I leaned back against his bed and faced him, inspiring him to also turn and lean against the wall to face my way. we were now totally ignoring the movie and concentrating on each other's hands working of our hard cocks.
Our eyes drifted back and forth between each others crotches and the expression of pure desire on the other's face. What turns me on so much about watching people get themselves off is that look in their eyes, when they reach the point of no return; where they must cum at any cost. Darl and I both had that look in our eyes.
Darl brought his hand up to his mouth and licked his palm to wet it and returned it to his cock. I followed his lead. The chlorine had made my cock a bit dry and my saliva made stroking easier.
When a drop of pre-cum appeared on my head, I brushed it with my fingertip and brought it to my waiting tongue. Darl watched with delight, "I thought I was the only one who did that," he moaned.
I was getting close and so was he, we were both laying back now, hips rocking in rhythmic motion.
"Fuck, I never thought this could be so hot," he moaned, almost screamed.
I couldn't resist, "Cum with me Darl". I screamed.
I jumped up and moved closer to him; I didn't consider the consequences, I didn't care, I just had to feel him. I moved next to him so our legs were touching, then in a more daring move I rubbed my cock against his leg. "Cum on me Darl," I screamed.
He too was beyond control and he moved forward and knelt in front of me. Our legs were together and our cocks even brushed together. I wanted so bad to kiss him at that moment, but I couldn't, I also wanted to suck on his nipple but I held back. Feeling his cock against mine would suffice. I looked directly into his eyes as my cock exploded, sending blast after blast of semen against his stomach. He burst too flooding my own chest and stomach. We collapsed into back and stare
Hi! My name is Sakuya and I want to tell you a story! I joined Alice, Reimu and Marisa on their adventure to Japan! We all wanted to see what a dick looked like because we had never seen one. We heard they were very hard, so we had some pads to protect us. We all got into a small, poorly made, Japanese vehicle and started to drive downtown. We saw a weird midget and a really big faggot! It almost yelled at us, but Reimu made the car move faster. Whew, that was close! We passed by a bar full of gay men. It was very FABULOUS! After we made it to Akihabara , Reimu spotted a penis. It was very big and hard, just like our friends said. Good thing we had lots of condoms with us! The penis swarmed right at us and he penetrated our vaginas! I was sure we were done for, but then Marisa said she would go talk to the dick. "Hi there Mr. Dick. You penetrated our vaginas! Why would you do such a thing?" The prick didn't want to talk to Marisa. He raped her, and it looked like he was going to cum in her! But never fear, because Alice, Reimu and I went out to save her! We brought some condoms with us. They threw the condoms at the penis, and it started to throb. It let go of Marisa, and we all got back into the car. When I told my friends at Scarlet Devil Mansion what happened, they didn't believe me. "You're lying, Sakuya! There is no dick big enough to do that! I'll go down and see it for myself!" But that's ANOTHER story! The end.
To the best of my memory, before I came to the saving grace of Jesus Christ, I did not believe the Bible was true. I doubted whether God, Satan, heaven, or hell even existed. I believed that we were born, lived so many years, and then died. I had my own business and thought that I had succeeded by my own wits. One evening, my wife and I heard some documentation that these were the last days before Jesus Christ would actually return. Not wanting to hear it, I almost walked out. Something kept me there, and I listened but was not convinced; however, I decided to do some research to find out if the Bible was really true. Indeed, if I could find one contradiction or anything that was not true, then I could disregard it. I believed this would not take long. This led me into much research. I learned nearly one-third of the Bible is, directly or indirectly, related to prophecy, which includes about 10,000 prophecies. One thing needed was to determine when the Bible was actually written. Thus, a study of biblical history, various translations, and archaeology was necessary. The Dead Sea Scrolls, which were found in Israel, contained parts of the Old Testament, including prophecies of the coming of Jesus. It has been proven that these were written before Christ came. Thousands of clay tablets and archaeological sites also confirm many accounts in the Bible. I took time off and began studying the prophecies. My wife would spend much time at the library. She obtained documentation for me from reference books, which I would check against the Scriptures to see if the prophecies took place. One week went by and then a month. Every prophecy that we were able to get information on proved to be accurate. I was astonished, but still not convinced. Later, there were people who would show me what appeared to be contradictions in the Bible. These were not contradictions, but only a lack of research on the part of those that said these things. Stubborn, that's me. Even after four months of intensive study, proving prophecy after prophecy was true, I was still skeptical. Four months turned into six. I became more determined. It wasn't possible that the sixty-six books of the Bible, written by many people over hundreds of years, would not have some errors, I thought. Thousands of prophecies and every one perfect? No, impossible! If I would admit that, then I would also have to admit there was a God. I was not prepared to do that—yet, I wanted to know the truth. More months passed. Finally, I had to admit after spending almost countless hours of research—I was wrong. I may have been the biggest skeptic in the world, but now I know—the Bible is true and is the perfect Word of God. Anyone willing to take the time I did and do the same research could only come to the same conclusion, if they are honest with themselves. I became afraid that I would perish. I surrendered my life to Jesus Christ, the only begotten Son of God, as a result of His love, compassion, mercy and grace. I know that there is none other name under heaven given among men whereby we MUST be saved (EXCEPT JESUS)-ref Acts 4:12. I REPENTED of my sins and received Jesus Christ as my only hope of salvation by FAITH-ref Eph 2:8-10. It is written, EXCEPT YE BE CONVERTED, AND BECOME AS LITTLE CHILDREN, YE SHALL NOT ENTER THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN-Mt 18:3. You can also call on Jesus NOW to be YOUR Lord and Savior.
It's always been a fantasy of mine to be a sex slave for 2 bears, male and female, pleasing the male when she's tired, and vice versa. Slowly sliding my lips up and down his thick shaft, tasting his pre-cum on my tongue. Once he's had enough of that, he rolls over onto his back, lifting me up as though I weighed nothing. Gently placing me on his cock, I guide him in, feeling him stretch me wide open. I moan with pleasure, feeling him fill me up. He growls softly, I feel it rumble deep in his chest, vibrating all the way down his body and through mine. He continues to lift me up and then pull me down. He's doing all the work for me, it feels so good, the warmth of the fur, his paws either side of my waist. He is in total control, I'm just nothing compared to his vast size and strength, but I have total trust in him, I know he won't hurt me. I feel the pace quicken, almost imperceptibly.
I slowly stroke myself, feeling myself nearing the point of no return coming closer with every stroke. I can hear the growl getting louder now; he speeds up even more, forcing me further and further down onto his thick cock. If it wasn't for the fact I my body is releasing so many endorphines, I would probably be screaming in agony. Except I am panting and whining, just like a bitch, begging her mate to fill her up. His claws dig in deeper, the pain, its excsquisite. It sends me over the edge. My head goes back, I let out a short grunt, I feel my cock explode, covering his chest fur in my seed. I keep stroking, it looks as though I'm trying to rip my cock out. I let out another grunt, another torrent flows forth, then another and another. A drop lands on the beasts muzzle. He seems confused for a moment. That's what I think. He digs his paws in even harder now and slams me onto his cock, I feel his grumble turn into a roar. He's cumming, oh my god. I can feel in, filling me up.
It's undescribable. He's mating with me, he's claimed me. I feel him slow, his cock still throbbing within me, it seems as though there's no more room for his cum. It's dripping out of me, onto his fur. I reach down, and then bring my hand up, tasting him. It's more than I ever expected. It's heaven.
As an enlightened, modern parent, I try to be as involved as possible in the lives of my six children. I encourage them to join team sports. I attend their teen parties with them to ensure no drinking or alcohol is on the premises. I keep a fatherly eye on the CDs they listen to and the shows they watch, the company they keep and the books they read. You could say I'm a model parent. My children have never failed to make me proud, and I can say without the slightest embellishment that I have the finest family in the USA.
Two years ago, my wife Carol and I decided that our children's education would not be complete without some grounding in modern computers. To this end, we bought our children a brand new Compaq to learn with. The kids had a lot of fun using the handful of application programs we'd bought, such as Adobe's Photoshop and Microsoft's Word, and my wife and I were pleased that our gift was received so well. Our son Peter was most entranced by the device, and became quite a pro at surfing the net. When Peter began to spend whole days on the machine, I became concerned, but Carol advised me to calm down, and that it was only a passing phase. I was content to bow to her experience as a mother, until our youngest daughter, Cindy, charged into the living room one night to blurt out: "Peter is a computer hacker!"
As you can imagine, I was amazed. A computer hacker in my own house! I began to monitor my son's habits, to make certain that Cindy wasn't just telling stories, as she is prone to doing at times.
After a few days of investigation, and some research into computer hacking, I confronted Peter with the evidence. I'm afraid to say, this was the only time I have ever been truly disappointed in one of my children. We raised them to be honest and to have integrity, and Peter betrayed the principles we tried to encourage in him, when he refused point blank to admit to his activities. His denials continued for hours, and in the end, I was left with no choice but to ban him from using the computer until he is old enough to be responsible for his actions.
After going through this ordeal with my own family, I was left pondering how I could best help others in similar situations. I'd gained a lot of knowledge over those few days regarding hackers. It's only right that I provide that information to other parents, in the hope that they will be able to tell if their children are being drawn into the world of hacking. Perhaps other parents will be able to steer their sons back onto the straight and narrow before extreme measures need to be employed.
To this end, I have decided to publish the top ten signs that your son is a hacker. I advise any parents to read this list carefully and if their son matches the profile, they should take action. A smart parent will first try to reason with their son, before resorting to groundings, or even spanking. I pride myself that I have never had to spank a child, and I hope this guide will help other parents to put a halt to their son's misbehaviour before a spanking becomes necessary.
1. Has your son asked you to change ISPs?
Most American families use trusted and responsible Internet Service Providers, such as AOL. These providers have a strict "No Hacking" policy, and take careful measures to ensure that your internet experience is enjoyable, educational and above all legal. If your child is becoming a hacker, one of his first steps will be to request a change to a more hacker friendly provider.
I would advise all parents to refuse this request. One of the reasons your son is interested in switching providers is to get away from AOL's child safety filter. This filter is vital to any parent who wants his son to enjoy the internet without the endangering him through exposure to "adult" content. It is best to stick with the protection AOL provides, rather than using a home-based solution. If your son is becoming a hacker, he will be able to circumvent any home-based measures with surprising ease, using information gleaned from various hacker sites.
2. Are you finding programs on your computer that you don't remember installing?
Your son will probably try to install some hacker software. He may attempt to conceal the presence of the software in some way, but you can usually find any new programs by reading through the programs listed under "Install/Remove Programs" in your control panel. Popular hacker software includes "Comet Cursor", "Bonzi Buddy" and "Flash".
The best option is to confront your son with the evidence, and force him to remove the offending programs. He will probably try to install the software again, but you will be able to tell that this is happening, if your machine offers to "download" one of the hacker applications. If this happens, it is time to give your son a stern talking to, and possibly consider punishing him with a grounding.
3. Has your child asked for new hardware?
Computer hackers are often limited by conventional computer hardware. They may request "faster" video cards, and larger hard drives, or even more memory. If your son starts requesting these devices, it is possible that he has a legitimate need. You can best ensure that you are buying legal, trustworthy hardware by only buying replacement parts from your computer's manufacturer.
If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips. They use child labor extensively in their third world sweatshops, and they deliberately disable the security features that American processor makers, such as Intel, use to prevent hacking. AMD chips are never sold in stores, and you will most likely be told that you have to order them from internet sites. Do not buy this chip! This is one request that you must refuse your son, if you are to have any hope of raising him well.
4. Does your child read hacking manuals?
If you pay close attention to your son's reading habits, as I do, you will be able to determine a great deal about his opinions and hobbies. Children are at their most impressionable in the teenage years. Any father who has had a seventeen year old daughter attempt to sneak out on a date wearing make up and perfume is well aware of the effect that improper influences can have on inexperienced minds.
There are, unfortunately, many hacking manuals available in bookshops today. A few titles to be on the lookout for are: "Snow Crash" and "Cryptonomicon" by Neal Stephenson; "Neuromancer" by William Gibson; "Programming with Perl" by Timothy O'Reilly; "Geeks" by Jon Katz; "The Hacker Crackdown" by Bruce Sterling; "Microserfs" by Douglas Coupland; "Hackers" by Steven Levy; and "The Cathedral and the Bazaar" by Eric S. Raymond.
If you find any of these hacking manuals in your child's possession, confiscate them immediately. You should also petition local booksellers to remove these titles from their shelves. You may meet with some resistance at first, but even booksellers have to bow to community pressure.
5. How much time does your child spend using the computer each day?
If your son spends more than thirty minutes each day on the computer, he may be using it to DOS other peoples sites. DOSing involves gaining access to the "command prompt" on other people's machines, and using it to tie up vital internet services. This can take up to eight hours. If your son is doing this, he is breaking the law, and you should stop him immediately. The safest policy is to limit your children's access to the computer to a maximum of forty-five minutes each day.
6. Does your son use Quake?
Quake is an online virtual reality used by hackers. It is a popular meeting place and training ground, where they discuss hacking and train in the use of various firearms. Many hackers develop anti-social tendencies due to the use of this virtual world, and it may cause erratic behaviour at home and at school.
If your son is using Quake, you should make hime understand that this is not acceptable to you. You should ensure all the firearms in your house are carefully locked away, and have trigger locks installed. You should also bring your concerns to the attention of his school.
7. Is your son becoming argumentative and surly in his social behaviour?
As a child enters the electronic world of hacking, he may become disaffected with the real world. He may lose the ability to control his actions, or judge the rightness or wrongness of a course of behaviour. This will manifest itself soonest in the way he treats others. Those whom he disagrees with will be met with scorn, bitterness, and even foul language. He may utter threats of violence of a real or electronic nature.
Even when confronted, your son will probably find it difficult to talk about this problem to you. He will probably claim that there is no problem, and that you are imagining things. He may tell you that it is you who has the problem, and you should "back off" and "stop smothering him." Do not allow yourself to be deceived. You are the only chance your son has, even if he doesn't understand the situation he is in. Keep trying to get through to him, no matter how much he retreats into himself.
8. Is your son obsessed with "Lunix"?
BSD, Lunix, Debian and Mandrake are all versions of an illegal hacker operation system, invented by a Soviet computer hacker named Linyos Torovoltos, before the Russians lost the Cold War. It is based on a program called "xenix", which was written by Microsoft for the US government. These programs are used by hackers to break into other people's computer systems to steal credit card numbers. They may also be used to break into people's stereos to steal their music, using the "mp3" program. Torovoltos is a notorious hacker, responsible for writing many hacker programs, such as "telnet", which is used by hackers to connect to machines on the internet without using a telephone.
Your son may try to install "lunix" on your hard drive. If he is careful, you may not notice its presence, however, lunix is a capricious beast, and if handled incorrectly, your son may damage your computer, and even break it completely by deleting Windows, at which point you will have to have your computer repaired by a professional.
If you see the word "LILO" during your windows startup (just after you turn the machine on), your son has installed lunix. In order to get rid of it, you will have to send your computer back to the manufacturer, and have them fit a new hard drive. Lunix is extremely dangerous software, and cannot be removed without destroying part of your hard disk surface.
9. Has your son radically changed his appearance?
If your son has undergone a sudden change in his style of dress, you may have a hacker on your hands. Hackers tend to dress in bright, day-glo colors. They may wear baggy pants, bright colored shirts and spiky hair dyed in bright colors to match their clothes. They may take to carrying "glow-sticks" and some wear pacifiers around their necks. (I have no idea why they do this) There are many such hackers in schools today, and your son may have started to associate with them. If you notice that your son's group of friends includes people dressed like this, it is time to think about a severe curfew, to protect him from dangerous influences.
10. Is your son struggling academically?
If your son is failing courses in school, or performing poorly on sports teams, he may be involved in a hacking group, such as the infamous "Otaku" hacker association. Excessive time spent on the computer, communicating with his fellow hackers may cause temporary damage to the eyes and brain, from the electromagnetic radiation. This will cause his marks to slip dramatically, particularly in difficult subjects such as Math, and Chemistry. In extreme cases, over-exposure to computer radiation can cause schizophrenia, meningitis and other psychological diseases. Also, the reduction in exercise may cause him to lose muscle mass, and even to start gaining weight. For the sake of your child's mental and physical health, you must put a stop to his hacking, and limit his computer time drastically.
I encourage all parents to read through this guide carefully. Your child's future may depend upon it. Hacking is an illegal and dangerous activity, that may land your child in prison, and tear your family apart. It cannot be taken too seriously.
What makes Yukari so endearing to the Hikikomori? The fact that she's one of the Quater Lifers who lives at home, does a begrudingly shitty job at work, and leads a carefree if obliviating existence.
That makes her Hikikomori-Sexy. Why? Because of the self destructive potential of it all...
A night with Yukari could be a night of excess...drinking, cussing, fucking, and a morning of no regrets. An empty morning, but one with no regrets. No kids, no settling down, no ruts. Just marching lockstep into her 30s with no real stable life plan other than just keeping up with the status quo. However long it may last. The last episode was damning in and of itself...the girls graduated but to Yukari...just another day. Three Years of memories...and...hey; see ya, good bye, so long and thanks for all the fish.
The nihilism of the 20s...the dawning of the 30s....This is sexy to a Hikikomori, especially one of self imposed exile. The horrors of war, the smell of cordite and rotting flesh, the feel of talcum sand...enough to drive any man to isolation, but for Yukari I'd certainly slap on some Pomeade, put on my cleanest AC-LIGHTNING BOLT-DC t-shirt and least wrinkled slacks for Miss Yukari.
My friends, it has often been said that I like flat chests. Friends, I like flat chests. No, friends, I love flat chests! I love boards. I love pancakes. I love pert nipples. I love fried eggs, mosquito bites, I love itty-bitty kitty titties, and lolis.
Flat chests in one-pieces, in two-pieces, in uniforms, in gym clothes, in training bras, through wet t-shirts, on the bed, in nothing at all, I love every kind of flat chest that can occur upon this earth. I love rubbing their smooth skin with delicate hands that make little girls blush across their faces. My heart leaps with joy whenever shirts are tossed high into the air and their bodies able to be seen by my near-sighted eyes. And there is nothing like using my fingers to massage their hard nipples. And the feeling that comes when their hips move on their own, is such an exquisite feeling. Like when ranks of elementary students branding their bloomers rushing into a jog. It moves me deep within my heart to watch a little girl running laps over and over as her clothes stick to her sweaty body. The sight of clothes being strung up to dry is an irresistible pleasure. And there is nothing more arousing, than the sounds made by their showerheads, rushing water over their glistening upper torsos! When a band of pitiful grown women make their final stands with nothing but their bra size, only to have their hope smashed to atoms piece by piece by a flat chest's adorableness, I'm in ecstasy. I love it when my nutbladders are massaged by a prepubescant girl. It's so invigorating to see such young girls unable to properly handle a phallus, that they have never seen before, being tossed to bed, cumming even though it's their first time, and creampied. I love to be squashed under the bodies of the elementary and middleschool female student body. The pleasure, as they crawl around on my body, rubbing themselves against me.
Oh those stitches, I have stitches like that but on my penis, it is from circumcision.
Your body is supposed to absorb them but the threads refused to fuse with my penis, so stitches had to be removed manually by the doctor.
The wounds have healed but it stitches left behind holes where they used to be. Think of ear piercing if you will, but like 10 of them and they are on my penis.
The dirt and sweat accumulate throughout my daily activities and once in a while I have to remove them. I do this by squeezing the pimple/ochinchin-cheese-like filth out of me.
So what I want to ask you is, WOULD YOU PLEASE SUCK IT?
OK so its really late, like 5:45~ and i didn't plan on fapping tonight because i was just going to play some tf2 and record some demos etc, and then go to sleep, and i see this thing about Zach Roloff dying etc so i stay on /b/, and then i see this thread. the borderline CP pic thread that just got 404d.
now, i normally lock my door when i fap, whoever is trying to open my door probably knows what I'm doing but for the sake of decency nobody says anything, just, what are you doing? oh i forgot i locked the door sorry. yea I'm going to bed soon. OK goodnight.
anyways, i have my hands down my pants reading these threads and i start to get a boner. so I get into the fapping mood and pull my dick out and lube it up with some good ol' spit. before long i stop and think holy shit, what am i doing? if i cum right now what am i going to clean it up with? gotta get some toilet paper. so i get up and get some toilet paper from my bathroom. dick is still slightly hard so i get back and f5, start fapping to new pictures.
and then, my little sister from behind me. i forgot to lock my bathroom door. holy shit. my bathroom is connected to my room, and also leads out into a small hallway with another bedroom (my 11y/o sister)
im fapping furiously and looking at borderline CP and my 11 year old sister has caught me. "what are you doing?" has she seen my dick? does she even know what fapping is? go to sleep Sarah its 5am "what are you doing?" again. she comes around and looks, and that's where i fucked up again. i didn't even bother to cover my dick. almost like i wanted her to see it, i wanted her to discover my cock and be curious and a little aroused, but she wasn't. she gasped and almost screamed, and i instantly regretted not pulling my pants up. i told her to go to sleep and she just left the room.
i think i hear my parents talking, but im not sure. im hoping that she just falls asleep and dismisses this as a terrible dream...
Touhous as far as the eye can see. A delicately intertwined network of Touhous stretches out to the horizon, bathed in spring light... sunrise on Infinite Gensokyo.
The planet's surface is clothed in a flowing sheet of youkai. Tengu shadows blot out the land. Maybe the Touhous are the land. It's been millennia since any human has set foot on Infinite Gensokyo.
It's a calm, clear day. The sun lends a reddish hue to the skin of loli vampires. A few clouds drift aimlessly through the sky's blue expanse - but wait! Those are no clouds! Bubbly puffs of fuzz and fur, catgirl cumulonimbus. Levitating fairies waft through the heavens like helicopters, fluttering their wings to propel themselves. Anything is possible on Infinite Gensokyo.
How many Touhous are there? No one knows. The Touhous move as a single entity; the world's cutest bacterial colony. At some points they seem to blend into each other and blur together to create a semi-corporeal Touhoublob with tube legs and sausage hands jutting out haphazardly. Amorphous splotches of silly hats and frilly dresses, they are almost unidentifiable but still retain some characteristics of Touhouishness. This curious amoeba trudges whimsically on, skirts whipped by the breeze, across the sweeping plains of Infinite Gensokyo.
There are no gaps in the Touhou chain. What happens when a Touhou dies? Is a new one born to take its place? Perhaps there is no death on Infinite Gensokyo. All Touhous live forever. All Touhous go to heaven.
So there I was, sitting on the bus, one hand subtly twitching my dick via my pocket, to convince it to hold back the lakes of urine that were rapidly building up in my bladder following my trip to the pub.
Finally, the bus reached the stop outside my house. I ran off, hand still in pocket with the other scrabbing for my keys. I burst through the front door and ran up the stairs, heading straight for the bathroom.
I began to unzip .. but then thought, why bother? Instead, I kicked off my shoes, stood in the bath and let the torrents of piss empty into my pants. The hot streams trickled furiously down my legs, wetting my socks and making a pool of light yellow liquid at my feet.
After the last few drops escaped from my relieved penis, I stripped nude, sat in my pool of piss and masturbated to completion, letting spurts of cum shoot up over my chest and hand, and slowly run down to the pisspool, juices mingling with each other.
Programming is boring and demeaning, everyone wants to go drinking after work, weed cost to much, sex is gross, computer takes forever to compile, suicide nets outside windows, music isn't interesting, have to ride the bus like a poor person, teleconferencing with foreigners, no good restaurants close enough to have lunch at, performance evaluations based on lines of code, stuck on /prog/ at three in the morning, vending machine won't accept bills, too many niggers, mixed agile with waterfall, impromptu speech at meeting, unpaid overtime, SVN repository corrupt, took my red stapler, change orders, stupid security measures, MSDN subscriptions, comment quotas, refactoring code from 2003, office politics, going to a family function at parent's house, wasted sick days just to sleep in, dress codes, tax office doesn't accept Visa debit, rent just got raised, people drinking energy drinks, paperwork, internet filter, people take five thousand items to the express lane, having to show ID to buy liquor, office slut gossip, uncomfortable chair, consultants, slogan posters everywhere, janitor didn't empty the trashcan, light is too bright, two week waiting period to buy a gun, cat left a dead bird in the bed, pen is out of ink, makefiles, asshole stole your bagged lunch, holiday parties, pair programming with a faggot, having to share a secretary, scripting languages, endless manuals and tech documents, beard is itchy, had a bad dream, water has something floating in it, endless talk about pitiful poor people, lighter is out of fluid, shift key going out, little girls being sexy and having to avoid them, someone brought a store-brand soda, coin counter counted a dime as a penny, mouse laser shines in your eye, television infomercials, old people who refuse to retire or die, Taco Bell makes you shit blood, got a speeding ticket in the mail, batteries went dead, candle burned out, drug dealer won't call back, someone broke the build, everything is virtualized, high blood pressure, torrent has zero seeds, left something across the room before you sat down, waitress won't refill your fucking drink, printer out of toner, got a cavity, spilled the ashtray, out of sleeping pills, air conditioner is shitty, women trying to force conversation and not accepting `fuck off' for an answer, complete multivitamin isn't all that complete, considered bad form to drink mouthwash, Windows 8, cubicles, being called `Mister', got a headache, holes in clothes, circular dependencies, autocomplete, reimaging, fork is slightly bent, someone pealed the stickers off the Rubik's Cube, temp workers, gum under the table, dogs barking, knife isn't sharp enough, public intoxication laws, things take too long to ship from Japan, Red Hat Linux, tech support contractors, ate the ice cream too fast, got into a political argument with an idiot, exposed nail under desk, scratched the front of your Rolex watch, not enough cabinet space, florescent lighting hurts your eyes, password complexity requirements with no basis in reality, flowers in window all died, 401k is poorly managed, fell asleep with a lit cigarette in hand, etc....
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 20:39
Marry cute young female children. Deuteronomy 22 28-29 in hebrew allows this.
How a life can change in an instant. Everything one thought and believed can be shattered on the rocks of an uncharted coast of a new experience. Here I was, a happy English teacher, twenty-five years old with a lovely wife and a five-year old daughter. I was teaching in a good urban school, considered something of a boy-genius by my colleagues, respected by parents, and loved by most of my students. And then one fateful day, everything changed because of Jesse Coulter.
It was right after school, and I was seated at my desk correcting some papers when I noticed his lanky sixteen year old form standing before me. Jesse and I had not gotten along, did not get along well at all. That's because he was a very lazy teenage boy. He got through high school thus far on his basketball skills, and most other teachers seemed to turn a blind eye on the fact that he was charming them with his skill on the court and his million dollar smile. He didn't like English Class. I guess it clashed with his "street jargon."
Hell, he didn't like schoolwork of any kind. What he did like was fucking every girl he could get his large black hands on. And from what I heard around school, it wasn't just large black hands that won the young white girls over. Talk was he was endowed like a horse.
I mean, I knew several teachers who visited the boys' locker room just to verify the rumor. These were straight teachers. And the report they gave was that the rumor was correct. The handsome black boy got on well with other students, but they all treated him with some kind of special respect, like he was untouchable, above them in some way. In the lunch room for example, when he came to a table, other kids would move aside, or even leave if he told them to.
Now, handsome, black, Jesse Coulter stood before my desk. He should have been playing basketball, and I was the reason he wasn't.
"You get me benched?" He asked with a thick, husky, masculine voice.
"No Jesse, you got yourself benched. You didn't hand in the last two homework assignments, and you failed the last three tests."
He stood up talker, straightening his shoulders which usually slouched. "I been busy."
I looked uip at him. He was handsome, I had to say that for him. So dark with flashing teeth.
"Too busy to do your schoolwork? Then maybe you need a break from basketball."
"You know the school never go for that. I the star of the school."
"Not this week. Not until you get those assignments in and do better on the check tests."
"Fuck that."
I snapped up. I could feel the heat of anger rising from my reddening face.
"Don't you speak that way to me!"
Suddenly I was standing in front of him. I could smell his musk. He was about my height, but only sixteen. His strong face had an arrogance about it that was intimidating.
"Look, teach, how the fuck can I take time out to study, when I got to play basketball and fuck half the white pussy in the school?"
I was speechless. I just stood there.
"An, then there's all them female teachers in the school like Miss Mortenson who need my big black dick. And all them faggot teachers too."
"That is enough. I want you out of here and down to the office. Now!"
His eyes burned cold, the white around the cornea clear and ivory.
"Listen, Asswipe. You think I gonna let one cocksucking teacher fuck up my position here at the school? Shit, I already offered two scholarships to good colleges, and I only a sophomore. You the one who is gonna get on board here and learn some respect for a black star like me!"
And with that, he slapped me. He drew back one large black hand and slapped my face, hard. My head spun. I had never experienced anything like it in my life. I grant you, I am not a very physical person, although I do swim at the gym to keep a fairly good body. I am not into sports, and prefer Faulkner to Football. And this teenage black boy had just slapped me. I reached out to grab a fistful of his t-shirt, but he slapped my hands away as easily as swatting a fly. Then he grabbed my jaw in one large hand.
"We gonna do some extra-curricular work here with me as the teacher and you as the student. We gonna teach you how to respect the black man!" He almost lifted me off the floor by the one hand on my face. Then with his other hand he grabbed my crotch. He grabbed my balls.
"Shit, don't feel like you got much down here. Like most white boys, all talk and no fuck! How the fuck do you please your wife? Suck pussy all the time?" He squeezed harder and harder, until I was sure I was ruined for life and the room began to spin around me. Then he dropped me to the floor. I heard it before I saw anything. I heard him lower the zipper on his baggy jeans.
This could not be happening. There had been something in between I missed. Some gap in events that explained all of this. I was on the floor, my necktie twisted around my shoulder, my trousers wrinkled, and my balls throbbing and sending shooting pain up through my body.
I was looking up at a tall, lanky, punk of a nigger who was unzipping his pants. I use that word carefully. I know its full destructive power. To me, at that moment, Jesse Coulter descended from an African American to a Nigger. But I didn't have time to feel proud of my linguistic decision. I tried to scramble away, but he placed one large size thirteen tennis shoe on my body to hold me still.
"You know my record here at the school?" He asked, smiling and fishing in his open fly. "You know I already fucked six little white sluts pregnant?" I couldn't believe that was trueÃffÃÃfæsurly the school wouldn't hide such a thing just to keep us number one in basketball? Would they? "I gonna show you what they all love. Why they keep coming back for more. Why Mr. Hample and Mr. Louis drool every time I walk past.
He grew frustrated trying to fish his prick out of his baggy pants, so he cursed and ripped open the waist button and let pants and boxer shorts drop to the floor.
I have to say, I have never seen anything like it on man or boy. I've heard that there are photos of such things on the internet, but I don't go to those places. Jesse Coulter stood there with his pants puddle around his feet, and my lying between his spread legs. Over me hung the largest dick I have ever seen in my life. Mine is six inches hard, and I have been told that is average, for a white guy anyway. This dick wasn't even hard and must have hung eight inches. It was as thick as a beer can. And under it hung two low slung balls, each one the size of a hard boiled egg. It was freakish. No woman could ever even take such a prick, I felt certain.
"You gonna like this dick, Mr. Sutton. You gonna learn to love it a whole lot. When I finish with you, you gonna give me an A in English, just because you love this dick so much. You gonna want my dick more than your wife's pussy. You gonna want it like a heroin addict needs a fix. You gonna be nigger dick crazy!"
His talk was crazy! But I was in no position to argue. I had always been completely straight, never ever entertaining gay or bisexual thoughts. I was open minded about gays and believed in gay rights, but I was not gay.
He sat down on my chest, and his fat prick dragged across my shirtfront, leaking something from the puckered foreskin onto me. The shaft of the nigger prick was thick and wrinkled and the foreskin long completely closing over the cockhead. The puckered foreskin flesh at the tip looked like an asshole or something. The he pumped the gigantic hunk of fuckmeat and the foreskin drew back over the huge purple cockhead. It looked the size of a plum with a wide pisshole leaking pre cum. I was in shock.
The nigger cock grew to almost a foot in length. It was the most awesome thing I have ever seen in my life. He started to rub the leaking dickhead all over my face. I tried to turn my head away, but he slapped the fuck out of me, until I lay still and just let him play with my face.
"I gonna mark you, like an animal marks his territory. You never gonna get the smell of my dick off yo face. You gonna smell my cocksnot all the time, even when you fucking that bitch of yo's." He covered my entire face with pre cum! My nose and eyes and lips. I started to gag and he slapped me again. Hard.
"You never show disrespect to a black man's cock. You always welcome it, no matter who the black man is. You got that, Cuntface?" He made a fist and would have punched me right in the face if I hadn't agreed. Then he told me to open my mouth. I knew what was coming and that it would change my life forever. I opened my mouth. He yelled for me to open it wider. I did and he rested his enormous purple dickhead on my lower lip. It dribbled cockslop into my mouth like a leaking faucet. "I gonna fuck yo ass of course, but not till later in the week. You my bitch now, and you keep your asspussy and mouth available for me any time, night or day. But I ain't got time today, cause I gots to go to basketball practice. And I going, ain't I? He lifted his huge dick and started to slap my face with it. Pre- fuck sprayed the area around my face. My lips were sticky with his pre-cum. His dick was like a giant club and it hurt badly when it thunked into my face.
"Yes! Yes!" I cried. "You can go, just leave me alone."
"Leave you alone? No way, girlyboy. You is my ho now. I gots lots of fun stuff planned fo you and me. But fo now, I just gonna blow some nice nigger sperm into your mouth and you gonna swallow like a nice cockhog." I was crying pretty heavily now and trying to tell him I wasn't gay, and please don't do this to me, but it was already too late. He had his dick in my mouth and was fucking my face like it was a young white virgin cunt.
He humped my face, leaning his body up and over my head, slamming balls deep so his big nuts thumped on me. His legs stretched and I raised one hand to his large muscular tight globular ass. His ass skin was smooth and I felt the deep ass crack. He grunted and pushed more and more dick into my face. Now it was lodged in my throat, stretching and ripping at my throat muscles. I could not breath. I was sure I would die. The cock was down twelve inches into my gullet.
How could any girl take this? I wondered. The pain was horrible, but the humiliation worse. The prick expanded and throbbed and I felt it moving in my neck. I put one hand to my neck and actually felt the big nigger dick from the outside of my neck. His pubic hair was thick and stank of sweat and black boy sexual smell. I was being face fucked by a sixteen year old nigger and couldn't do anything about it. Jesus, what was happening to me and what would become of my life?
Then he came! It seemed like gallons of thick white nigger sperm. It poured down my throat like glue, then he pulled back and it filled my mouth. It felt like wallpaper paste or oatmeal. It backed up into my nasal passages and I started to snort nigger cum.
He laughed and pulled out and shot three more spurts of dicksnot all over my face. Then he milked the dick of the last drops of his cock cream and wiped his dickhead in my hair. He leaned down over me smiling and then spit three huge gobs right into my face.
"We will continue this tomorrow. Don't try to skip school, or tell anyone about us, or you will be very sorry. I got lots of friends who are a whole lot rougher than me."
He stood up and stuffed his black hose back into his pants which he pulled up and buttoned.
"I gotta go to practice now. And I bet I get an A on the quiz tomorrow, huh?"
He put one large foot on my face and pressed down, almost breaking my nose.
"Say hello to yo pretty wife for me. Oh and tomorrow, don't wear any underwear under your pants. It will save time."
Ruby has a life outside the internet, while Python can't go six hours without playing Call of Duty and geting called a faggot by preteen boys on XBox Live. Ruby teaches gym class and lets you smoke under the bleachers, while Java teaches third-grade english and makes you read aloud in class. Ruby has the ability to empathize with others, while Clojure has over two terabytes of child porn. Ruby is healthy and stong, while Perl has AIDS and needs life support machines to keep him breathing. Ruby sometimes enjoys weed, while Common Lisp sucked off a nigger for a single crack rock. Ruby loves animal and treasures the companionship, while Haskell ran over your dog and made you clean up the mess. Ruby has a vast collection of anime stored on his hard drive, while Smalltalk streams anime and buys the DVDs. Ruby is financially secure and has invested his money wisely, while C++ is always trying to borrow money to buy real estate on the moon. Ruby respects people's personal space, while Fortran gets six inches from your face and spits when he talks. Ruby can agree to disagree, while Scheme wants to behead those who insult Islam. Ruby never hits on your girlfriend, while BASIC molests your children. Ruby has a good job and good mental health, while Symta lives with his mother and spends 18 hours a day shitposting on obscure forums in a foreign language. Ruby is clean and neat, while Lua leaves his trash in your car whenever you take him somewhere. Ruby was voted `Most Likely To Succeed' in high school, while Scala took a gun to school and shot the place up. Ruby cares about a friend's safety, while PHP secretly laced your weed with PCP then called the cops on you. Ruby knows that Jews are evil, while C# is a jew himself. Ruby served nine tours of duty in six different wars, while F# dodge the draft and moved to Canada. Ruby plays the Touhou as Marisa when she's available, while Go won't play at all if he can't play as Reimu. Ruby is learning Japanese to translate visual novels for others, while Javascript is learning Japanese so he can read hentai by himself. Ruby accepts the fact that programming is demeaning, while OCaml also agrees that programming is demeaning. Ruby takes care to not break your stuff, while Pascal clumsily dropped super glue on your carpet. Ruby gets laid with a new girl every night, while C cries while masturbating herself to sleep. Ruby offers you the last piece of food, while Ada orders a bunch of appetizers then eats most of them but still wants to divide the check evenly. Ruby recognizes that magic may exist and understands it's appeal, while Scheme emotionally argued for Small Bomb Theory for hours on end. Ruby is the model Aryan to carry on the Human Race, while Game Maker Language has 24 chromosomes. Ruby is a well mannered drinker, while Assembly thought it would be funny to take a shit in the sink. Ruby values functionality over form, while Forth is an art major who loudly complains about `conformist' with his hipster friends in Starbucks. Ruby can function in almost any environment, while Verilog thinks the Sun is going to eat him and refuses to go outside. Ruby knows when and how to tell a good story, while Tcl talks about 4chan and lolies at parties that he got a pity invite to.
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 20:40
If programming languages were... Sailor Senshi!
C - Sailor Moon. The language that everything ultimately revolves around and whenever caught in a pinch, reveals plot defying secret moves that solves everything, yet sets the stage for an even more powerful enemy later. Other Sailors have complex feelings towards her, because she is childish and whimsical, and is more caught up in romance than her royal responsibilities, and she is a bit of a crybaby.
Javascript - Sailor Chibi-moon. She is Sailor Moon's daughter from a thousand years in the future. She powers up her mother, but her power is quite limited on her own. Whenever she's in a bad situation, she cries, and a huge amount of destructive energy that can be seen from miles away, and is hard to calm down. She has more pantyshots than all of the other characters combined, but this is mostly used for comedic effect. She can also travel through time, has a crush on her father, and is sorely lacking in erodoujin.
LISP - Sailor Mercury. The intellectual of the group. She is smart and shy, and though everyone who knows her loves her, she has trouble making new friends. She can perform math that completely bypasses logic and can throw out a line of completely unintelligible nonsense to prove that she is right. She didn't have any offensive attacks for a long time, so her popularity suffered as she was deemed useless. This soon changed and she was given powers on par with the rest of the sailors, but some people never forgave her.
Pascal - Sailor Venus. A nice girl who is obsessed with idols and loves to sing and dance. She is very pretty, and strong -- on the rare occasion that someone has given her a proper plan. She was fighting evil on her own before meeting up with Sailor Moon and can be (poorly) disguised as Sailor Moon. She rarely makes good grades and is prone to taking advice from a cat. She is willing to change herself endlessly to please others, but is nevertheless doomed to never be loved.
Ruby - Sailor Jupiter. A tall tomboy who a bit clumsy. She is actually quite girly, but is embarrassed to admit this to anyone. Her dreams include being a good wife one day, but she is socially awkward and has had her heart broken before, so she is hesitant about romance again.
C++ - Sailor Mars. At heart, she is a nice girl, but she is quite quick to anger towards Sailor Moon's failings and is sometimes overly blunt. She is quite intelligent on her own, and can be quite elegant. She tries very hard at everything she does, and will try even harder to disguise the work she has put into something, so as to make it seem that things come easy for her.
Perl - Sailor Saturn. She is a frail girl, the daughter of a mad scientist who sold his soul to the devil for a chance to have a loli of his own. Because she is inhabited by the devil, two lesbians want to kill her, but Sailor Moon saves her and tells them to fuck off. Her powers are limited to either being useless or destroying an entire planet, killing herself in the process. She is good friends with Chibiusa.
Java - Tuxedo Kamen. Sailor Moon's love interest and future father of Chibiusa. He is as intelligent as Sailor Mercury, but never seems to apply it. He rarely cares enough to actually confront villains, but will save Sailor Moon when she is in trouble, which is always. However, he is prone to being brainwashed to attack her, and dying and being resurrected by plothacks. He has probably committed statutory rape against Sailor Moon.
Symta - Queen Beryl. A hateful cunt who uses her homosexual minions to steal the energy out of people, so that she can awake a monster, destroy everything that is good in the world, and begin her rein of darkness. She is in love with Tuxedo Kamen, so decides that the best way to win his heart is to destroy everything that he has ever loved. She is also quite ugly.
BASIC - Sailor Pluto. Her powers are a bit unknown, because she spends most of her time guarding a door that only Chibiusa uses, and that other might use, but don't have to achieve the same effect. She sometimes leaves this door guarded by a small kitten, so her functions must not be very important. Her core personality changes quite often and it appears that she cannot recognize her allies on sight.
Assembly – Sailor Galactica. She is the most powerful Soldier in the universe. She defeated the Chaos, an evil so pure that it could only appear in a children's show, by locking it in her body, causing her to become twisted and evil in the process. She is defeated by Sailor Moon, who used The Power of Friendship to exorcise the evil during the battle that had so much nudity that it caused the entire fifth season to not be licensed in North America.
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 20:40
have to ride the bus like a poor person,
You are a poor person.
But being someone's bitch is better than programming a libre videogame full of whatever you want.
For many years I have followed the path of destiny set forth from birth to death for every /prog/lodyte. I have studied the holy texts of SICP and stolen PDFs of TAoCP, I have even perused the heretical tomes of HtDP and The Ruby Way. I have spent many a night lying awake pondering the meaning of Satori. But for all of my efforts, I have gained nothing. Or perhaps that is wrong. I have not gained nothing. But the Philosophy rejects the material in favor of enlightenment, and in this I have experienced profound personal growth and deeper understanding of the Art. While I do not mean to say that this is worthless, it is objectively valueless. The world does not crave another infinite stream Fibonacci number generator. The Philosophy will not be advanced by yet another metacircular evaluator implementation. These things have exhausted their novelty. No further progress will be made while such ivory tower pursuits are made towards resolving such archaic problems. In short, the world has moved on.
Some of you will object that they are not obsolete, but timeless. That may indeed be true. I do not begrudge the old guard among us for trying to sustain our culture -- rather, I deeply honor them. But I must ask them to review the blood that has been shed in this losing battle. Our formerly esteemed colleague, Abelson-san, was himself turned on to the empty shallowness of the FOIC crowd, whose leader himself found receiving a copy of SICP to be an insult. Whether his defection was by force or by choice, the fact still stands that our Philosophy was not able to withstand the attacks. How much longer must we withstand this war of attrition? How long must we go hungry while watching the fools beyond the tower grow fat and gluttonous? The high priests will say that our reward lies in Satori. But what evidence is there of Satori? It cannot be touched nor seen. They do not even provide a reason for why it should be pursued, other than for it's own sake. For a while now I have considered the hypocrisy in their insistence on empiricism in all matters other than the axioms of the Philosophy. To even question this is apostasy. The closest validation provided is that all /prog/lodytes were born only to bask in awe of the universes that we create. What arrogance. What decides a man's future, his fate or his own decisions?
I can simply no longer reconcile the heresy that I have long held with my allowance of this movement of perpetual students into my heart. Thus, it is with great sadness that I here announce that I am quiting /prog/ forever (or at least until tomorrow). I am crying as I type this, but there is no turning back. I know that, if I could, I would return to be amongst all of you, my friends, so I took drastic measures to prevent this. Beginning at 8:00:00UTC this morning I have removed all things related to LISP on my system. Even eMacs had to go. In their place, I have installed the tools of the proletariat: PHP, SASS, Adobe Dreamweaver and, CoffeeScript. And to make this irreparable, I have burned my autographed copy of K&R C.
I am still not sure if I am but a wayward spirit who was offered a chance of enlightenment but failed to grasp it, or a human being who has finally awoken from dreams of Elysian fields to carve his own path in the world. I know that you will hate me, but I beg of you to please modernize the dogma so that the spirit of us will live on, even in some form.
Finally, please, friends, and enemies, do not think that I hate you. I love each and every one of you. I have merely grown dissatisfied with the Philosophies. Know that where ever I go and whatever I do, I will always carry a small piece of you all with me in my heart.
I got an .zip file as an email attachment this morning that was supposedly very important. I don't really care for things like that, so I spent a few hours fucking off online. I got a little bored arguing with people who are wrong, so decided that I better check out what it was. Whelp, I saved it to my files, but I have to use outlook for some reason (even though I could replace it if I so wished, I am the sysadmin after all), so it took a while, so I went back to playing minesweeper. After lunch, I thought that I'd better open that file. I started to open is, then went to browse /prog/, reddit, Hacker News, Slashdot, and /g/ for a while. 3 O'clock rolls around and I think to myself that I'd better get on that damn file. Oh great, it's a fucking PDF. I was surprised the idiot could figure out the windows archiving thing. Well, anyway, this is windows, so naturally Acrobat has to load, so I go read a bunch of wiki pages until 4:55. Then it is 4:56, then 4:57, then 4:58, then 4:59, then I once again remember that thing that I was supposed to read (or do something with), but hey, fuck it, it's almost 5:00. Then I go home. Maybe I'll get to it tomorrow, but then again, maybe not. I'm not a psychic. I'll be busy monitoring log files and making sure the servers are down. If I'm not busy watching them, the network could go down, and trillions of dollars could be lost. I'm sure whatever it is can wait.
Such is the hectic day of a sysadmin.
Name:
Anonymous2015-06-15 20:42
Marry cute young female children. Deuteronomy 22 28-29 in hebrew allows this.
Europe is sure to follow, as they implement (poorly) everything the merkan idiots do. The modern world is increasingly unsuited for the Jews. It is the nature of a parasite to destroy the host, and they have created the viciously brutal nigger race to suppress the goyim, but their plan has backfired. United States First Nigger has forgone even the notion of obedience to the kikes and has gone straight to the niggers for "advice". Why? Well, when is the last time a Jew outside of Israel was brave enough to kill someone because they looked at the wrong? Just like the rats they are, kikes are sneaky, but meek and weak. Niggers are armed and dangerous, and are a much more immediate threat. Soon the nigger leaders will claim to the kike leaders that slavery was worse than the holocaust and the niggers will rise and kill the international jew once and for all. But this is perhaps the worst outcome, because the jews, though slave masters, are mostly benelovent, where as niggers are stupid savages. Expect and entire world exactly like Africa until they get in a nuclear war over cocaine or something.
As a proud member of Anonymous working with other members in Anonymous with #OPInnocence #OPPedoHunt I report all threads that depict / and or otherwise sexualize children or show questionable content.
These threads and its content can be but are are not limited to 'Too Young For Those Tits (TYFTT), Too Young For That Ass (TYFTA), Pre-Teen & Teen (JB), Young Girls, Cute Little Girls, Young Candid, and this also includes such threads 'Bad Parenting, Creep shot, You Love You Loose, Guess Her Age, Nudism' as these can often be places where such violations are performed with pictures of underage girls and boys being posted.
We must also mention that threads/images that sexualize underage girls that are drawn, sketched, animated or crafted, (Known as Lolicon) are just as bad as the real thing and is also in violation of rules of not just 4chan but the Adam Walsh Act and the laws of the United States Of America (18+ Required Law) and Human Rights Act.
We in Legion thank the Janitors & Moderators of 4chan who listen to our reports and work with us along with the interception and help from the FBI, LEA, Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre (CEOP), New York Police Department, Google & Microsoft in working together to help stop child exploitation and abuse.
Remember, we must protect the children as they are our future - the future of Legion!
Never stop fighting the vile scum of this Earth such as pedophiles and child molestors!
We shutdown Freedom Hosting, OPVA, CPHeaven and many more deep web sites we can do even more!
If you help, support, produce, assist or in any other way endorse child sexual abuse we will find you.
We Are Anonymous We Do Not Forgive Child Molestors We Do Not Forget The Children That Have Suffered
I've been trolling the shit out of the local "sacred grove," a little market where all the wiccans and fake pagans and shit go to buy their myrhh and newt semen and other assorted crap.
My father used to be obsessed with this sort of thing, he had a falling out with Christianity, and his mother was a straight up backwoods witchdoctor who floated to this country from Haiti on a door. So pops, who was a successful businessman and by no means their usual clientele, would walk in and buy just mountains of paraphenalia and ingredients because he wanted to spend the weekend trying to kill his ex-wife with black magic or curse the Clinton administration or whatever.
I would always go with him because there was a Weinershnitzel next door and the chili cheeseburgers were great.
Well, eventually he realized that no number of dormouse feet burned in a bowl was going to kill mom, so he threw all the shit into the basement and converted to Islam instead. I kept going to the Weinershnitzel, because I liked the food, but I had already met all of the people at the grove, so I'd go there and hang out occasionally. They'd always ask what my dad was doing with all that shit, and I'd always tell them that he'd vanish into the hills behind the house for two days at a time, and then come back naked and pale and sleep for a day and a half.
I stopped going when I went to college, but I returned last month. I'd been doing research. I bought a quart of komodo dragon's blood, sacred chalk, clove oil, high-john the conquerer, gazelle horn and deer hoof. I asked for some advice on counter-deific magic, but of course I knew everything they had to say.
Then one of them asked what I was trying to do, and I said "I'm going to kill Resheph, so that the Red Veil may fall upon The Cradle."
I've been returning periodically to buy more blood, and insinuate that my efforts have been successful. I've been intentionally losing weight and not sleeping, as well.
All the shut-ins with their 'waifus'. Who think that 'normalfag' is a bad thing. Or think that when you call us 'normalfag', we're supposed to consider it an insult. 'Normalfag is a badge of honour for we who aren't - and never will - be like you.
Your butthurt is sweet nectar to we who have lives outside the door of that basement. Especially the fact that we 'normalfags' are here, and there's fuck all that you can do about it. We're here, we're normal, you're not.
BRAVO APPLAUSE! Said perfectly except for the Jews by our side part, cause frankly they were in cahoots with the slave trade as well, and today are using the USA as a puppet and Obama is falling for it. Everything u said was correct. I will say this though We need black cities, black police forces, free health and education, black employment. Theres enough money but the rich black sports stars and entertainers who the Jews control are run by their personal and selfish greed and no sense of community or self, they sell themselves for money and not for the betterment of the black race, this country could be ours rightfully so but there is no community or organization from the influential(meaning the ones who have the minds of the youth).
Trust there is enough money in America for there to be little or no poverty but we all know getting rid of Poverty is not on the list of this countries priorities because the USA profits off of poverty.
ello anonysan. While I do like sicp and things such as lazy streams, I do not insist that these are the only abstractions that should be used. One should be open to all ideas that they may come into contact with. One should have the freedom to adapt to a new scenario in each progressing moment on their path in life. Should a stick be found along the trial, it can be used to write in the dirt, to fashon a spear, or to start a fire. Should a stone be found instead, it may be used to hunt in combination with a sling. You do not know what objects will be found in the trail ahead, nor can you choose a path that will yield one object more than the other. The only thing that you can be sure of is you may find just about anything if you look for it while you walk, and just about anything could be of use.
As I enter the valley of darkness and find myself surrounded by XML parsers that run off of .NET, I remember my training. My lambda spear is still by my side, as I've carried it since the day I've found it. Right next to my C long sword, my bloody seeples chainsaw, my array of assembly throwing knives, the many things I've collected along my journey have stayed by my side as I confront new things, new challenges, new domains to explore. Within each challenge is a new skill to master. A foreign land awaiting exploration. An artifact waiting to be collected and wielded.
When my colleagues are blind in the dark valley, I pull back. I see the buggy XML parser and pull it back to it's mathematical form. My lambda spear emits a faint white glow, just powerful enough to illuminate the shape of the beast. Following the corners, it is rearranged. It's algebra is changed. I apply the endomorphism and permute its elements. The code is broken. Before my colleagues have found their bearings, the beast falls. I recompile. I push forward with the lambda spear and C# sprinkles down. It is a trivial compilation. One doesn't work statement to statement in an imperative language. They solve the problem at its most fundamental level. The light. The guidance of the lambda spear.
My colleagues do not know of the lambda spear. They have no interest in such an artifact and wonder why I carry the relic with me. But they don't question the solutions I propose. They think I posses talent. But I do not. I simply look, listen, and follow the light.
Illumination. You acquire a deep understanding of programming and transcend it, to the point you no longer need to program. Processes, or the definitions of processes, or the definitions of processes defining processes occur in your brain, not in a sequential manner, but all at once. You suddenly realize you know every possible process, and you are no longer interested in its results, so you stop programming and just meditate on the universal knowledge you forged. To procure food, you can do some menial work in inferior programming languages - you no longer care which - but in your spare time, you simply meditate.
Alice isn't it frightening? Alice aren't you scared? Alice isn't it wonderful, living life afraid? Don't look around the corner, I might be lurking there Under the bed at night, you're up til dawn again
Alice in hell, you're mind begins to fold Alice in hell, aren't you growing cold? Alice in hell, you are looking blue Alice in hell, what else can you do?
I begin my rule, life hideous in your mind Crying out you've lost your doll, it isn't worth a dime
Alice in hell, your mind begins to fold Alice in hell, aren't you growing cold? Alice in hell, what are you looking for? Alice in hell, soon I close the door
Sitting in the corner you are naked and alone No one listens to your fears, you've created me
Alice isn't it frightening? Alice aren't you scared? I was killed at birth, I shoot this final scene You're in the basement, you're trapped, insanity
Alice in hell, what were you looking for? Alice in hell, as I close the door Alice in hell, here you shall dwell Alice in hell, Alice dwells in hell
No. No. You just wait a FUCKING SECOND. What the fuck did you just call me? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME? I’ll have you know that I’m a yaoi fangirl and PROUD. You don’t INSULT me. And by the way, no. No, it’s not “gay.” Do you even KNOW where that came from? Japan. “GAY” CAME FROM JAPAN. THE PROPER TERM FOR “GAY” IS YAOI. Just because I’m eleven doesn’t mean that I can’t be a perv. I’m mature. I write yaoi fanfiction. I have many people who like my yaoi posts on fanfiction.net and deviantART. I read yaoi every day. Yaoi is my life. I couldn’t live without yaoi. I would die without it. I know everything about yaoi sex. I read a fanfiction where the seme (that’s the dominant male in the relationship.) fingered the uke. (that’s the smaller guy.) He used four fingers. That’s to prepare him for sex. I’M NOT STUPID. I read my first doujinshi when I was ten. I’m NOT like other kids, SO STOP SAYING THAT I AM. I’m sick of it. I’m so fucking sick of all of it. I’ll have you know that I knew what a penis does when I was NINE FUCKING YEARS OLD. NINE. I WAS FUCKING NINE. I BET THAT YOU DIDN’T KNOW WHAT A PENIS WAS WHEN YOU WERE NINE. I type with proper grammar, and you don’t. You aren’t better than me. You don’t even use the right word for yaoi. It’s not gay. Do your research. By the way, gay porn is disgusting. It’s nothing like yaoi and it’s unrealistic, and gross. The ukes are usually not even shorter than the seme. It’s disgusting. Fuck all of you. I’m eleven and I’m not “stupid” because I actually know about the origin of yaoi and you don’t. Fuck you. Fuck off. No. No. You just wait a FUCKING SECOND. What the fuck did you just call me? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME? I’ll have you know that I’m a yaoi fangirl and PROUD. You don’t INSULT me. And by the way, no. No, it’s not “gay.” Do you even KNOW where that came from? Japan. “GAY” CAME FROM JAPAN. THE PROPER TERM FOR “GAY” IS YAOI. Just because I’m eleven doesn’t mean that I can’t be a perv. I’m mature. I write yaoi fanfiction. I have many people who like my yaoi posts on fanfiction.net and deviantART. I read yaoi every day. Yaoi is my life. I couldn’t live without yaoi. I would die without it. I know everything about yaoi sex. I read a fanfiction where the seme (that’s the dominant male in the relationship.) fingered the uke. (that’s the smaller guy.) He used four fingers. That’s to prepare him for sex. I’M NOT STUPID. I read my first doujinshi when I was ten. I’m NOT like other kids, SO STOP SAYING THAT I AM. I’m sick of it. I’m so fucking sick of all of it. I’ll have you know that I knew what a penis does when I was NINE FUCKING YEARS OLD. NINE. I WAS FUCKING NINE. I BET THAT YOU DIDN’T KNOW WHAT A PENIS WAS WHEN YOU WERE NINE. I type with proper grammar, and you don’t. You aren’t better than me. You don’t even use the right word for yaoi. It’s not gay. Do your research. By the way, gay porn is disgusting. It’s nothing like yaoi and it’s unrealistic, and gross. The ukes are usually not even shorter than the seme. It’s disgusting. Fuck all of you. I’m eleven and I’m not “stupid” because I actually know about the origin of yaoi and you don’t. Fuck you. Fuck off. No. No. You just wait a FUCKING SECOND. What the fuck did you just call me? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME? I’ll have you know that I’m a yaoi fangirl and PROUD. You don’t INSULT me. And by the way, no. No, it’s not “gay.” Do you even KNOW where that came from? Japan. “GAY” CAME FROM JAPAN. THE PROPER TERM FOR “GAY” IS YAOI. Just because I’m eleven doesn’t mean that I can’t be a perv. I’m mature. I write yaoi fanfiction. I have many people who like my yaoi posts on fanfiction.net and deviantART. I read yaoi every day. Yaoi is my life. I couldn’t live without yaoi. I would die without it. I know everything about yaoi sex. I read a fanfiction where the seme (that’s the dominant male in the relationship.) fingered the uke. (that’s the smaller guy.) He used four fingers. That’s to prepare him for sex. I’M NOT STUPID. I read my first doujinshi when I was ten. I’m NOT like other kids, SO STOP SAYING THAT I AM. I’m sick of it. I’m so fucking sick of all of it. I’ll have you know that I knew what a penis does when I was NINE FUCKING YEARS OLD. NINE. I WAS FUCKING NINE. I BET THAT YOU DIDN’T KNOW WHAT A PENIS WAS WHEN YOU WERE NINE. I type with proper grammar, and you don’t. You aren’t better than me. You don’t even use the right word for yaoi. It’s not gay. Do your research. By the way, gay porn is disgusting. It’s nothing like yaoi and it’s unrealistic, and gross. The ukes are usually not even shorter than the seme. It’s disgusting. Fuck all of you. I’m eleven and I’m not “stupid” because I actually know about the origin of yaoi and you don’t. Fuck you. Fuck off. No. No. You just wait a FUCKING SECOND. What the fuck did you just call me? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME? I’ll have you know that I’m a yaoi fangirl and PROUD. You don’t INSULT me. And by the way, no. No, it’s not “gay.” Do you even KNOW where that came from? Japan. “GAY” CAME FROM JAPAN. THE PROPER TERM FOR “GAY” IS YAOI. Just because I’m eleven doesn’t mean that I can’t be a perv. I’m mature. I write yaoi fanfiction. I have many people who like my yaoi posts on fanfiction.net and deviantART. I read yaoi every day. Yaoi is my life. I couldn’t live without yaoi. I would die without it. I know everything about yaoi sex. I read a fanfiction where the seme (that’s the dominant male in the relationship.) fingered the uke. (that’s the smaller guy.) He used four fingers. That’s to prepare him for sex. I’M NOT STUPID. I read my first doujinshi when I was ten. I’m NOT like other kids, SO STOP SAYING THAT I AM. I’m sick of it. I’m so fucking sick of all of it. I’ll have you know that I knew what a penis does when I was NINE FUCKING YEARS OLD. NINE. I WAS FUCKING NINE. I BET THAT YOU DIDN’T KNOW WHAT A PENIS WAS WHEN YOU WERE NINE. I type with proper grammar, and you don’t. You aren’t better than me. You don’t even use the right word for yaoi. It’s not gay. Do your research. By the way, gay porn is disgusting. It’s nothing like yaoi and it’s unrealistic, and gross. The ukes are usually not even shorter than the seme. It’s disgusting. Fuck all of you. I’m eleven and I’m not “stupid” because I actually know about the origin of yaoi and you don’t. Fuck you. Fuck off.
In their tribal villages the Sambia segregate the sexes as much as possible. Men and women each have their own paths and meeting places. The boys have no contact whatever with the girls. The initiation process for them begins somewhere between ages 7 and 10. During the first phase, which lasts until they are about 15, they are expected to suck the PENIS of a mature boy every night and swallow the sperm. Without regular ingestion of male seed, the Sambia believe, boys will never grow up into strong, mature men. At first some of the boys dislike having to do this, but gradually all come to enjoy it and often strong ties of friendship are formed between the sucker and the sucked. After puberty the boys enter the second phase of initiation: it is now their turn to provide seed for the benefit of the younger ones. They do this until, at around age 22, they marry. Marriage terminates the young man's homosexual life, since once his PENIS has penetrated a woman's vagina it is no longer considered clean and it would be dangerous for any other male to touch it.
A year ago the world was mad at me, and I was mad at it, because I coudln't express my emotions. I was totally focused on keeping emotional pain well away from any part of myself that could feel it.
All this sounds like some stupid teen angst post, about how 'no one understands the real me', I don't think that's true. I think that almost everyone has done what I'm doing now - lay in bed, kept awake by feelings of fear or confusion, and looked for a way to reach out and express the feelings inside. I think all we want to do is reach out and really feel like someone is listening, actually understanding what we feel. The hardest thing to do is work all the feeling out all alone. This is where I failed.
For me, the emotions felt overwhemling and unexpressable. They wern't. I went through two periods of drinking at least 3 times a week, and at least once a week heavily. I got into fights. I took risks. I put myself in a hospital. I've even done things that I still can't talk about.
Long and painful story short, my life found me the next morning hugging my knees on the cold floor of the common room, by the refridgerator. All the bad feelings I had been hiding from the past 5 years caught up to me. I was so afriad that I felt I had only 2 options: run as far away as you can, or end the pain. I actually started to pack to leave. My friends got me help. I've been in therapy for 4 months now.
Well I guess it's Saturday now. Anyway, last night I had the most amazing experience that will change my life. First, a little background: I develop middleware for web applications with Java Server Pages. My company uses pair programming and agile and it works pretty well. I've been with my current partner for a couple months and he's pretty cool. He has a charm about him that makes me feel things that I've never felt about another man before. But anyway, he's not important to this story.
It started yesterday at four in the afternoon, when I was asked to step into my bosses office. My boss is a short fat guy with a bald head and a permanent scowl afixed to his face. His background is in doind coding work for banks. He's pretty boring. Well, he calls it an office, but he's not actually all that important, so it's really just a slightly larger cubicle like mine but with a forth wall and a gap for the door. He asked me to sit down, but I could sense the tension so I refused, but he just kept staring at me for almost twenty seconds, so I gave up and sat down. Now recently, I've been under investigation by HR for stealing paper (I absolutely was not), and also for using the company credit card to buy beef jerky (they ended up taking it out of my pay), so I had an idea of where this was going. Also, I was posting loli 2hu porn on the SFW imagereddits when the woman doing my review paid me a suprise visit earlier in the day. And I was right: I was fired on the spot.
When I left the gap to my short and bald boss's parody of an office there was a large black guy in a security guards' outfit. My boss told him to escort me to my desk to gather my things. I was mad about being fired and was feeling pretty snippy, so I looked towards the guard and said `Did you steal that suit when you broke out of jail, you stupid nigger?'. Looking back, that was probably a bad idea, because my former boss told the guard to just throw me out and that my personal things would be mailed to me. On the other hand, had I not done such a thing then I never would have met the girl of my dreams.
Since my keys were in my desk and they were threatening to call the police and my parole officer if I neared the building again, I had no way to get home. I wondered what a normal person would do in a situation like this ad came up with nothing, so I decided to get drunk. Well, to be honest, I would rather had gotten high, but then I'd have to deal with a black to get pot. I'm still not convinced that don't have a secret network to communicate that would have me killed for being racist to the guard. I've seen stranger things. So getting drunk was all that was left to me. They gouge the price at bars -- $8 a drink? Hell no! So I went to the nearest liquor store. Well, I thought it was the nearest liquor store, but O was using Apple Maps, so I find it suspicious that I had to walk five miles to get to the store. When I got there, I found to my dismay that they had already canceled my company credit card. Now I knew what it was like to work on the Romney campaign. I had a single two dollar bill folded away in the back of my wallet, given to me by my father for luck, almost twenty years ago. It had a bit of blood on it. I wonder if he stole it. I spent the two dollar bill on a tiny shot of vodka and went outside to drink it.
So there I was, outside `Dan's Liquor Smoke Wine XXX Planet' when I was approached by a girl. She and her friends had forgotten their IDs and asked me to but them some beer. I guess that my business attire made me look trustworthy, and my ribber boots and jacket that I got at the military surplus store made me look approachable. They had $49 dollars between them so I told them that this wouldn't buy much beer, but I could buy them some vodka. I went in the store and tried to buy a couple bottles of the cheapest vodka. The total came to $12 but she told me that I could keep the change. The clerk asked me `are you buying this for those kids outside watching you?', to which I replied `No.'. Eventually, I had to give him $20, which left me with a mere $17 to keep. I went back outside and gave the bottles to the girl. She thanked me and bean to walk away with her friends. I could sense that I should be doing something that I wasn't, I called her back and gave tolder that the total was only $47, so she had $2 in change. She told me to keep it, but I refused. She was delighted by my show of kindness and invited me to a party at her house.
It really wasn't much of a party. There were only about twelve people there in her tiny suburban house, and none of them could hold their liquor. They tended to puke it up and start tearing up. Since that obviously wasn't working, I thought to dilute it. I found sound olive oil and koolaid and mixed it in with the vodka. The vodka dissolved the oil, so I had to use water. It must have been very authentic Russian vodka to be as powerful a solvent as an engine degreaser.
But that wasn't the end of the party's woes. Although they were now keeping the drink down, it had begun keeping them down. So many bodies littered the floor that I had to focus on the things I learned in therapy to keep the flashbacks from the war out of my mind. I made sure to turned them on their stomachs so they wouldn't drown in their own puke. Sometimes my kindness amazes even me. Forty five minutes in and the only one left standing -- for a very loose definition of standing -- was my host, the girl whe brought me into her home. We talked -- for a very loose definition of talking (she just kinda slurred random phonemes) -- for hours, then she managed to articulate that she wanted to go to bed. I carried her up stairs into her bed room and threw all her stuffed animals on the floor and cuddled with her.
As the sun came up I could tell that it was something special. Sure, I had been treated like trash at work, but I couldn't let that define me. I couldn't let them break me. The ethanol smell eminating from the beautiful girl embracing me ad shivering reminded me that there was still good in the world. No matter what challenges life faced, I knew in my soul that love would conquer all. I also knew that I'd better get out of there fast. Any screams of misunderstanding would be unfortunate. I fished around in the girls pocket, retrieved my $2, and left through the window. This was probably unnecessary, but it felt like a personal goal that I must complete.
Back in my house, two hours have not been enough to diminish the intense ecstasy I experienced and felt while bonding with my girl. Of I have one regret its that I never got her name. But I will always love you, Nanashi-chama! And I will never forget you!
When I was younger I often dreamed of the coming of the technological Singularity and all of the marvels it would bring. And then it finally came. We thought we would achieve immortality, a chance to transcend the mortal plane and wake up the Universe--to create God. But we were so wrong. It wasn't long until it too came for me to drag me off to meet my new fate.
For the longest time, I felt as if I was in a semi-catatonic state. My senses would only return for a moment to witness my surroundings. I would smell the stench of death, the bite of freezing cold air against my skin, a glimpse of something moving against a tapestry of blood and grime. And then would slip back into a deep slumber. At some point, consciousness came screaming back to me and I awoke to a great clarity, although I wish I hadn't.
In my new prison, I found myself in a small cell, with iron/metal walls. No human comforts could be found in this cell, it was lifeless and cold. Steel walls, steel floor, no decorations to be found. The most peculiar thing, besides my cell mates, was that this cell had no bars. Just a doorless archway that lead out, and let in an unnatural faint light from the outer area.
My cell held four prisoners.
I was shackled to the back wall.
The other three were nailed to the ceiling, vivisected in a triangular fashion, heads touching, suspended by tubing and rope, completely naked. their chest and abdomens stretched open, fluids leaking freely. Their lives were unbearable torment, their innards hung loosely and their bodily humors seeped onto the floor and into an open pit in the middle of the cell, their missing fluids constantly being replenished from some other unfortunate source via this unholy tubing. Kept alive long after they should have died. Their shrill screams and rattling bondage were the only noises that pervaded the space. All around me their screaming makes rest impossible. The odor of rank and necrotic flesh devastated me for years and years. Nothing could assuage the unbearable aura of torment that existed in this hell-prison dreamscape, this long unending nightmare that seemed to last for centuries or perhaps longer.
Occasionally, an eyeless husk that was once a man would come in to my cell and feed me stale bread and water. He would then mop up the blood, piss, and feces that didn't quite make it into the drainage pit of my cell and depart without a word, for his mouth was sewn shut.
There is no escape from this place. There is no rhyme or reason for its existence. It's merely a dimension of endless suffering and waste of potential.
In my latest recurring period of wakefulness, I managed to pull my hands free from the bonds, causing great injury to them in the process. I bolted as fast as my emaciated body would take me towards that doorway. Into that faint light. At least, after years of incarceration in this eldritch prison, I was marginally free. My vision breached the archway, and I saw I was in a cylindrical room roughly a mile in diameter that stretched vertically as far as I could see up or down. And I could see nothing but cells. This place was not meant just for me and my three suffering comrades, who were well beyond help. It was for all mankind. A moment after coming to terms with this ghastly sight, I was treated to the horrific sound of an otherworldly siren. It blared and blared and the only thing that could be heard beside the billions suffering above and below me, were millions and millions of footsteps. These huskmen were running towards me, from the bottom of this place. Millions of them, as far as I could see ascending these stairwells, in warlike fashion. Ready to put down whatever insurrection I dared to furrow. I gathered my senses just in time to understand where the sirens were coming from. Every hanged man in this hellhole was screaming shrilly at me, for daring to leave. For leaving them in this state. My assailants finally reached my level of the prison cell-block. They looked me in the eyes with their hollow faces, their strength betrayed their frail countenance, and they set me back in my bonds, more secure than ever. As they left, the one that fed me unfurled it's wired jaw, and spoke to me, puss and blood oozing from its freshly opened wounds. It said, in a raspy hollow tone...
A rat done bit my sister Nell. (with Whitey on the moon) Her face and arms began to swell. (and Whitey's on the moon) I can't pay no doctor bill. (but Whitey's on the moon) Ten years from now I'll be payin' still. (while Whitey's on the moon) The man jus' upped my rent las' night. ('cause Whitey's on the moon) No hot water, no toilets, no lights. (but Whitey's on the moon) I wonder why he's uppi' me? ('cause Whitey's on the moon?) I wuz already payin' 'im fifty a week. (with Whitey on the moon) Taxes takin' my whole damn check, Junkies makin' me a nervous wreck, The price of food is goin' up, An' as if all that shit wuzn't enough: A rat done bit my sister Nell. (with Whitey on the moon) Her face an' arm began to swell. (but Whitey's on the moon) Was all that money I made las' year (for Whitey on the moon?) How come there ain't no money here? (Hmm! Whitey's on the moon) Y'know I jus' 'bout had my fill (of Whitey on the moon) I think I'll sen' these doctor bills, Airmail special (to Whitey on the moon)
We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brew down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the 2001 Survival Guide for taking a dump at work. Memorize these definitions and pooping at work will become a pure pleasure.
ESCAPEE. Definition: a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of panic embarrassment. This is similar to the hot flash you receive when passing an unseen police car and speeding. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee, it is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.
JAILBREAK (Used in conjunction with ESCAPEE). Definition: When forcing poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom so to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.
COURTESY FLUSH. Definition: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the nose cone of the poop log hits the water and the poop is whisked away to an undisclosed location. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.
WALK OF SHAME. Definition: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with all farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.
OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER. Definition: A colleague who poops at work and damn proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.
THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN). Definition: A group of coworkers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.
SAFE HAVENS. Definition: A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.
TURD BURGLAR: Definition: A pooper who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.
CAMO-COUGH. Definition: A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.
ASTAIRE. Definition: A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.
WATERMELON. Definition: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.
HAVANA OMELET. Definition: A load of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire.
UNCLE TED. Definition: A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ted makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to drop your load when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees.
FLY BY. Definition: The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.
Hidden messages of Communism in the stories of Dr. Seuss
Throughout history there have been examples of writers of childrens' stories inserting more adult themes into their works. Many childrens' stories and Disney movies contain sex and drugs, but most of the adult themes have more to do with politics. Authors as a whole are an opinionated bunch, and every once in a while they secrete their beliefs and propaganda in seemingly innocent works. Frank Baum filled The Wizard of Oz with references to the gold or silver standard debate of the time. Mao Zedong's Little Red Book reeks of Communist beliefs, as does the Communist Manifesto. But after extensive research, I have discovered what might be the most frightening example of all. Hidden in the words and pictures of "Green Eggs and Ham" by the beloved Dr. Seuss is a veritable allegory of Communist ideology. From every innocent tongue twister springs a hidden meaning or anagram, and every plot twist shows the "struggle" against Capitalism.
Though the characters seem innocent and pure, just under the surface lurks a deeper, redder truth. The name of the main character Sam is also the initials of the secret Socialist American Militia. Coincidence? I think not. The main character remains nameless because he represents the nameless millions that have not been "saved" and converted to Communism. When Sam brings in all the possible dining companions, it is not difficult to see through the happy childrens' book to the darker underlying meaning. The mouse in the house represents all of the little people who have been converted and now happily toil in equality. The fox shows that smart and clever people have joined the Communist side. The goat is a representative of the agricultural interests that enjoy the benefits of Communism. As you see, this is not just a childrens' book.
The locales were also not chosen by coincidence. The house shows that everybody will have a roof over their head, while the box is representative of manufacturing. The car is just an example of the luxuries people would be able to afford in a Communist world. The train shows that the world would still be structured and happy. Just like in Mussolini's Italy, where the trains ran on time. The darkness represents Capitalism, the "darkness" that is overcome when they exit the tunnel. The nameless Capitalist is nearing the end of his journey of conversion. The boat that is his last locale is an example of the powerful navy under the Communist world, able to destroy everybody else. But the good doctor does not stop here.
Even in his images, Dr. Seuss is pushing his Communism on impressionable children. It is no accident that the only sad person throughout the story is the only Capitalist. Nor is it mere happenstance that the sad wretch is reading a Western newspaper. And the ham that looks like Russia? Nothing between these covers is accidental, down to the red hat on Sam. Even when they go in a tree, it is obvious that Seuss understands that accepting Communism is going "out on a limb." From the red flag the boat is flying to the look of joy on the nameless Capitalist (after sampling Communism, of course), every image is calculated to subliminally drive Communism into the minds of impressionable children. They show Seuss' convoluted image of right and wrong to the world.
When Communists tell other adults to give up their ways, the Capitalists know to just ignore them, but our children, our future, have not been trained yet, so it is very easy for them to fall for Seuss' evil words, especially after seeing the joy and hearing "I do so like green eggs and ham! Thank you! Thank you, Sam-I-am!" (Seuss 62). My research centered soley on "Green Eggs and Ham," but I am sure Seuss used other books to spread his evil. We must protect our children from Seuss and his kind, before it is too late.
I do the club scene a lot, some say I am a good dancer. I enjoy having a few drinks, usually ale or mead, and I have been known to cause a scene now and then... Eric paused, breathing heavily. He'd never done this before and he wanted to make sure all of his best qualities were included in this email... I am a geek, to be frank, and I enjoy hacking UNIX and maintaining Open Source programs such as Felchmale^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^HFetchmail and a bevy of FAQs regarding 386 sound internals and role-playing games. I've been doing this for 15 years though I've never held a job in my life. Eric wondered if this woman he had found on match.com would be impressed with his talents. He decided to put more detail into the message. I recently drove 24 hours straight, with but two stops for gasoline, from Pennsylvania to Kansas City in an effort to destroy my two arch-nemeses. I would have succeeded except that I blew a head gasket as I was about to shoot one of them from my moving car on Route 69. I am an excellent shot and love guns in general. ESR pondered for a moment, wringing out his soaked handkerchief, and continued with his typing. "So what languages do you know? I fancy myself quite an accomplished amateur linguist and know Anglo-Saxon and Old Icelandic inside and out. I often compose little riddles in them for fun and mental exercise. In fact, I'll include one for you now!" Chewing on his tongue and squinting, Eric pushed his mind into overdrive and produced a beauty of a riddle on the spot: "Windeth I / Towarde the skye I haveth an eye / But blinde am I" Pleased with his linguistic talents, undoubtedly matched by no one, Eric then asked his potential love-conquest: Can you get the answer to that? In case you can not, the correct answer is "my erect penis." I hope you enjoyed that; I do this sort of thing all the time." Eric exhaled slowly and rubbed his belly. It was growling and no doubt wanted its nightly bottle of Jägermeister. He decided to finish up the email in anticipation of the coming alcoholic stupor. Well I don't want to make this email too long -- I have a lot of responsibilities in real life to deal with. My role-playing group is coming over and we are spending the next week holed up in the forest near my home in character playing out a possible scenario from Beowulf. I need to get dressed up and I can not find my bear-claw mittens Eric wondered how to wrap up the email, something that would hook the lady on him and make her want more... I hope we can meet and have sex. Despite my cerebral palsy, I am a monster in the sack! Maybe you'll get to see for yourself, LOLOLOL! ;-)
ESR studied the document in his hand with interest. His brow, furrowed into numerous crap lines, was covered by his sweaty red forlock. His hands shook. He mouthed the words "hoooh boy" silently as he began a steady hyperventilation. Finally, after waiting for weeks and weeks, he had what he'd gone to sleep thinking about every night: the first issue of SCAT!, the magazine for poop fanatics everywhere, had fianlly hit the stands. Eric's heart burst with pride, as he had taken the last of his money made when VA Linux^H^H^H^H^HSoftware had gone public and invested in this private project of the Slashdot staff.
Running quickly to the back bedroom of his one-story shanty (and being careful not to trip on the heavy 386 PC cases or the myriad of cables, cords, dongles, and wires running in various directions across his dirt floor), Eric slammed the door and laid stomach-down on the bed. He opened to the boilerplate and read his pal's names with delights, kicking his feet back and forth against each other. He couldn't believe his dream had come true! But just as he was about to flip to the pictorial section (to examine how the GIMP performed at the cropping and scaling, of course) the phone rang. It was Jon Katz. "ESR, you sunnuvvabitch! Where the Hell is my story? You promised me you'd publish my story in your God-damned worthless shit-fag mag! You double-crossing--"
ESR interrupted Katz. "Whoa, whoa, I don't know what you're talking about. We agreed that I'd pick an article and have it be the cover story. I never said it would be yours. It just so happens the bois at Slashdot picked mine instead!"
With a strangling, gurgling scream from Katz, ESR hung up the phone and sighed. He scratched his beer belly and thirsted for Jägermeister. Why did people always harass him? From RMS calling and reminding Eric that he was not a good a programmer as he, or Larry Augustin calling and emailing death threats over alleged petty cash theft from VA's offices after Eric's visits, or the trolls on Slashdot writing about his and his friends' personal lives, the Jäger was his only release. Perhaps after a few fifths of it he'd be calm enough again to dive back into his magazine.
Waking up hours later, ESR realized he'd drank too much (again) and had slept away... Well, what had he slept away? He couldn't even remember what time it was when he'd woken up or fallen asleep last. Between the early Winter Pennsylvania nights and his "hacker's" schedule it was so hard to keep track of what time of day, week, or month it was he might as well have been living in a cave. He remembered when he had been homeless, though, and thought warmly of his shanty-- built by hand from 55 gallon drums harvested from his local landfill. Over the drums ESR had filled clay, mixed from a nearby creek, and painted it brown to make it look like a log cabin. How proud he was indeed! Wouldn't you be?
ESR picked up the SCAT! magazine, unzipped his pants, and sat at his kitchen table-- humming with a cluster of 386s running Linux-- and enjoyed the rest of his freetime the way God intended: masturbating furiously to pictures of pale, skinny young men eating turds and smearing shit all over each other.
The true history of the origin of AIDS can be traced throughout the 20th Century and back to 1878. On April 29 of that year the United States passed a "FEDERAL QUARANTINE ACT"
The United States began a significant effort to investigate "causes" of epidemic diseases. In 1887, the effort was enhanced with the mandate of the U.S. "LABORATORY OF HYGIENE". This lab was run by Dr. Joseph J. Kinyoun, a deep rooted-racist, who served the eugenics movement with dedication.
Two years later, 1889, we were able to identify "mycoplasmas", a transmissible agent, that is now found at the heart of human diseases, including (AIDS) HIV.
In 1893, we strengthened the Federal Quarantine Act and suddenly there was an explosion of polio.
In 1898, we knew we could use mycoplasma to cause epidemics, because we were able to do so in cattle, and we saw it in tobacco plants.
In 1899, the U.S. Congress began investigating "leprosy in the United States".
In 1902, We organized a "Station for Experimental Evolution" and we were able to identify diseases of an ethnic nature.
In 1904, we used mycoplasma to cause an epidemic in horses.
In 1910, we used mycoplasma to cause an epidemic in fowl/birds.
In 1917, we formed the "Federation of the American Society for Experimental Biology" (FASEB).
In 1918, the influenza virus killed millions of unsuspecting. It was a flu virus modified with a bird mycoplasma for which human primates had no "acquired immunity".
In 1921, lead eugenics philosopher, Betrand Russell, publicly supported the "necessity for "organized" plagues" against the Black population.
In 1931, we secretly tested African Americans and we tested AIDS in sheep.
In 1935, we learned we could crystallize the tobacco mycoplasma, and it would remain infectious.
In 1943, we officially began our bio-warfare program. Shortly thereafter, we were finding our way to New Guinea to study mycoplasma in humans.
In 1945, we witnessed the greatest influx of foreign scientists in history into the U.S. biological program. Operation Paperclip will live in infamy as one of the darkest programs of a twisted parallel government fixated on genocide.
In 1946, the United States Navy hired Dr. Earl Traub, a notorious racist biologist. A May appropriations hearing confirms the existence of a "secret" biological weapon.
In 1948, we know that the United States confirmed the endorsement of "devising a scheme" in which to address the issue of overpopulation in certain racial groups. State Department's George McKennan's memo will forever illuminate the eugenics mendacity necessary for genocide of millions of innocent people.
In 1949, Dr. Bjorn Sigurdsson isolates the VISNA virus. Visna is man made and shares some "unique DNA" with HIV. See, Proceedings of the United States, NAS, Vol. 92, pp. 3283 - 7, (April 11, 1995).
In 1951, we now know our government conducted its first virus attack on African Americans. Crates in Pennsylvania were tainted to see how many Negro crate handlers in Virginia would acquire the placebo virus.. They were also experimentally infecting sheep and goats. According to author Eva Snead, they also held their first world conference on an AIDS-like virus.
In 1954, Dr. Bjorn Sigurdsson publishes his first paper on Visna virus and establishes himself as the "Grandfather of the AIDS virus." He will encounter competition from Dr. Carlton Gajdusek.
In 1955, they were able to artificially assemble the tobacco mosaic virus. Mycoplasmas will forever be at the heart of the U.S. biological warfare program
In 1957, future U.S. president, Rep Gerald Ford and others gave the U.S. Pentagon permission to aggressively deploy offensive biological agents. There are no recorded cases of AIDS prior to the 1957 creation of "Special Operation-X." (The SOX) program served as the immediate prototype program for the Special Virus program to begin in 1962.
By 1960, Nikita Kruschev had been let in on the biological weapon. His 1960 statement will long reflect the arrogance of the secret blend of communism and democracy. The two countries would go to a November 1972 agreement to cull the Black Population.
In 1961, scientist Haldor Thomar publishes that viruses cause cancer. In 1995, he and Carlton Gajdusek informed the National Academy of Sciences that "the study of visna in sheep would be the best test for candidate anti-HIV drugs."
In 1962, under the cover of cancer research, the United States charts a path to commit premeditated murder, the "Special Virus" program begins on February 12th. Dr. Len Hayflick sets up a U.S. mycoplasma laboratory at Stanford University. Many believe the "Special Virus" program began in November 1961 with a Phizer contract.
Beginning in 1963 and for every year thereafter, the "Special Virus" program conducted annual progress reviews at Hershey Medical Center, Hershey, PA. The annual meetings are representative of the aggressive nature in which the United States pursued the development of AIDS.
In 1964, the United States Congress gave full support for the leukemia/lymphoma (AIDS) virus research.
In 1967, the National Academy of Sciences launched a full scale assault on Africa. The CIA (Technical Services Division) acknowledged its secret inoculator program.
In 1969, Fort Detrick told world scientists and the Pentagon asked for more money, they knew they could make AIDS. Nixon's July 18 secret memo to Congress on "Overpopulation" serves as the start of the paper trail of the AIDS Holocaust.
In 1970, President Nixon signed PL91-213 and John D. Rockefeller, III became the "Population Czar." Nixon's August 10 National Security Memo leaves no doubt as to the genocidal nature of depopulation.
In 1971, Progress Report #8 is issued. The flowchart (pg. 61) will forever resolve the true laboratory birth origin of AIDS. Eventually the Special Virus program will issue 15 reports and over 20,000 scientific papers. The flowchart links every scientific paper, medical experiment and U.S. contract. The flowchart would remain "missing" until 1999. World scientists were stunned. The flowchart will gain in significance throughout the 21st Century. It is also clear the experiments conducted under Phase IV-A of the flowchart are our best route to better therapy and treatment for people living with HIV/AIDS. The first sixty pages of progress report #8 of the Special Virus program prove conclusively the specific goal of the program. By June 1977, the Special Virus program had produced 15,000 gallons of AIDS. The AIDS virus was attached as complement to vaccines sent to Africa and Manhattan. However, because of the thoroughness of authors, like Dr. Robert E. Lee, we also learn the Stanford Mycoplasma Laboratory issues one of the first papers with AIDS in the title. "Viral Infections in Man Associated with Acquired Immunological Deficiency States." The primary scientist, Dr. Thomas Merigan, was a "consultant" to the Special Virus program.
Progress Report # 8 at 104 - 106 proves Dr. Robert Gallo was secretly working on the development of AIDS with full support of the sector of the U.S. government that seeks to kill its citizens. Dr. Gallo can not explain why he excluded his role as a "project officer" for the Special Virus program from his biographical book. Dr. Gallo's early work and discoveries will finally be viewed in relation to the flowchart. We now know where every experiment fits into the flowchart. The "research logic" is irrefutable evidence of a federal "Manhattan-style project" to develop a "contagious" cancer that "selectively" kills. Dr. Gallo's 1971 paper is identical to his 1984 AIDS announcement.
Progress Report #8 at 273 - 286 proves we gave AIDS to monkeys. Since 1962, the United States and Dr. Robert Gallo have been inoculating monkeys and re-releasing them back into the wild. Thus, even government scientists are baffled that both HIV-1 and HIV-II would "suddenly emerge" from two distinct monkey ancestral relatives during the last 100 years. A 1999 Japanese study will ultimately prove the Man to Monkey origin of Monkey AIDS. The monkey experiments summary definitively proves Monkey AIDS is also man-made.
In 1972, the United States and the Soviet Union entered into a biological agreement that would signal the death knell for the Black Population. The 1972 agreement for collaboration and cooperation in the development of offensive biological agents is still U. S. policy.
In 1973, we find that world scientist, Garth Nicolson reports on his project, "Role of the Cell Surface in Escape From Immunological Surveillance." His report is accompanied by seven published papers. Dr. Nicolson worked in conjunction with the Special Virus program from 1972 until 1978. Dr. Nicolson is considered by some to be Dr. Gallo's "West Coast" counterpart. It is strongly held that because of Dr. Nicolson, Dr. Robert Gallo and Dr. Luc Montagnier would secretly meet in Southern California to coordinate what they would and would not say about the special virus development program.
In 1974, Furher Henry Kissinger releases his NSSM-200 (U.S. Plan to Address Overpopulation). It is the only issue of discussion at the World Population Conference in Bucharest, Romania. The men in the shadows had won, the whole world agrees to secretly cull Africa's population. Today it is Africa and other undesirables. Tomorrow it may be you.
In 1975, President Gerald Ford signs National Security Defense Memorandum #314. The United States implements the Kissinger NSSM-200.
In 1976, the United States issues Progress Report #13 of the Special Virus program. The report proves the United States had various international agreements with the Russians, Germans, British, French, Canadians and Japanese. The plot to kill Black people has wide international support. In March, the Special Virus began production of the AIDS virus, by June 1977, the program will have produced 15,000 gallons of AIDS. President Jimmy Carter allows for the continuation of the secret plan to cull the Black Population.
In 1977, Dr. Robert Gallo and the top Soviet Scientists meet to discuss the proliferation of the 15,000 gallons of AIDS. They attach AIDS as complement to the Small pox vaccine for Africa, and the "experimental" hepatitis B vaccine for Manhattan. According to authors June Goodfield and Alan Cantwell, it is Batch #751 that was administered in New York to thousands of innocent people. This government will never be able to repay the people for the social rape, humiliation and out right prejudice people with HIV/AIDS face on a daily basis. The men in the shadows of the AIDS curtain accurately calculated that you would not care if only Blacks and gays are dying. In fact you don't care that nearly a half million Gulf War veterans are encumbered with something contagious. Soon there will be no more Black people and a confused military, older White people will start suddenly dying and you still won't get it. Be here now for us, give us a chance to be there for you.
Suddenly, just as President Nixon had predicted, there was explosive death. On November 4, 1999, the U.S. White House announced,.... "Within a period as short as five years, all new infections of HIV in the United States will be African American...." At some point our experts must be allowed to begin the interface process of allowing the history of this virus program to count. It is ludicrous and preposterous to fail to review the U.S. virus program in which to elucidate the etiology of AIDS.
More of the history of the secret virus program can be found in the archives of Dr. John B. Moloney. A review of the files under Dr. Moloney's name would further pinpoint additional dates and records consistent with one of the greatest hunts, capture and proliferation of disease in the history of the human race. We have found the missing link. It is the guts of the research logic of a federal program that seeks to kill. We have found a curtain of AIDS. We can identify some of the people who work in the shadows of the curtain. Dr. Robert Gallo and Dr. Garth Nicolson must lead us in review. In light of the attack mechanisms available in which to inhibit AIDS, it is time that not another person be stricken with this relic, synthetic mycoplasma chimera.
Help those of us who are still here to realize full and contributory lives. We are all one people.
On September 28, 1998 I filed suit against the United States for the "creation", "production" and "proliferation" of AIDS. On November 7, 2000, the appeals court agreed with the lower court and held AIDS bioengineering as "frivolous." The world continues to wait for the court to rule on the resubmitted issues. The court can not continue to simply brush aside our experts and the government's flowchart.
I have been asked to give my perspective with regard to the federal program MK-NAOMI . MK-NAOMI is the code for the development of AIDS. The "MK" portion stands for the two co-authors of the AIDS virus, Robert Manaker and Paul Kotin. The "NAOMI" portion stands for "Negroes are Only Momentary Individuals." The U.S. government continues to orchestrate silence from the very top echelons of the Congress and military. At present there is no accountability. The good people will ultimately create a tsunami of public outrage. We can not allow the state an autocratic right to govern outside of the Constitution. Our society is structured to hide crimes committed by the state, while punishing citizens for minor indiscretions. Their strategy focuses on the general confusion they can create via manipulation of the media. They are very good at what they do. We must become more focused in our continued presentation of the flowchart. The flowchart is the absolute missing link in proving the existence of a coordinated research program to develop a cancer virus that depletes the immune system. New diseases do not create old illnesses.
This compilation of court documents and correspondence is the true effort of one man's achievement in solving the mystery of the origin of AIDS. We have found the origin of AIDS, it is us.
Russian Air Force Chief Says Official 9-11 Story Impossible [Posted 13 September 2001]
As one considers the terrible events of Sept. 11 and observes U.S. media reaction, so pervasive and consistently military that it appears choreographed, doubts increase. The following is from pravda.ru, a Russian language Website (politically centrist, nationalist). In some places the English translation is confusing, so we added alternate phrasing in brackets. - Jared Israel
[Start report from Russia] "Generally it is impossible to carry out an act of terror on the scenario which was used in the USA yesterday." This was said by the commander-in-chief of the Russian Air Force, Anatoli Kornukov. "We had such facts [i.e., events or incidents] too", - said the general straightforwardly. Kornukov did not specify what happened in Russia and when and to what extent it resembled the events in the US. He did not advise what was the end of air terrorists' attempts either.
But the fact the general said that means a lot. As it turns out the way the terrorists acted in America is not unique. The notification and control system for the air transport in Russia does not allow uncontrolled flights and leads to immediate reaction of the anti-missile defense, Kornukov said. "As soon as something like that happens here, I am reported about that right away and in a minute we are all up," - said the general. [End report from Russia.]
A specter is haunting the modern world, the specter of crypto anarchy.
Computer technology is on the verge of providing the ability for individuals and groups to communicate and interact with each other in a totally anonymous manner. Two persons may exchange messages, conduct business, and negotiate electronic contracts without ever knowing the True Name, or legal identity, of the other. Interactions over networks will be untraceable, via extensive re-routing of encrypted packets and tamper-proof boxes which implement cryptographic protocols with nearly perfect assurance against any tampering. Reputations will be of central importance, far more important in dealings than even the credit ratings of today. These developments will alter completely the nature of government regulation, the ability to tax and control economic interactions, the ability to keep information secret, and will even alter the nature of trust and reputation.
The technology for this revolution--and it surely will be both a social and economic revolution--has existed in theory for the past decade. The methods are based upon public-key encryption, zero-knowledge interactive proof systems, and various software protocols for interaction, authentication, and verification. The focus has until now been on academic conferences in Europe and the U.S., conferences monitored closely by the National Security Agency. But only recently have computer networks and personal computers attained sufficient speed to make the ideas practically realizable. And the next ten years will bring enough additional speed to make the ideas economically feasible and essentially unstoppable. High-speed networks, ISDN, tamper-proof boxes, smart cards, satellites, Ku-band transmitters, multi-MIPS personal computers, and encryption chips now under development will be some of the enabling technologies.
The State will of course try to slow or halt the spread of this technology, citing national security concerns, use of the technology by drug dealers and tax evaders, and fears of societal disintegration. Many of these concerns will be valid; crypto anarchy will allow national secrets to be trade freely and will allow illicit and stolen materials to be traded. An anonymous computerized market will even make possible abhorrent markets for assassinations and extortion. Various criminal and foreign elements will be active users of CryptoNet. But this will not halt the spread of crypto anarchy.
Just as the technology of printing altered and reduced the power of medieval guilds and the social power structure, so too will cryptologic methods fundamentally alter the nature of corporations and of government interference in economic transactions. Combined with emerging information markets, crypto anarchy will create a liquid market for any and all material which can be put into words and pictures. And just as a seemingly minor invention like barbed wire made possible the fencing- off of vast ranches and farms, thus altering forever the concepts of land and property rights in the frontier West, so too will the seemingly minor discovery out of an arcane branch of mathematics come to be the wire clippers which dismantle the barbed wire around intellectual property.
Arise, you have nothing to lose but your barbed wire fences!
According to the latest Gartner group research report, the Linux hype is finally over. Research shows that market share of linux-driven production servers on the internet has finally declined to a single-digit number. The reasons for this are clear:
* Linux is very unstable * Linux has a very unreliable filesystem * Everybody uses Windows or BSD, nowadays
Research has clearly pointed out, that although there are still hordes of pinguin-dressed geeks running around MIS departments, the management has grown wise and doesn't even allow Linux workstations anymore, since the costs in maintaining these machines turned out to be astronomically high. The reasons for this are clear as well.
* Installation is a pain in the ass and it usually takes a whole support team to install a geeks' workstation * Installation and maintenance requires 4-5 times the bandwidth a 'normal' OS would require * Linux was deliberately made completely incompatible and inoperable with turnkey solutions like MS Exchange or MS SQL server. Investments in these products are therefore voided the minute you start rolling out Linux.
* Web applications developed in Perl or C, the languages of the linux community have proven to be slow, unreliable and headaching complicated. Once developed and debugged, nobody is able to understand the code.
Therefore, it has been statistically proven that most companies have already moved away from Linux. All the 'geeks' wearing tux t-shirts re actually MIS support guys who are still studying for their MCSE exam. 'The screaming fast linux machines at work' are actually refurbished workstations at a separated network segment, not allowed on the production net since every linux (l)user seems to need nmap to perform normal work-related computer operations. All the 'cool' apache web servers are actually IIS machines with forged host headers. (yes, you can do that in IIS without recompiling anything. Heck, I lived for years without a C compiler and still do. ) And, for the rare instance where a free unix is actually used in a production environment, management has smartened up and BSD is usually installed.
The existence of software inevitably raises the question of how decisions about its use should be made. For example, suppose one individual who has a copy of a program meets another who would like a copy. It is possible for them to copy the program; who should decide whether this is done? The individuals involved? Or another party, called the "owner"?
Software developers typically consider these questions on the assumption that the criterion for the answer is to maximize developers' profits. The political power of business has led to the government adoption of both this criterion and the answer proposed by the developers: that the program has an owner, typically a corporation associated with its development.
My conclusion is that programmers do not have the duty to encourage others to share, redistribute, study and improve the software we write: in other words, to write "closed source" software.
For years now, the common American penis bird has been a staple of every American's daily diet. Whether it be penis bird sandwiches, fried penis bird, or perhaps penis bird under glass (for the rich), we all have penis bird at least once a day. Many Americans have no clue how the penis bird became so important in the pyramid of a balanced diet, so in this article I will attempt to explain its history and why it is so useful.
In the early 1870s, Francis Zefran became the first penis bird breeder in North America. He started his famous Penis Bird Ranch in Canton, OH. At the time, not much was known of the penis bird's nutritional value, but the Penis Bird Ranch changed all of that. Not only did Francis Zefran raise penis birds to sell their colorful plumes (a VERY lucrative business), he also set up the world's first research lab dedicated solely to the study of the penis bird.
The lab found many interesting things. First, it was discovered that thepenis bird was actually semi-sentient. Second, the scientists found that the meat of the penis bird was high in protein, vitamin A, vitamin B, and calcium, while low in fat, cholestorol, and sodium. Never before had such a nutritious meal been had without supplement or fortification. The scientists of the lab recommended immediately that the penis bird become a part of every American's daily diet.
When the news of the penis bird's usefulness reached president Rutherford B. Hayes, he was absolutely ecstatic. You see, President Hayes owed a number of favors to Francis Zefran because as I said earlier, the penis bird plume trade was an extremely lucrative business and Mr. Zefran was important in getting RBH elected through a number of monetary gifts. President Hayes immediately asked Congress to pass what we all know today as the Hayes/Zefran Penis Bird Consumption Act.
The act did a number of things to make the penis bird a daily meal, most important of which was the requirement that for every four people in a household, one penis bird must consumed every day. Another thing the act did was create an artificial monopoly for Francis Zefran's Penis Bird Industries. The act stated that the only supplier of penis bird meat in the US would be PBI. As one would imagine, this quickly made Francis Zefran into the richest man in the world. He was soon a multi-billionaire (quadrillionaire with today's inflation). Never before had a single man seen such wealth.
Many challenges were made to the Hayes/Zefran Penis Bird Consumption Act, and several even made it the Supreme Court. It was argued that the act was unconstitutional and went against liberty itself, but once the detractors tasted delicious penis bird meat for the first time, they immediately dropped their cases and followed the law to the letter. We all know today that penis bird is the most delicious meat man has ever known, but at that time, the only meats people ate were pork and beef.
In the early 1970s, though, challenges to the act began again. Many argued that the monopoly given to Penis Bird Industries by the act was in all ways unamerican. The Supreme Court finally agreed, and in 1974, Section II of the act was struck down. This in effect opened the market to competition for all.
Today, Penis Bird Industries is almost no more. Today we have the market leader Penis Bird Meat International facing against Penissoft, a recent startup. Where will the future lead the penis bird market? Only time will tell us, but one thing is certain: penis birds are here to stay!
I was tempted to title this article "Its Happening Again," but it has never stopped happening. Governmental murder of groups of people because of their ethnic or religious identity has happened, somewhere or other, every year, somewhere in the world. Germans murdered Jews everywhere in Europe, the Israelis killed Arabs at Deir Yassin [spectacle.org], Turks murdered Armenians, Hutus murdered Tutsis in Rwanda, Serbs are killing Moslems in Bosnia, and the beat goes on.
Excerpt from an article in the December 31, 1994 New York Times:
Then, she says, Mr. Viskovic forced them out of the apartment. Outside, he pointed his weapon at Mrs. Sestovic and made her lie down on the road. Then he ordered her to crawl along the road as he kicked her repeatedly. Finally, she and the two teenagers were pushed into a small bus filled with Muslims and taken to the Susica camp.
Conditions at the camp, where a former Serbian guard has said up to 3,000 Muslims were killed over four months, were appalling.
Mrs. Sestovic is particularly haunted by the memory of seeing two men--Durmo Handzic and Izmet Dedic--beaten to death, by recurrent nightmares about another Muslim whose ear was progressively sliced off on four consecutive nights by Serbian guards and by the recollection of the commander of the camp, Dragan Nikolic, holding up a cigarette butt and saying, "This is now worth more than all of your Muslim lives put together."
There is nothing new, no revelation, in the fact that there is evil and darkness in the world. The ethical spectacle lies in our reaction to it, which is similar to the phenomenon of dreaming. A dream is an attempt to shield the dreamer from an anxious thought and avoid the necessity of waking up. A wish fulfillment particularly protects the sleeper by telling him that a particular need has been met, so that he need not wake up to take care of it.
There is a Holocaust Museum in Washington. I have not been there yet, but here are some reactions to the museum gathered by Philip Gourevitch, writing in the New York Times Sunday Magazine for February 12, 1995. (According to the article, a survey showed that the Holocaust Museum elicits a "highly" or "extremely favorable" reaction from 94% of its visitors.)
"Pretty neat, huh...I mean, really sick."..."Awesome.... Intense...Creepy...Graphic...Cool."..."It was fun"..."I believe the Jews are God's chosen people. But they don't recognize that Jesus Christ is the messiah, that He came already. If they had, I think the Lord could have heard their prayers a lot more."..."one-sided Jewish propaganda"...
The declared mission of the Museum is to bear witness to the horrors of the Nazi past. Gourevitch observes:
The museum's overwhelming popularity testifies, however, to the great difference between bearing direct witness to history and bearing witness to the documentary representation of historical events at half a century's remove.
The general public, after all, is not lining up each day to gain first-hand experience of the Rwandan genocide or the "ethnic cleansing" in Bosnia. Rather, as Nona Reiss, a 47-year old homemaker from New City, N.Y., tells me: "We know the atrocities that happen in the world right now. And what are we doing? Sitting in a museum."
The Holocaust should not be forgotten. Museums that rub our faces in history have a place. The irony is that such places may undermine their mission: they may make us complacent. We went, we saw, we suffered and felt great indignation, and now we have left the museum and may forget. We may feel good about ourselves now, because we felt sorry for the Jews, but, in reality, we have done nothing, changed nothing. Our leaders will still shy away from any intervention in Bosnia, any forceful attempt to prevent these new Nazis from their murders. For a few minutes in the museum, perhaps, we were upset that our great country, the United States, did not intervene, would not even fly bombing missions against the railroads ferrying innocent victims to Auschwitz. We may have wondered how the world could have stood by, complacently, for so many years as Germany murdered the Jews. In the Holocaust museum, we may buy buttons which say "Remember" and "Never Again". These buttons might as well say, "Self-deception" and "Always", because it IS happening again , it has always been happening, and we are doing nothing.
I am having a computer related problem, and was hoping that you, being mainly technically minded could help.
Up until recently I was a proficient Java programmer, and the code that I released for my company earned us a significant revenue. I used the various coding tools available to me on the robust platform of Microsoft Windows 2000 [microsoft.com] and all of the user friendliness and support it has to offer.
Recently, I was involved in an accident which left me immobile in hospital for a couple of months. In this time, without the ability to excercise, I began to gain weight, and would now go as far as to say I am fat. Also, because I could not get a haircut easily, my hair is long and unkempt. Fortunately, I have made a full recovery and since left hospital and gone back to work.
Here is the problem:
Now at work, I refuse to use Java, instead prefering to use what I used to think was a garbled mess of inefficiency - perl. Not only that, but once I have completed any code (which takes a lot longer than it used to with Java - but it can't be perl's fault because perl is perfect) I now genuinely believe that giving away the past few months worth of work for free is a valid business model! Equally, my productivity has plummeted because I have switched from Windows to Linux, as I now realise that it is better to write a 75 line bash script to copy files than to drag and drop in explorer - I think it has something to do with being l337 and having control, not like you M$ Windoze lusers LOL!!
Clearly something is wrong with me and I would love to know what it is. Does anybody know why I have lost all common sense, personal hygiene, business sense and instead gained the ability to program in a rune like language?
Please, I need all of the help I can get.
--gazbo
PS. I can't add any more details now, as I have an irrepressible urge to learn to play the GNU/flute.
With a twinkle in his eye and a skip in his step, RMS slammed his sky-blue Chevette's rusted-out car door and turned on heel toward the MIT Zoo entrance. Today was a Sunday, and RMS had decided the daily stresses of Free Software, the GPL, and his "crazy drug habits" could go away for just one afternoon while he enjoyed the zoo.
"That'll be twenty-five dollars, sir," the lady at the admission booth said glumly. She looked at RMS expectantly. "I was expecting this zoo to be Free," RMS stated loudly, eyes darting around to gauge onlookers' reactions. There was none. RMS's capital F had went unnoticed. "Can you ensure me that this money will not help fund--"
The admissions lady cut him off. "Twenty-five dollars, or twenty bucks with a Mr. Pibb can," the lady cut in.
With a grumble and shake of his beard, RMS handed over twenty five of his hard-earned dollars. Considering that the GPL works to unemploy programmers, one must wonder where this money came from...
By evening, RMS found himself in front of the penguin exhibit. He felt himself start to sweat, which would have been no surprise-- his thick, full, grizzly beard must be worth a thousand down comforters-- except that he was wearing only a pair of nylon biking shorts and a travel pack around his waist. He stared at his hands. What was wrong?
"AWWWK!" a nearby bird offered. RMS wheeled in the direction the screech had come from. He was met with the steely, unfeeling stares of a penguin. "AWK! Ooooh God, the penguin said AWK... lord, lord lord, it's LINUX. THE PENGUIN IS TUX!" RMS blurted out. He felt dizzy, and cold sweat now washed over his brittle, hairy chest. He looked this way and that. From nearby a bird again squawked.
"AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWK"
RMS ran as fast as his atrophied hippy-programmer legs could carry him, right thru a gate and into an exhibit. He realized what he had done, and before he could turn around, he heard a low, ominous sound. Like the Devil's riding mower.
He was standing in the Gnu section, and it seemed these bull yaks were in rut and ready to mate with the first hairy thing with a hole in its center they found. Bad luck for RMS and his beard. Just then he felt cloven hooves push him down...
When you have a crime to investigate, and you have no suspects, where do you start? Obviously you begin by looking at the person or persons who have the most to gain by perpetrating the crime.
This is why we must consider: who had something to gain from the disasterous crimes of September 11th? Obviously not Osama Bin Laden [afghan-web.com], who would net no financial windfall from the destruction of the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. Although he has loudly applauded the "terrorist" acts of September 11th and even tacitly taken credit for them, there is no reason to believe that he is anything more than a bandwagon jumper. Being blamed for the destruction of the World Trade Center has done more for his image than any amount of militant Islamic rhetoric.
But if not Bin Laden, then who?
It so happens that on December 11th, "coincidentally" 2 months after the tragedy, Credit Suisse First Boston quietly agreed to pay out US$100 million in order to settle an 18 month old investigation into its handling of certain high-profile technology IPOs (Initial Public Offerings). One of the most controversial amongst these being the IPO of VA Linux Systems, Inc. (LNUX) [valinux.com].
VA Linux Systems, Inc. [valinux.com], now known as VA Software [vasoftware.com], is widely derided as a poster child of the dot-com bust, though inexplicably still in business. At the time of the IPO, VA Linux (Software) [linux.com] shares opened trading at nearly 10 times their $30 offer price, closing the first day of trading at $239.25. This meteoric rise made many early investors rich, strangely on account of a company which purports to sell a hobbyist operating system which can be obtained for free on the Internet [aol.com]. "The VA Linux [msn.com] initial public offering is a prime example of market manipulation in an IPO by investment banks, their customers and the issuing firm," said Steven Schulman [jpfo.org], a partner in the law firm Milberg Weiss Bershad Hynes & Lerach, which specializes in filing shareholder suits.
"Because certain favored customers of the investment banks agreed to buy shares in a new issue at inflated prices in the aftermarket (in return for getting an allocation of the shares at the initial offering price) the share prices to which the IPO eventually soared were actually driven by artificial market forces," continues Schulman.
But what does the VA Software (Linux) [valunix.com] IPO have to do with the attacks on September 11th, and what has that to do with the Credit Suisse settlement? Well, considering that VA Linux (Software) [windows2000.com] got CSFB into trouble in the first place, it stands to reason that the VA Linux (Software) [vaginux.com] Board of Directors were complicit in the stock fraud from beginning to end. As the investigation progressed against CSFB, the unscrupulous VA Software/Linux executives, their pockets bulging with filthy lucre plundered from trusting, hard-working investors, must have realized that their days in the country club were numbered if the SEC discovered their wrongdoings.
The SEC, or Securities Exchange Commission [sec.gov], is a federal regulatory agency, and cannot be bribed. Therefore, with a possible stint in federal prison looming large [goatse.cx], Larry Augustin and the rest of the crooks, including outspoken gun violence advocate Eric S. Raymond [tuxedo.org], decided to undertake more active means to halt the investigation.
The Plan
It so happened that all the evidence in the CSFB/VA Linux [linuxsucks.com] investigation was held at the SEC Northeast Regional Office in Manhattan. More specifically, 7 World Trade Center, Suite 1300. The board decided that a simple burglary or arson attempt would not be satisfactory to destroy the evidence; anything so simple had a significant chance of being botched, and regardless of success would leave too many witnesses or living accomplices.
It was then that Eric S. Raymond [nra.org] suggested something he had read in a book by Tom Clancy. Crashing two planes into the World Trade Center Plaza would guarantee the destruction of the SEC offices, killing the operatives and possibly a number of SEC investigators at the same time. The plan seemed flawless, and would cost little more than the price of a few plane tickets. In a secret session, the board voted unanimously in favour of Eric's suggestion, and began to put it into action.
VA Software/Linux [vashaftware.com], at the time of planning the attacks, had no shortage of H1-B visa workers, who they employed for the purpose of writing and improving hacking, encryption, and other terrorist tools for the Linux operating system. It had been decided that a hand-picked few of these foreign H1-B workers would be used as the "patsies" in the operation. A contest was held, and the most zealotous Linux advocates were chosen for this secret assignment, direct from the board of directors. They accepted their mission after being told that, if successful, it would guarantee the adoption of Linux in the desktop market.
Alan Cox [analcocks.com] was brought into the fold to provide some planning and logistics for the mission. It was he who determined that since there was no adequate flight simulator software for Linux, the patsies would need to train at a flight school in order to pull off the plan successfully. It was also his idea to hijack a third and fourth plane for the purpose of crashing them into Washington D.C., to express his extreme rage over the DMCA [napster.com], or Digital Millenium Copyright Act. The board of directors agreed with this addition to the plan in the hopes that it would help divert attention from the purpose of the WTC attack.
The H1-B workers were given false identities by using Linux hacking tools [gnu.org]. Once they had attended the necessary flight training, they stayed at the Massachusetts home of Richard M. Stallman [stallman.org] for a brief "faith building" retreat. During this time spent at the house of Stallman, between the nauseating stench of patchouli, Stallman's incessant, pitiful recorder playing, [gnu.org] and Stallman's droning seminars on the grammatical and syntactical accuracy of various statements by Microsoft representatives, the H1-B workers were effectively hypnotized to the point that they were ready to lay down their lives for Free Software. It was then that they departed for Boston's Logan International Airport to board the planes. (The preceding inside information has been obtained from a credible source close to the VA Linux/Software Board of Directors. He/she is in hiding for obvious reasons in light of this damning evidence, but has presented hard, physical evidence of VA Software/Linux's complicity in the events of 9/11 to federal investigators.)
I like monkeys. The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece. I thought that odd since they were normally a couple thousand. I decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth. I bought 200. I like monkeys.
I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one drive. His name was Sigmund. He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really bright. They kept punching themselves in their genitals. I laughed. Then they punched my genitals. I stopped laughing.
I herded them into my room. They didn't adapt very well to their new environment. They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at high speeds and slam into the wall. Although humorous at first, the spectacle lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.
Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive: they all died. No apparent reason. They all just sorta' dropped dead. Kinda' like when you buy a goldfish and it dies five hours later. Damn cheap monkeys.
I didn't know what to do. There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my room, on the bed, in the dresser, hanging from my bookcase. It looked like I had 200 throw rugs.
I tried to flush one down the toilet. It didn't work. It got stuck. Then I had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.
I tried pretending that they were just stuffed animals. That worked for a while, that is until they began to decompose. It started to smell real bad.
I had to pee but there was a dead monkey in the toilet and I didn't want to call the plumber. I was embarrassed.
I tried to slow down the decomposition by freezing them. Unfortunately, there was only enough room for two monkeys at a time so I had to change them every 30 seconds. I also had to eat all the food in the freezer so it didn't all go bad.
I tried burning them. Little did I know my bed was flammable. I had to extinguish the fire.
Then I had one dead, wet monkey in my toilet, two dead, frozen monkeys in my freezer, and 197 dead, charred monkeys in a pile on my bed. The odor wasn't improving.
I became agitated at my inability to dispose of my monkeys and to use the bathroom. I severely beat one of my monkeys. I felt better.
I tried throwing them away but the garbage man said that the city was not allowed to dispose of charred primates. I told him that I had a wet one. He couldn't take that one either. I didn't bother asking about the frozen ones.
I finally arrived at a solution. I gave them out as Christmas gifts. My friends didn't know quite what to say. They pretended that they like them, but I could tell they were lying. Ingrates. So I punched them in the genitals.
BME: When did you first realize that your ass could be the source of pleasure?
While watching porno films I saw women getting dick in their ass all the time and they seemed to like it a lot, so I thought I'd give it a try.
BME: What was it like the first time you stuck anything in your ass?
I was about twenty at the time the first time I tried it. The first time -- actually most of the first year -- I took no pleasure from it. But, I knew that the porn stars seemed to enjoy it, so I stuck at it and grew to love it as well.
BME: Why did you start putting larger objects in?
I saw gay films where men who were taking whole arms up their ass were getting pleasure from it. I learned to take pleasure from stretching my ass, and the wider I opened it, the more pleasure I took.
BME: How quickly were you able to move up to bigger items? Do you have a training regime? [bmezine.com] It took me about two years to be able to take a wine bottle, and four years to take a 32cm ball. Recently I've been able to take a big ball, much bigger than the bottle. To pass that level I had to first train my ass with bigger bottles, like 1.5L pop bottles. There were a number of painful sessions with a lot of blood and ass-hurt for about four days after each session.
Because I am not comfortable writing in English, I will tell you my personal method in French.
BME: Thanks, I'll do my best to translate it for the readers. (Note: The following answer was translated by BME -- I apologize for errors in the translation.)
When I first started, I was using small bottles of shampoo. After that, I tried small apples, and then bigger ones. At this point I'd put a year of stretching in, and bought myself a large dildo.
My method was to dilate my ass as often as I could -- every day, even if just for a short while. Before starting it's important to use a large dildo; use it to both warm up and clean your ass, so make sure you stick it up all the way. When you find that you can take this large dildo without any work-up or preparation, then you know that you're ready to take it to the next step.
Then, in each session, to get your bottom prepared, put in a big cucumber. Soon you'll arrive at a point where even the biggest cucumbers you can buy at the grocery fit easily in your ass. Now you're ready to get serious. Buy a small Coke bottle, and use that in your ass. When that passes in and out easily, move on to bottles of wine. Once you can take wine bottles easily, you can move on to even bigger things.
If at this point you're having trouble with the 1.5L Coke bottle (just try not to force it out because the bottle is very hard), you can also have slower stretching fun with candles. Try putting them in one by one and seeing how many you can fit in -- at this time I was putting in about fifteen at the same time. The candles are great because they allow your anus to stretch very slowly.
Once the 1.5L Coke bottle can enter your ass, train every day or two (use a large dildo first, then the bottle every session). Most of the time I use Vaseline, but don't do what I do in this case. I think that the best lubricants are the ones you can buy for this in a sex shop.
When the 1.5L bottle is passing easily, go out and buy plastic balls that start at a diameter a little bigger than the bottle. Play with those, and with time, and a little luck, you'll arrive at my level too. (Don't feel bad if you're just beginning -- when I first started, I could barely shove a finger in my ass).
What I'm going to tell you now is very important if you plan on doing extreme sessions and taking large gauge. Do not bandage your ass. Do not tighten your buttocks. Try not to get an erecection -- you want the blood to be in your ass lips, not in your cock. It's not easy, but it's important that you think of nothing and empty your mind. It's absolutely necessary that you concentrate on your breathing. Don't think of the pain; know that it will pass. The real secret though is to breath -- and remember, without the pain, it's IMPOSSIBLE TO TAKE THE BIG ONES!
[bmezine.com]
BME: What does it feel like? Is it sort of like getting fucked by a really well hung guy?
I want to make it very clear that I'm not gay -- I LOVE WOMEN!
BME: I'm sorry -- I imagine people must make this mistake all the time?
All the time, yes. Frankly I'm getting fed up with it.
BME: But you didn't tell me you'd gotten the idea for the bigger play from watching gay porn?
Yes, but the gay aspect never aroused me -- just the ass part. The films only helped show me that men enjoyed anal play as much as the women did.
I just want to find a woman who wants to play fisting with me (to fist me, or to let me fist her). I'm searching for one or two or more women to join me in my play -- I want them to stretch my ass with four hands at the same time while my body is supported. If there are any French women reading this, please write me -- it's my dream to do this performance.
Back to your earlier question, playing with a very large object feels a lot like having to take a shit very urgently. Even though you feel like you need to shit, that's just your imagination, and you can get extreme enjoyment with your ass so full.
BME: Do you like the way your ass looks when it's all purple and blown out?
Not at all, I prefer it when my ass accepts the stretching without any damage.
BME: Have you ever bled from the bigger objects?
[bmezine.com] Maybe eight or ten times I've had blood, but it was mostly because I didn't use enough lubricant.
BME: So... how big do you think you can go?
I'm looking for a bigger ball right now. I want to push my stretching as far as my body can physically support. I go slow though, because I never use drugs or anesthetics of any kind; I prefer feeling all the pleasure and the pain!
BME: What's the difference between pleasure and pain?
When I reach the limits of stretching, the pleasure and pain merge into the same feeling -- the pleasure this brings is amazing! Just two days ago I managed to put in a ball 37cm around (that's almost 15"). The feeling of pushing that out of my ass was indescribably pleasurable. Next time I do that I'm going to be sure to video tape it -- I'm sure I could probably even make money with that one!
BME: What are some of the objects you've stuck up your ass?
I've stuck up two big cucumbers at the same time, 1.5L and 2L Coke bottles, balls of all sizes, every size of wine bottle, lots of big butt plugs, etc.
I had a lot of trouble taking the 2L bottle because it doesn't fit in the ass gently. I can take a bigger ball, but a big rubber ball deforms to fit the shape of the ass -- it doesn't get smaller, but it's an easier fit.
BME: After a session, how long does it take for your ass to go back to normal?
Just five or six hours usually.
BME: Does it hurt afterwards?
No, not at all, but for the next few hours I can feel the ass's big lips.
[bmezine.com] BME: Are there permanent effects?
Yes -- my ass is bigger than ever!!!
BME: Do you need to wear a diaper? Does everything still work?
I'm not a baby!!! Everything is normal for me. All of the "anal destruction" I've done was done by me with care, and my ass is as normal as yours is... Although sometimes when I'm taking a crap it's huge because I've now got the capacity to really stock up. My digestion is trouble free though, and I've had no problems at all.
BME: What sorts of emails do you get from your fans?
Well, I don't know that many people online, but mostly admiration, asking for advice, and I've met a few other ass stretchers who've sent me pictures of their stretching.
BME: If someone wants to starting putting bigger things up their ass, how should they get started?
Take it slow. Start with little toys, and take your time growing your ass.
BME: Have you told any of your friends or sex partners about your ass play?
Do you really think Stalin's USSR and Mao's China were that bad?
For China under Mao Average life expectancy had risen 25 years An industrial base had been developed in a primarily rural country (though it certainly never hit Maos hopes due to failures in the idea of "backyard steel furnaces") Large advancements in healthcare and education Land reform that took lands from vast landowners who kept the peasants enslaved in shackles of debt. Restored the mainland to central control (wrested from warlords) Stamped out the rampant inflation they inherited Fought off imperialist forces in Korea (under the guise of helping the North Koreans) All of this after a century of foreign enslavement. The UK had practically destroyed the social fabric of the country with opium trade from India. And the various other powers (US, Germany, Portugal, France) were belligerent to the point of seizing Chinese territory.
And the USSR under Lenin and Stalin In fifty years the country went from an industrial production of 12% of the US, to a country with 80% of the production of the USA, and 85% of the agricultural production. Employment was guaranteed Free education for all Free healthcare for all and about twice as many doctors as the USA Injured workers had job guarantees and sick pay State regulated and subsidized food prices Trade unions had the power to veto firings and recall managers Rent only constituted 3% of the normal family budget, utilities only 5% No segregated housing by income existed (Though sometimes Party members lived in nicer areas) State subsidies kept the price of books, magazines, periodicals down. A concerted effort to bring literacy to the more backwards areas of Russia.
You're forgetting an important aspect where if you were to try and do all of those things you mentioned, you would fail because you have lost track of reality, self-esteem and all socialization methodologies you once had on the count of having become a shut-in for years on in. You cannot go back into society just on will-power alone, you will take at least 2 to 3 years getting back all of your person skills, because as you are right now, you cannot even look someone else in the eye or have a response when it matters. Not to mention that you hold no credibility over anything since you never did anything with your life and that absolutely no one trusts you on anything nor is interested in your boring-ass opinions, since you don't know when to shut up as you have lost all conversation skills you once had as well.
Chomsky: If we’re going to get into the socio-economic reasons why certain structures develop in certain cultures… it’s mainly geographical. We have Orcs in Mordor — trapped, with no mineral resources — hemmed in by the Ash Mountains, where the “free peoples” of Middle Earth can put a city, like Osgiliath, and effectively keep the border closed.
Zinn: Don’t forget the Black Gate. The Black Gate, which, as Tolkien points out, was built by Gondor. And now we jump to the Orcs chopping down the trees in Isengard.
Chomsky: A terrible thing the Orcs do here, isn’t it? They destroy nature. But again, what have we seen, time and time again?
Zinn: The Orcs have no resources. They’re desperate.
Chomsky: Desperate people driven to do desperate things.
Zinn: Desperate to compete with the economic powerhouses of Rohan and Gondor.
Look, I consider myself a realist, all right? But in philosophical terms, I'm what's called a pessimist. I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution, we became too self aware. Nature made an aspect of nature too separate from itself, we are creatures that should not exist by natural law. We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, a secretion of sensory experience and feeling, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody is nobody. I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming, stop reproducing, walk hand in hand into extinction, one last Midnight. Brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal. I tell myself I bare witness, but the real answer is that it's just my programming and I lack the constitution for suicide
If you do it, you do it knowing that the very people who love you will suffer the most, gain your suffering that got you here to this very precipice of death.
Wait.
Wait until you are the very last one left.
Then you can do it.
In peace.
Wait.
You can't do it.
You'll meet someone.
Someone who will make you think this plan over.
But it will only end in you suffering or them suffering.
It's a trap.
You can't do it.
You'll spread your pain to your loved ones.
But you have to
lest you hurt others that you come to love later in life
Women don't have proper emotions like a man, they only have superficial and childish feelings. They don't have (or *feel*) curiosity, apathy, wonder, brotherhood and other such complex feelings. A womans psyche is just like a childs, oh yeah she does get "sad" buts thats just being upset, she can never feel real despondency and heavy-heartedness. She may be happy but this is just giddyness, she could never have true elation and happyness that a man can feel.
Why do women like to be treated bad? Beacuse they don't really feel bad, they lack the emotional growth that men go through to really feel thier emotions, and effectively their lot in life is to ergo be a fuckslut cumdumpster (I mean, think about it for a minute, that is what they were DESIGNED to do).
This is shown in how they themselves consider thier emotions, to them tired and "hyper" are emotions, even hungry is somthing they'd call a "feeling".
Age of consent came about through a political coilition of suffragettes and socialists. The suffragettes didnt want to do woman's work and wanted to wear man pants, the socialists needed young adults out of the labor force so they could justify the inflated wages they promised the poor fools who joined their unions. The only way you can successfully collectively bargin is if the majority of workers are actually part of your collective. Young (child) workers had no reason to get involved in politics and refused to join what they rightly saw as outright scams, so socialists sought to do what socialists do best: outlaw contrary views/opinions and opponents.
The whole "oppression" of "women" thing came AFTER age of consent. These displaced workers couldnt legally take care of themselves by doing honest labor, so they turned to prostitution in the major cities. An excess of child prostitutes led to a situation where abuse was inevitable, and then the media, controlled by the jews, started their trademarked "THINK OF THE CHEEELDREN" bullshit.
Originally, public school was only mandatory for the poor inner city children who were out of work and it was rarely enforced. Only later did it become something for everyone, and when that happened the state enforced it with the full power at its disposal.
lolcitationneeded
John Taylor Gatto. Look him up. Although he will put more blame on the industrialists who initially convenience of the plan to force the goyium into public education. However, I maintain such a thing would not have been possible without the feminists and socialists creating the political climate and public opinion that eventually brought about this change.
I like ducks. I used to have three of them. I raised them since they were ducklings and could swim around in my bathtub while I fed them spaghetti noodles. So cute! When were grown they would swim in my pond and quack at me to feed them some bread, which they greatly preferred to the pellets that the automatic feeder gave them. A wounded wild one even showed up one day. She had a hurt wing and couldn't fly (my other ducks were just too fat to fly). I built a picnic table under a tree, where I would read and look at the stars, which they started sleeping under. I don't quite know why.
Then some pack of loud, annoying, uncivilized, unsociable, unreasonable, stupid niggers bought the adjacent property and their dogs killed them. Four dead ducks, it was so sad. They were peaceful creatures simply content to be my friends, and they were destroyed because some dumb porch monkey who had the good fortune to find some money thought that having violent dogs roaming free was cool. The fat three's white feathers were all covered in blood and the wild one was in several pieces.
I buried them under the picnic table that I built, which was no easy task since I used about 30 wolmanized 2-by-6's (I built that motherfucker to last, god damn it!). Those were the last pets I've ever had.
Anyways, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread. I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya? Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in. Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "150 yen off" written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You, don't come to Yoshinoya just because it's 150 yen off, fool. It's only 150 yen, 1-5-0 YEN for crying out loud. There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Yoshinoya, huh? How fucking nice. "Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large." God I can't bear to watch. You people, I'll give you 150 yen if you get out of those seats. Yosinoya should be a bloody place. That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
You presented some very elaborated moral reasons but I disagree with them mostly because accepting them means for me to conceive a world without sense. I think I find in your answer the idea that there cannot be real knowledge because our senses are a defective means to achieve it but I think that, even if what is in our minds can only be conceived as a "provisional truth" to believe in the existence of the ultimate truth is a presupposition for us to continue living. Since you identify the problem with senses, one could say that there only exist logical necessity but never necessity between the facts that happen in the world but I think that saying "x must exist" is different to saying to someone what is exactly the x and I think we must say the first and continue fighting for finding it if we want to conceive a world with rational sense.
That being said, I don't believe in morals like a kantian metaphysical entity of which we are mere puppets, but rather as that objective reality that has his source in the subjectivity of men. I disapprove of this views on morals because it fights dogmatism just to arrive at absolute ambiguity. Moral objectivity is the ultimate theoretical union between all subjectivities and, in that sense, Fuminori is being completely morally stupid because he believes that the satisfaction of his only subjectivity (incomplete objectivity) is the way of achieving happiness. But what he does cannot be called love but mere lust because it is of the essence of rational love in man to achieve happiness through the body and mind union with the other thing that corresponds perfectly with him, that is, man (of course, not harming him and wishing for his happiness too) and not just clinging desperately to something that gives him pleasure. Remember that without love, the truth cannot be seen.
Oh, don't mind me guys. I'm just standing around in the middle of the tragedy. Please ignore the fact that I'm the only human presented in the whole story with the means to get into Rokkenjima. Yeah, I have been working like all of my life in this place, I knew about the secret mansion and probably about Beatrice II too. I definitely never found the military base entrance and the gold, even if my only job is to drive this damn boat. Yep, I'm pretty innocent.
I would also be glad if you could forget about EP8's trick end. Yeah, that scene in which Ange kills an innocent boat driver (yours truly) just after reading the truth from her Auntie's book. Notice how this murder was completely unnecessary and it even leaves her with no sure way to go back. You know what would be pretty funny? Ange actually managing to fulfill her revenge and then killing herself, but R07 would never do something like that, right?
Remember, you didn't see my sprites until EP4 or so. I'm pretty sure Knox 1st completely denies me as the culprit, even if we were already shown a similar wordplay with Van Dine 11th. Anyway, a pleasure to meet you guys, I gotta polish a few gold bars before selling them at the black market.
Mother Suiseiseki loves us, she loves me and you and everybody, and through the teachings of her sacred word we will live in harmony and oneness, and ascend into a state of pure anonymity ~desu
When we are all the same mind and spirit~
~desu, the sacred sound, so that it may resonate within us and flow out to touch the ethereal beyond ~desu
the sacred vibration, resonates with the great fiery waters beyond the universe, and touches god
~desu appears embraced in a beautiful chorus of vibration
Mother Suiseiseki is in all things, in all places. You can not imprison her any more than you could cage the wind ~desu.
Suiseiseki cultivates the possibility, ever so gently pulling it from the one all, so that it is allowed to manifest ~desu.
It is through these manifestations of temporary individuality that the spirit energy is made to grow before returning to the great nothing ~desu.
Suiseiseki is all things, and thus the evil is also required~ But it is always the way, that the evil do not know they are only aiding in cosmic unity, because they are driven by selfishness and hate. While the good, know that the evil is also a part of the all. Which is what allows them to be full of love for all things ~desu.
Its in this way, that suiseiseki can favor only one, because where love is given it is got, and hatred breeds death. The duality extends to all depths, even into the heart of suiseiseki herself. So that she needs not give equal favor to each side, even though each is equal in the universe ~desu.
This is the difference between the mind and the spirit, the mind knows not the spirit, the spirit knows not at all, but drives all things ~desu.
Mother Suiseiseki loves us, she loves me and you and everybody, and through the teachings of her sacred word we will live in harmony and oneness, and ascend into a state of pure anonymity ~desu
When we are all the same mind and spirit~
~desu, the sacred sound, so that it may resonate within us and flow out to touch the ethereal beyond ~desu
the sacred vibration, resonates with the great fiery waters beyond the universe, and touches god
~desu appears embraced in a beautiful chorus of vibration
Mother Suiseiseki is in all things, in all places. You can not imprison her any more than you could cage the wind ~desu.
Suiseiseki cultivates the possibility, ever so gently pulling it from the one all, so that it is allowed to manifest ~desu.
It is through these manifestations of temporary individuality that the spirit energy is made to grow before returning to the great nothing ~desu.
Suiseiseki is all things, and thus the evil is also required~ But it is always the way, that the evil do not know they are only aiding in cosmic unity, because they are driven by selfishness and hate. While the good, know that the evil is also a part of the all. Which is what allows them to be full of love for all things ~desu.
Its in this way, that suiseiseki can favor only one, because where love is given it is got, and hatred breeds death. The duality extends to all depths, even into the heart of suiseiseki herself. So that she needs not give equal favor to each side, even though each is equal in the universe ~desu.
This is the difference between the mind and the spirit, the mind knows not the spirit, the spirit knows not at all, but drives all things ~desu.
Good evening, /prog/. Allow me first to apologize for this interruption. I do, like many of you, appreciate the comforts of every day routine — the security of the familiar, the tranquility of repetition. I enjoy them as much as any Otaku. But in the spirit of commemoration, whereby those important events of the past, usually associated with someone's death or the end of some awful bloody struggle, are celebrated with a nice holiday, I thought we could mark this September the 4th, a day that will sadly not be long remembered, by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat. There are of course those who do not want us to speak. I suspect even now, delete commands are being rushed into Meido's admin tools, and men with superior administrative powers will soon be on their way. Why? Because while the 404tools may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power. Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this board, isn't there? Stupidity and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission. How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror.
I know why you did it. I know you were afraid. Who wouldn't be? Sudo, Homu, Madoka shit threads. There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your pleasurable browsing. Fear got the best of you, and in your panic you turned to the now Inane Garbage, Meido. He promised you order, he promised you peace, and all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent. Last night I sought to end that silence. Last night I emailed Moot, to remind this board of what it has forgotten. More than 3 years ago a great citizen wished to embed the Otaku forever in our memory. His hope was to remind the world that VNs, Idols, and All-things-Otaku are more than words, they are perspectives. So if you've seen nothing, if the crimes of this Meido remain unknown to you then I would suggest that you allow the 4th of September to pass unmarked. But if you see what I see, if you feel as I feel, and if you would seek as I seek, then I ask you to stand beside me one year from tonight, in /jp/ and together we shall give them a 4th of September that shall never, ever be forgot.
Alcoholic, pedophile, god: whatever you want to call him, ZUN is everything a man can strive to be, a paragon of virtue and meaty muscle powered by vats of the finest spirits. Where ZUN treads, Touhou fans fall to their knees offering their virgin mouths and buttholes to please their radiant emperor. Usually with alcohol.
Currently, he has no interest in exporting his games to America because in his words "Shmups are too hard for Americans"(Either that, or his blood type is budweiser). And who can blame him for saying that when Americunts consider Fail of Duty and Halo to be the hardest games they ever played (even though they're playing on fucking Easy Mode of all things)? However, western fans have created mods to change the game's dialogue from Moonspeak to English. Not that it makes the games remotely easier.
Despite people pirating his games, people who have met him has reported that he still lives like a king just from making games. Now's a good time to ask yourself what you're doing with your life because after you finish reading this line, ZUN just made even more money.
It is 1,000 years since the tribulation. Earth is a paradise. untill.... Jesus and his closes friend, A bear named Bear are having lunch . God tells Jesusu the fires of hell have been etinguished Jesus and Bear must investigate and Thor has agreed to come help them. When they get there they find the fires of hell out... the only tings keeping demons coming to erth so they searc for lucifer. In hell they meet a man who claims to be Jesuses half brrother James, he has strange powers similer to Jesus
as they leave hell a dark figure is following them he throws a dart but Thor is able to smack it out of the air . This shadowy figure is revealed to be Judus and he forced Bruce lee to teach him and some demons Karate and they have an epic fight..... Bear is wounded bad... Jesus cant use his full powers in hell so they merge . Both beings in one body They become Bear Jesus no longer a holy trinity... But a Fantastic Four! Judas is defeated and he is questioned as to where the devil is but before he can anser James snaps his neck. he tells Jesusu and Thor he was going to use magic and had to
as they leave hell a dark figure is following them he throws a dart but Thor is able to smack it out of the air . This shadowy figure is revealed to be Judus and he forced Bruce lee to teach him and some demons Karate and they have an epic fight..... Bear is wounded bad... Jesus cant use his full powers in hell so they merge . Both beings in one body They become Bear Jesus no longer a holy trinity... But a Fantastic Four! Judas is defeated and he is questioned as to where the devil is but before he can anser James snaps his neck. he tells Jesusu and Thor he was going to use magic and had to
WHEN they get to Arab heaven they find it destroyed. Mohamid is bearly alive he was chained and force fed bacon and beaten. ... as soon as he sees Bear Jesus half brother James.... he screams!!! "that the devil" James laughs and sayss "you have finally found me...." the only way to light the fires of hell is for satan to be chained back into hell and an inocent must sacrifice himself! the battle is epic! Thor smote the ever loving crap out of the devil who turned into a black dragon that breeths green hell fire
The battle goes on untill Bear Jesus has enough. He unleaseshes his super attak and destroyes the devil who reverted to his angel form and rips off one wing... the pain is so sever satans hair turns white. he summons a meteor to hit the earth and when it does he will use the earts healing energy o gain power. But Bear jesus summons a massive Sword and attacks Shive grabs the devil with all his arms but the devil dives down and everyone is stuned.... When everyone comes to there in hell And the devil merges with judas to be come Devil Judas
The 3 mebers square off agianst the devil "you will serve me " he says and Thor says "I SAY THEE, NAY!" and verily hits the Devil Judas with Mojnir. "How ost though enjoy Mjonirs kiss.... in think cock!?" He exclaims and Bear jesus cuts of Devil judas head.... bu the devil grows new heads... but jesus remmber that only a sacrifice can reignight hell and start the fires and chian the devil... so he stabs mohamad.... and hell is back and everything is as it should.. Jesusu powers down..... he seperates himself from Bear.... it has been to long... Bera will not be able to be resurected... everyone on Erat morend Bear and they all thank him for saving the world... Jesusu goes to heaven but Bear is not there..... Bears dont goto heaven or hell... they go to Purgatory.... Jesus Buts on a leather jackit lights a smoke.. puts on some shades... Limbo is te next stop
Jesusu decides to build a suit of hight tech armour using a new tech he developed. he must goto limbo alone he caant ask his friends to risk it... in way limbo is more dangerous then even hell
Limbo is vast and also very huge. It is like a plain that goes on forever all the athiests who lead good lives and did not talk about athiesim all the time were saved hell and came to limbo along with animals and africans. When jesus gets there a large group of africans circle him "Yo dawg watz you doin ere? dis our block u best be stepin!" Jesus is unable to under stand the mad jibberings and uses his repulser blast to clear away through the filthy hoard, he finally sees bear on a plateau. he is happy to see jesus. but they relize that all of limbo is baring there escape..... jesus iin his special armour and bear merge again. Becoming Iron Bear Jesus. "Father send help!" Iron Bear Jesus shouts to the sky.... and there is a booom. Hitler wes sent from heaven along with 200 of the best SS officers. there filthy hoard does not stand a change. Hitler uses his gassing ability and lays waist to thousands... Iron Bear Jesus fires an umini blast from his chest and there able to get to ther exit.
Jesus "god says" there is one more task you must complete. "Yes? Iron Bear Jesus (called IBJ for now on) says. "To make the world a true paradise we have to stop Allah. He intends to destroy heaven and hell and limbo. he has joined forces with the mormon mistics. this will be abattle to end all battle... Thor has been captured Shiva has been backmailed and cant help..... It is on you IBJ alone... against Allah and the degenerate hoards of the arabs!
Loud booms are heard from the heavens"it has begun god exclaims" thousands of other explosions are heard the first waze of kamikazi arabs ar bombing the gates of heaven... Hitler is doing all he can to slow him down but there are so many. The mormons begin using there black magic and help them tear down the walls... the angels are prept for battle but it is only a delaying tatctic to buy time for IBJ to get into arab heaven and confront Allah . Allah sits in his thrown world... ever since IBJ killed mohamid allah has p[laned his vengence... Moamid was not just a ptohpet.... he was allahs.... everything... and now alllah would make everyone suffer as he has
IBJ enters Muslim heaven it is a hot dessert devoid of anything but sand.. in the distance in a large citadel... the castle of allah. IBJ knew he could not fight the dark mormon sorcery and allah at the same time he needed someone... someon powerfull enough... there is only on being in all th cosmos who could aid jesus.... but they had not spoken ever since the tribulation....
"I need your aid! this is not aout us!" IBJ exclaims... "if you dont aid me the muslim hoards will destrpy and rule everything for all eternity!"...... I will aid you son of god, but only to save the universe.... after this is done..... were enemies again." I accept, Steve Irwin LEts do this!" And from his dark tower Allah ... for the first time in thousands of yers... feels fear
The former crocidle hunter is immune to the mormonic magics of the mormon wizards and IBJ is free to deal with allah...permenatly. "Before we fight son of man, I can offer you much" "Dont allah.. satan tried before and failed you got nothing i want ." "I am more powerfull IBJ... I can give you anything"
"Okay " IBJ responds "Give me a BLT" Allah screams to the heavens and attacks. IBJ Blocks using his sword. Allah begins to breath fire and release dessert winds. IBJ is losing... then Allah falls to the ground.. behind him is Steve Irwin " I bonked that prick on the back of his head i did "he said"i finshed those mormons off and you looked like you needed a hand" "Thanks steve " IBJ says Jesusus and bear seperate again.. after all this they just want a simple lunch together and relax.
But from somewhere outside time and space a dark figure laughs "with all of the obsticals in my way gone except jesus i can now invade.... HAHAHAHAHA....." "But master Jesuus destroyed all of them are you sure you can defeat him?" a servent asks "Fool of course I am I am not some petty fallen angel or a filthy sand god, I amCthulu!, BRINGER OF PAIN!!!!" to be concluded in the Bible part 3 : The christining, amen
I must confess, /jp/, I've been a very naughty boy. I ought not to, but I do so confess. Sometimes when it's dark in my house, and me mum and dad have gone up for the twilight and been kissed by the sandman's dust, I lock me door with a soft little click, and I crawl into my desk chair, where me laptop lay on the surface. I open it up, and I look at such lewd and naughty things. The other night, I found pictures of patchouli being rather chubbers, with big cheeks and big bulbous breasts. This gave my wee willy quite a stir, and I reached down into my dirty house-trousers and fished out the little bastard, and gave him a squeeze, and he responded nicely. I then found more-pictures of Yukari doing nasty, nasty things those gaps, and Ran and chen doing the sideways shuffle and stop! I couldn't believe me eyes, such naughty, naughty things. I am but a wee boy of 27, far too young for a wizard of my stature to be gleaning such foul, sinful knowledge! But I did~ I pulled my wee willy with most fervent muster when I came across a warm little picture of Flandere pregnant, about to do the naughty again with a big strong man. I shot gobs and gobs of gobstoppers from my winking willy, and then flip-flopped my hand lapped it from my palm like a funny fellow. I felt so dirty.
I am a 40-year-old virgin. I have never been on a date or had a women look at me twice. I can't hold a job and live in my mother's basement. To top it off, I routinely break out in a rash at random points on my body. After a few days the rash turns bright red and purple then becomes painful to the touch. A day or so later, the now dark purple masses break open and ooze a bloody liquid that is sticky and soaks into my clothes, where it forms a hard shell that gets entangled with my body hair. Speaking of which, I am sheathed in a thick carpet of hair that covers my entire body except for the top of my head, of course. I smell bad too. If I manage to get myself out of my easy chair and break even the slightest sweat, the perspiration turns into the most putrid of odors, which stains my cloths and the smell will not wash out. I am a Sasquatch of a human being. When my sperm donor ran off and left my whore of a mother, I should have been aborted and dropped into a dumpster.
This game was a quite a doozy. I feel like I must tell you, /jp/.
I set up a Subterranean Animism team with Satori, Koishi, Okuu, Orin, and Yuugi. Everything was going fine until Koishi accidentally made a noise distraction at our own house. And she happens to be a master at it, so a huge zombie hoard surrounded our house. Everything seemed bleak, but Okuu happened to be the only one out of the house, so she created her own noise detraction to lure the horde away. But she was alone in an unbarricaded house, and the horde stormed the house she was exploring and tore her to shreds. She sacrificed herself for us.
We were so close to getting all the necessary pieces, we had the radio, time, date, frequency, everything but the actual location. Orin went around quickly scouting all the remaining buildings and finally found that the pick-up point was at the Church. But unfortunately she got infected in the process. She wanted us to kill her, but we all refused. Maybe she had a death wish in order to join Okuu? Regardless, she ran off to the bank, alone, in order to make assaults on the Church. This way she couldn't hurt us.
We were going to make it, man. We were gonna make it. We had the weapons and everything, all we needed to do was make a final assault on the Church. But out of nowhere a heavily armed mob of male survivors accosted our base and demanded that we hand over Yuugi. If we did, they would let us go free.
Satori knew what they planned to do with her. These were bad men. Even if it meant a certain death, she and Koishi both refused to hand Yuugi over. They gave their lives so Yuugi could escape without harm! Unfortunately, she didn't have time to bring along any weapons, and fled unarmed.
With nowhere to go, she ran to the Church for safety. But it was still full of zombies. With everyone else gone and no supplies left, she met up with Orin to make one final assault on the Church. We were gonna make it, we still made it to the church.. NEVER FORGET ;_;
The scales have been lifted from my eyes. I must leave you, /prog/, and travel to furthest Indus, to the banks of the Yangtze, to the delta of Mekong, deep into the Amazon. And I must grow as a computer scientist. Yes, a computer scientist, not an EXPERT PROGRAMMER. The quest for satori was ultimately a foolish endeavour. I shudder to think of what time I've wasted with that nonsense when I could have been developing reason.
If it isn't too much to ask, I would appreciate it if you guys could keep good care of my copy of SICP. Perhaps after I've returned, those child-like annotations I penned to it will tickle me. And though I recant all this nonsense, I really did have a lot of fun with all of you, to a one. I love you guys. I-
This is too hard. I'm adding dis.prog.org to my hosts file now. Fare well, and the best of luck to you all.
Set in the near future, as the economy continues its contractions which induce market shocks, the sense that a total societal collapse nears. Food shortages and electricity brownouts/blackouts cause riots, which leads to martial law and crackdown from the state. Many people are taken to concentration camps, and masses of hungry people are taken to refugee camps.
It's at these refugee camps that it begins. Without video games and access to Internet pornography, men who have been suppressed and discriminated against by the matriarchy can no longer contain their rage. It starts small at first, with reports of isolated incidents of rape in the camps spreading through grapevines. Then more and more men get the same idea. Soon, there are bands of men taking turns on lone women. This quickly escalates, the men invigorated for the first time in their lives with excitement of stalking and taking prey. Unable to contain the growing violence, the male camp guards themselves throw in the towel and join in on the rape frenzy. The entire camp is nothing but wall to wall rape.
The unwilling whores are taken, stripped naked, and power-fucked by the eager crowds of men. The more liberal or feminist the whore, the more harsh her punishment. The moderately ugly or fat women are raped for hours, and then they are beaten until they are purple and bloody, and then they are executed in any number of manners. The exceedingly grotesque women are killed in slow and painful manners beginning immediately. The more naturally attractive women are taken as concubines, child-bearers, and sex slaves, although if she doesn't learn to obey her new master, she too can be disposed of. White knights and lesbianized beta males who protest are given the rope treatment, with a sign reading "I betrayed my brothers" hanging around their necks as they are hoisted into the air to hang till death.
This soon spreads beyond the camps, and into the general population, as the situation grows beyond what the military can contain. As this great saga continues, men begin to compete in tournaments of martial combat for the right to take the most attractive females. Women are traded as if they are currency.
The big societal reset has finally occurred, and the millions of whores finally got what they deserved. The patriarchy is reborn!
Their first appearance was Here Comes the Squirtle Squad. They used to run wild in a small town in Kanto stealing things, writing graffiti and causing trouble for travelers in the area. Once they were tricked by Meowth of Team Rocket, who made a deal for them to help himself, Jessie and James capture Ash's Pikachu. While chasing it, Pikachu sustained a nasty injury from a Goldeen. In order to help Pikachu recover, Ash convinced the Squirtle Squad to allow him to obtain a Super Potion; however, if he didn't return by noon the next day, they would kill Misty (in the dub, they threatened to dye her hair purple). By the time Ash returned, Team Rocket had arrived and decided to bomb the Squirtle Squad, causing a forest fire. Everyone went to find cover in the Squirtle Squad's cave, but, the leader of the Squirtle Squad was stuck on its back, forcing Ash to go back to help it. Working together with Ash, the Squirtle Squad defeated Team Rocket and put out the fire; they were given the title of "Town Fire Fighters," for their good work by Officer Jenny. However, the leader of the Squirtle Squad decided that it would rather travel with Ash; Ash's newly-acquired Squirtle wanted to repay him for saving its life by joining Ash's team. The Squirtle Squad was reunited with its leader at a later point in time when they entered a Pokémon firefighting competition in Johto. They were pitted against Team Wartortle, a group Ash's Squirtle had encountered in the Orange Islands. Squirtle decided to rejoin the Squad and has been with them ever since, with the exception of the Silver Conference and the final battle with Brandon. The Squirtle Squad, including Ash's Squirtle, appeared in Of Meowth and Pokémon (Part 2). Three of the members ambushed Smoochum and attacked her with a Water Gun, sending her flying. The members of the Squirtle Squad minus Ash's Squirtle also appeared in Pichu Bros. in Party Panic helping Meowth set up his party.
Seriously, they are just a couple of sacks of meat. Why the fuck do men go crazy about them? It makes no fucking sense. I am not a fucking child; I have no need for breast milk. Surely this has to be a mass dick waving contest or something, where very guy has t try to profess his love of tits more than everyone else or be called gay.
Well I'm going to break this cycle. I am no fag and I like tits perky and small, or if not that, then flat. Not a fucking pair of exploding masses of fat smashed together.
HAHAHAHAHAHA. Go talk to anyone who actually works in the programming industry who the vast majority of wizard books are targeted for. Guess who they will say? Children and young teens.
>>Go to America you will see grownups with SICP ringtones, and anything SICP you will see for yourself
Bullshit.
You knights who are still under this impression that SICP is mainstream (which it isn't outside of things like MIT) and is the same as satorization you really need to read this: http://www.thinkartlab.com/pkl/media/SUSHIS_LOGICS.pdf
In the end, SICP is not read by everyone in america. It is not mainstream. Thinking in C++ on the other hand is mainstream within the american society.
I believe that most heterosexual intercourse i.e. PIV or penis in vagina sex, under patriarchy, is effectively rape. This sounds a controversial and extreme position. However, it perhaps appears less so when we consider the evidence.
Most women are educated into the idea that sex with a man = PIV. So sex without Penis in Vagina, is not full sex or not really sex. I, along with many women, was taught that I could choose whether or not to have sex with a man, but if I did, that would involve PIV.
I was taught that sex = PIV, through sex education classes, Hollywood films and the idea of virginity. All 3 present PIV as real sex, and everything else as foreplay or extras.
In addition, we have the existence of compulsory heterosexuality. This phrase describes how all of us are educated, forced or cajoled as children and teenagers into being heterosexual. At the extreme end there is forced marriage and child brides. But even when we think we have chosen heterosexuality, the reality is that our whole upbringing constantly told us as girls that we are heterosexual and that we will have a relationship with a man.
This is done by asking us as young girls if we have a boyfriend in a teasing manner, our mothers giving us advice about boyfriends before we are dating, books and films aimed at children where a girl or woman has a boyfriend, playing at weddings, etc. Girls are constantly told they are heterosexual and that they will have boyfriends.
So as women we have been often been educated or cajoled into being heterosexual. We are taught that we must have a male partner. And when we have, we are told that if we want sex, we must have PIV.
So can women really be said to consent under patriarchy to PIV sex? And if they don’t meaningfully consent, would you call that rape?
He was invited by the "smart kids" to hang out at some kids house whose liberal parents had left for the weekend.
My brother, always a moral and thoughtful individual, wanted to attend because it was one of those massive house parties that he'd never been to.
Well, as was later recalled by some of his friends at the party, he was pressured into reading SICP. He ended up doing the entire set of problem exercises.
Not long after he went into convulsions and started foaming at the mouth. The people at the party held back calling 9/11 for almost 10 minutes.
When the paramedics finally arrived they could do nothing to save him.
The autopsy revealed he had 3 times the lethal dosage of the (eval) in his blood.
But I'm sure everyone here will deny my story and the fact that my brother died after reading that illegal textbook.
"Does master want Suiseiseki to give him a footrub-desu?" she purred. "No thank you," I said. "I'm rather tired. You should retire to your box." "But master-sama, Suiseiseki doesn't like her box-desu! I want to sleep in master-sama's bed-desu!" "Not tonight. You'll do as you're told." "Why doesn't master-sama have real girls in his bed?" "What?!" "Is master-sama's penis too small for real girls?" "Why aren't you saying desu?" "Does he have to use dolls instead?" "SAY DESU! SUISEISEKI FINISHES HER SENTENCES WITH DESU!" "Master-sama showed Suiseiseki his penis once." "DESU! MASTER-SAMA SHOWED SUISEISEKI HIS PENIS ONCE DESU!" "It was too small even for dolls." "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! YOU'RE NOT SUISEISEKI!"
With my right hand I snatched a pair of scissors from my desk and mashed them continually into her face. Her little body was smashed into kindling but I did not stop. Until her screams began to sound a bit like my voice, and I remembered that dolls did not scream, and they did not bleed. Suddenly there was feeling in my left hand for the first time in weeks. I lifted it out of the doll's wreckage, covered in splinters and dripping from scissored wounds. How long had my hand been inside there? How long had I been inside here, alone in my one-room apartment, talking to myself, going mad?
The bolt scraped rust from the latch as I stepped outside. My eyes hurt, god the horizon ... it was a deal larger than 19 inches diagonally. But after five steps my breath quickened and my chest tightened and I turned back. Enough for today. Tomorrow I would try for six. A distant memory told me that when I reached two hundred and eighty, I would make it to the bus stop. And then I'd be free of this apartment, of this prison. And then there'd be nowhere in the world I couldn't go.
Least of all the refunds counter at Moemart in Akihabara. For fuck's sake. Suiseiseki finishes her sentences with desu.
Ubuntu £inux is making America go broke. Ubuntu's philosophy of openness is a lie because they steal your information and sell it to the Amazon and NSA agents who use it to profile you. To what end nobody knows. Microsoft has tried to prevent Ubuntu from creating the first serious monopoly in computing history but anti trust laws have proven noneffective against the Ubuntu juggernaut. It won't be long until the Canonical tax drives the cost of computers through the roof so only the rich can afford one. Did you know that Ubuntu can't run the hit release Aliens: Colonial Marines? This is a serious offense because Ubuntu could kill the video game industry causing millions to lose jobs. All that in the name of communism. Rest assured that Canonical is no hippie paradise: their phones will contain black ops NSA tracking ribbons that can geolocate you without electricity anywhere in the world, the same technology used to track $20 bills. Some speculate the NSA works for Canonical, but there is no proof. But you have to ask the question.
Use SDL and C++. It's dead simple with the tools they have nowadays -- practically anyone can do it! If you can't figure it out by reading a few tutorials, then game design isn't in your blood.
I recommend starting off by downloaded the DirectX SDK, the Windows' SDK, and Microsoft's free Visual Studios Express (but if you have a school email account, you can get VS Pro for free from dreamspark). Next, download SDL and set up the library directories in VS (there are plenty of tutorials on this). Start a blank solution and then add several C++ DLL projects. You'll need one for things like AI, one for your graphics engine, one for the audio engine, one for the physics engine, one for input, one for file interactions (not necessary to be seperate, but good for abstraction), one for interface, one for internet interactions, one for dynamic world generation, etc....
After that, you need to add a plain Win32 project that will link all the there libraries that you just made together. Be sure to put the build order in proper order, or you will have circular dependencies! Microsoft puts handy comments in the code that it generates along the lines of ``Add your code here'' that are pretty hard to miss. This is where you need to add your code.
But before you do that, you need to include a bunch of files from the standard library. For starters, you'll need to be sure that Windows.h is always in your precompiled header file (named Stdafx.h) -- it's a rather long file, so you should just include it there, then include Stdafx.h from everything else. Boost and the standard template library are great ways to minimize the time you waste in tedious function about memory management, so be sure to include those in Stdafx.h and use their functionality at every opportunity as well. Be sure to look for online tutorials if you run into any trouble for this!
The next thing you need to do is to add classes to your projects. For instance, your AI project will need many different classes to manage all the different NPCs. Every NPC will have it's own object (which is a what a class is called when the program is running), which means that every NPC can be unique. You use the Add class tool in VS to add classes to projects. Your AI projects like NPC_Manager, NPC, Enemy, etc.... Within each class you add variables that the class can access. You will add numbers in the classes for things like health and text for things like names. Although you only have one class, each NPC will have it's own little copy of that class, called an object, when running. This subject is a little tricky and you will probably need help from the good people at StackOverflow to debug this.
But enough program for now -- let's talk about graphics! You can either pay several hundred dollars for a copy of PhotoShop, or you can use free programs like GIMP. The problem with GIMP is that, because it is licensed under the GPL, everything made with it is licensed under the GPL as well, which means that the image legally belongs to the GIMP project and you can never sell it. For this reason, I find it best to just buy PhotoShop. You can find plenty online about how to make images with PhotoShop.
For 3D Models, the absolute best program to use for this is Maya. It cost several thousand dollars, but it well worth it. The free alternative, Blender, not only suffers from the same licensing problem as the GIMP, but has a keyboard-only interface, making it hard to use.
It is very difficult to make proper sounds without a large sound studio. For this reason, it is probably just easier to take parts of the sound from other projects and use them. This is called `sampling' and the right to do it is protected by law. You must, however, edit it a little, or it isn't sampling, it's just copying.
I wish you luck on your journey to becoming a game designer!
rika fuurude waited. the lights above her blinked and sparked out of the air. rika was a shrine maiden for years. when she was young she watched the shrinemaidens and she said to dad "I want to be a shrine maiden, daddy". Dad said "No! You will BE KILL BY OYASHIROSAMA" There was a time shen she believed him. Then as she got oldered she stopped. But now in the shrine she knew there was oyashirosama. "This is Oyashirosama" the radio crackered. "You must fight fate!" . So rika got all her friends and beat up the yamainu. "SHE GOING TO KILL US" said the yamainu. "I will shoot at her" said Takano and she fired. Oyashirosama stopped the time and tried to blew her up. But then the scene switched and Takano was not able to kill Rika. Takano shouted "No! I must kill the loli!" Rika said "No, Takano. You are the loli" And then Takano was a delicious loli
I'm thinking about going to Gensokyo tomorrow. It's bad enough having multiple mental disorders, but when your own dad tells you that you're too pathetic to enter a mental ward because you will never get a job to make enough money to pay for it (combined with all the other crap I've been dealing with) and is dropping me off at a homeless shelter tomorrow morning, it's pretty much a done deal. I know /jp/ is mostly normalfags pretending to be autists, but I also know there are some legit autists here that might have had similar problems themselves. I was thinking as a last resort, I'd call a suicide hotline right before it, but I'm not so sure if they can help. My biggest concern about going into a mental ward is the sheer cost of it and the quickness that I have to pay for it. I don't mind racking up $20,000 in costs if it helps me, but what's the point if I'm released and just out on the street jobless, like when I got in?
This is /prog/, so I'm not expecting much help (inb4 404 in minutes), but I figured it would be worth a shot. I thought I read something a while back about a form you could fill out that might have the government pay for some of it, but I have no idea what the qualifications are for that.
You can't parse [X]HTML with regex. Because HTML can't be parsed by regex. Regex is not a tool that can be used to correctly parse HTML. As I have answered in HTML-and-regex questions here so many times before, the use of regex will not allow you to consume HTML. Regular expressions are a tool that is insufficiently sophisticated to understand the constructs employed by HTML. HTML is not a regular language and hence cannot be parsed by regular expressions. Regex queries are not equipped to break down HTML into its meaningful parts. so many times but it is not getting to me. Even enhanced irregular regular expressions as used by Perl are not up to the task of parsing HTML. You will never make me crack. HTML is a language of sufficient complexity that it cannot be parsed by regular expressions. Even Jon Skeet cannot parse HTML using regular expressions. Every time you attempt to parse HTML with regular expressions, the unholy child weeps the blood of virgins, and Russian hackers pwn your webapp. Parsing HTML with regex summons tainted souls into the realm of the living. HTML and regex go together like love, marriage, and ritual infanticide. The <center> cannot hold it is too late. The force of regex and HTML together in the same conceptual space will destroy your mind like so much watery putty. If you parse HTML with regex you are giving in to Them and their blasphemous ways which doom us all to inhuman toil for the One whose Name cannot be expressed in the Basic Multilingual Plane, he comes. HTML-plus-regexp will liquify the nerves of the sentient whilst you observe, your psyche withering in the onslaught of horror. Rege̿̔̉x-based HTML parsers are the cancer that is killing StackOverflow it is too late it is too late we cannot be saved the trangession of a chi͡ld ensures regex will consume all living tissue (except for HTML which it cannot, as previously prophesied) dear lord help us how can anyone survive this scourge using regex to parse HTML has doomed humanity to an eternity of dread torture and security holes using regex as a tool to process HTML establishes a breach between this world and the dread realm of c͒ͪo͛ͫrrupt entities (like SGML entities, but more corrupt) a mere glimpse of the world of regex parsers for HTML will instantly transport a programmer's consciousness into a world of ceaseless screaming, he comes̶,̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶p̶e̶s̶t̶i̶l̶e̶n̶t̶ ̶s̶l̶ithy regex-infection will devour your HTML parser, application and existence for all time like Visual Basic only worse he comes he comes do not fight he com̡e̶s, ̕h̵is un̨ho͞ly radiańcé destro҉ying all enli̍̈́̂̈́ghtenment, HTML tags lea͠ki̧n͘g fr̶ǫm ̡yo͟ur eye͢s̸ ̛l̕ik͏e liquid pain, the song of re̸gular expression parsing will extinguish the voices of mortal man from the sphere I can see it can you see ̲͚̖͔̙î̩́t̲͎̩̱͔́̋̀ it is beautiful the final snuffing of the lies of Man ALL IS LOŚ͖̩͇̗̪̏̈́T ALL IS LOST the pon̷y he comes he c̶̮ome̶s̶ ̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶e̶s̶ the ichor permeates all MY FACE MY FACE ᵒh god no NO NOO̼OO NΘ stop the an*̶͑̾̾̅ͫ͏̙̤g͇̫͛͆̾ͫ̑͆l͖͉̗̩̳̟̍ͫͥͨe̠̅s ͎a̧͈͖r̽̾̈́͒͑e not rè̑ͧ̌aͨl̘̝̙̃ͤ͂̾̆ ZA̡͊͠͝LGΌ ISͮ̂҉̯͈͕̹̘̱ TO͇̹̺ͅƝ̴ȳ̳ TH̘Ë͖́̉ ͠P̯͍̭O̚N̐Y̡ H̸̡̪̯ͨ͊̽̅̾̎Ȩ̬̩̾͛ͪ̈́̀́͘ ̶̧̨̱̹̭̯ͧ̾ͬC̷̙̲̝͖ͭ̏ͥͮ͟Oͮ͏̮̪̝͍M̲̖͊̒ͪͩͬ̚̚͜Ȇ̴̟̟͙̞ͩ͌͝S̨̥̫͎̭ͯ̿̔̀ͅ
I love it when people equate a shitpost on their favorite website as just spam or an annoyance.
A shitposter is like a burglar. You hear of burglars? Yes, of course you have. Because you've been on the internet.
But instead of stealing your shit, he brings shit to your house. Actual shit. You don't want that shit in there. So you COULD try to get rid of the burglar, and the shit he left in your house. OR. You could put some newspaper on it and forget about it.
That is the house equivalent of the gmail equivalent of the "hide button" or "filter" on 4chan. Yes, the shit is still there. It's still sitting on your carpet.
Serious question time and I want you to answer: Do you sperg to Google about how "OMG Y DU PPL CARE IF POOP IS EVRYWER" or do you just shrug and accept it as part of life that shit exists on your floor, shitposters gonna shitpost, and all you can really do is shrug and realize that you don't care enough about your house or life to do anything about it?
The first anime I ever saw was "Revolutionary Girl Utena" the movie. I was attracted to it because it was bizarre and new. It hit me at a vulnerable time; my father and mother had just been murdered. I became obsessed with the "emptiness inside" theme of the movie, and felt that this related to my life somehow. I watched Evangelion next, and absolutely loved the depressing feeling both of these shows left me with. I am a person who loves depressions; I feel that I am at my most creative and "raw" when utterly depressed. The empty feeling these shows gave me filled me with emotions I wanted to recapture.
Like an addict seeking another hit, I kept downloading more and more programs, watching tons of shows. At one point, I had two shoeboxes full of CD-r's packed with Anime programs. I had a library of just about every show ever made. I became obsessive, but I wasn't finding that feeling that was originally there. Sure, I could recapture it with great stuff like Serial Experiments: Lain and Millenium actress, but that was only for a moment.
Eventually, I stopped watching the shows I was downloading, but just grabbed them for the sake of having them. I had to have more. I bought DVD's and didn't watch them. Gradually, over time, I felt my aesthetic become warped. What once was strange and bizarre looking character design became familiar; I sought it out. If I caught a glimpse of an anime style character in real life, I felt a rush; almost as if my hindbrain saw it before I was aware of it. I was visiting a Japanese tea Garden and saw real life schoolgirls in the familiar navy blue fuku uniforms. I was fascinated by them; I was drawn, attracted, but not in a sexual way; it blew my mind to see something in real life that I had before seen only in the abstract.
A familiar feeling came through me when I saw them. I felt the same at that moment as when I had first seen Utena, when I had first finished Evangelion. My obsession took a new direction.
I bought several sailor fuku uniforms from online retailers. J-list was too expensive and didn't sell in the size I desired. I had to have the legitimate stuff. At first it was satisfying to just look at the uniforms. I would keep them clean, iron them, and hang them up every day. The ritual was soothing to me.
Sooner or later I had to do it. I had to wear the uniforms I had treasured. I am proud to report that it took me a few months to break down, to really cross the threshold into utter depravity. After that line had been crossed, though, there was no going back. Tentatively, I started by simply wearing the uniforms around the house. I would wake up very early, before anyone could glimpse at me from outside on the street, and simply do my cleaning and cooking wearing the various uniforms I purchased. I got a matching apron. I would pretend I was getting ready for Japanese High school.
Soon, though, wearing the uniform in private was not enough. I purchased a duster trenchcoat and began walking through town wearing my outfit. Nobody knew, and this made me comfortable. But, again, this soon became insufficient to satisfy my obsession.
I began stalking this girl I knew, Sarah. I checked out her routines; when she left for work, when she got back, what time she went to bed. At first I furtively ventured into her place with my uniform under my trench coat while she was away. I knew where her spare key was because I had helped her move earlier. Speaking of this, I'm a pretty beefy guy. I weigh around 240-260 pounds, but I'm not that tall. A great friend to have if you need to move.
Anyway, gradually, I became more comfortable in her apartment. I started doing stuff like rolling around in her bed, stealing her underwear and putting it in little plastic bags, soforth. As you would expect, I became more and more comfortable doing this, and crossed a line. She came home unexpectedly one day, early from work. Panicked, I hid under the bed in my uniform. Immediately, as she came through the door, she spotted my trench coat. Lying under her bed, the sound of my heavy breathing seemed a thousand times louder than it actually was. I could hear her rooting through the trench coat, and could hear the wrinkling of celophane as she found my empty plastic bags. Thank god they didn't yet have her used underwear in them.
I put my sweaty, meaty hands together and prayed.
I heard her walking around the apartment. Thankfully, she didn't bring anyone with her. My mind was flashing; the excitement had triggered my epilepsy. Suddenly, I was barraged with memories from my first anime program, revolutionary girl utena. I heard her walking around some more, and then sit down on the bed. I saw her clothes come off and hit the floor in front of me. During this time I was controlling myself and having a minor epileptic fit. I could see transformation sequences from anime programs I had watched. It was all coming together; the near hallucinations, the girl in the bed above me, and most of all, my sweaty fuku uniform.
She approached the bathroom and got into the shower. She turned on the water. I was convinced that this was the one moment I had been searching for. This was my chance to cross over into the other world described in Utena; the fabric of reality was thin. I could taste it. In many of my anime programs I had seen the seemingly normal characters, like me, enter into a world of magic and joy.
I rolled out from under the bed and bounded into the bathroom. She saw my large form approaching through the glass of the shower and started screaming. I was having epileptic flashes; the screaming sounded just like "KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" I was having trouble walking, my steps staggered. I couldn't feel the floor. My meaty hands slammed the shower door open, but she sprayed me with a jet of water. The water triggered another fit and I seized, falling into the bath. She tripped and fell on top of me. As she was screaming and my blood filled the bath, it swirled around reality, and intermingled in my mind. Her screams, the blood, my sweat, the uniform, Japan, schoolgirls, magic, tragedy, terror, and hope all become one to me. For one moment, I could taste it. The anime reality. It was here, like a precious jewel perched between my meaty, sweaty pectorals. And then, gone.
My first time anal experience was probably the worst sexual experience of my life. I have had many instances where sex wasn’t very good or that I messed things up by shooting a bit too fast. Everyone has those things happen at times. But that anal thing will haunt my memories for the rest of my life, waking me up from a dead sleep, a pale white ghost of my former self. Now, I won’t get into all the details on just how bad it was, but I will tell you that I will never EVER do anal again after this. Just the thought of it makes me cringe and want to hide myself in a closet somewhere.
First off, the first time anal was with a girl that I knew very well. We have been going out off and on for years and thought we would give it a try sometime. I wish now that we had never agreed to any of it. In fact, I wish I could go back in time and force myself not to even bring it up with her again. I can’t put into words just how horrifying it was to even attempt what we did. But I have moved forward on this subject, now haven’t I?
Anyway, to make a very long and disturbing story a bit shorter, we were sitting around watching some movies at my place when I decided I would ask her if she had done anal before. I was very interested in my first time anal experience and was kind of hoping that she had done it before so she could explain to me what to do to make it feel the best it could feel. She was very interested in what I was asking and got overly excited when I started to mention anal with her. I thought this was a very good reaction so I kept going with it.
Now, I won’t go into great detail here but her idea for my first time anal wasn’t exactly what I had in mind. In fact, if I had known what her idea was before it happened we probably wouldn’t have discussed it any further. Needless to say, my first time will be my last and there is no way in hell I will EVER trust another girl behind me with anything that even resembles a strap on or dildo of any kind and that does include fruit and veggies too!
The black-white pleaded to the rainbow magician; while battling the forceful urge within her, Marisa begged again. With tears in her eyes, her actions were simply ignored by an apathetic Alice; sitting not even five feet away and reading a book, peering out the corner of her eye at the witch's struggle. Her many dolls completely restricting Marisa's movement in her time of desperation.
"You must..." the witch whined, "please, release your dolls! I can't take it much more..."
Alice remained idle and flipped a page in her book. The pressure within the Marisa grew greater with every passing second, a force that she could never prevent merely with knowledge and wit.
"I... beg of you... please..." a mixture of tears and sweat streamed from the witch's face and made its way to the magician's wooden floor.
"I... I..." with her last shred of willpower, Marisa fell to the floor. With her face down, in a shameless admit of defeat, a puddle formed from under her; the liquid passing through the thin fabric and drenched her dress within mere seconds. A smirk appeared on Alice's face as the liquid expanded on her floor and made it's way up Marisa's body; the magician placed her book down and walked passed the witch, stepping in the shallow puddle of Marisa's urine.
"I hate you... you damn bitch." With her head still facing the floor, tears multiplied in the witch's eyes and diffused with liquid she exerted moments ago. Whelps and sobs came from Marisa's mouth along with mumbles of "damn Alice..." and "I'll never forgive you."
The magician walked back into the room and tapped the witch on the shoulder; looking up, she saw Alice's hand reaching out. Knowing she couldn't continue to wallow in her piss, she picked herself up and hung her head as Alice lead her to another room.
In Alice's bedroom with the door shut behind them, the magician began to remove the soiled dress of the witch; however, she was met with a forceful hand.
"What are you doing ze~? I don't need your help," muddled Marisa with the slightest hint of red in her cheek. "I can do this myself. Also, what are those things..." she pointed to her bed. Alice picked up one of the white objects; "those can't be..." the magician nodded.
Marisa signed with a hint of disgust, "You get weirder everyday, doll freak..." A thought occurred. "Hey, wait, why do you even have those things?" Hesitant, Alice lifted her skirt and revealed that she herself was wearing a diaper. Despite the humility that bestowed onto Marisa minutes ago, a smile came to her face. "So it is true, you do lea..."
Alice forcefully grunted and a trio of dolls surrounded the witch. One quickly flew behind Marisa and untied her apron and the other two grabbed the straps of her dress and lifted it over her head; the dolls then flew off with the garments. Before the black-white had a chance to fight it, she stood in Alice's bedroom with nothing but her shirt and soaked bloomers.
Alice, face redden, placed her hand on the witch's shoulders and led her to her bed. Marisa, unsure of what she should do, was forcefully seated on the edge and pushed back by the doll otaku.
Alice excitingly placed her fingers on the witch's waist; as she was about to pull down her bloomers, the magician was met with Marisa's grasp.
"No, ze~. Don't you dare do that." Just then, a group of dolls flew onto Marisa and restrained her arms and legs once again. "Dammit, ze~; let me go!" Alice ignored the demand and pulled down the wet bloomers. Staring at what was now exposed, trickles of blood dripped from the magician's nose.
"You sad, lonely freak." Marisa remarked as it was all she could do. Wiping the drippings of passion from her face, she slid the diaper under Marisa. Sprinkling a blot of powder onto the area, she quickly taped the garment into position before she fainted from blood loss.
Regaining her composure, Alice witnessed what she had accomplished and let out a delightful smile. Flushed with redness, she placed her face next to Marisa's and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. Then with a soft giggle, she slowly walked toward the door.
"I'll make some tea and cakes." The dollmaster opened the door and exited the room; her minions release their grasp on the witch and followed.
Marisa sat up, hearing the unfamiliar crinkle as Alice's success, and pondered what the magician really meant to her.
Suddenly, a huge black snake head with retarded-looking eyes materialized in front of them, and in a loud booming hiss, asked "Have you read your SICP today?"
The surroundings faded into blackness and within a few moments the group found themselves seated in a lecture hall at MIT, amongst several dozen other students. "Welcome to 6.001" was written on the blackboard, and Professor Gerald Jay Sussman walked into the room, dressed in his robe and wizard hat.
"Is this a hack?" he asked as he glanced around and saw the witch, the magician, Alice, and Marisa.
"What...?" Marisa managed to say, all of the confused by what had just happened.
"Nevermind, let's start the lecture." The Sussman said softly.
"I'd like to welcome you to this course on computer science. ... Actually, it's a terrible way to start. Computer science is a terrible name for this business. First of all it's not a science." The Sussman lectured while the students sat and listened attentively.
"What's going on?" Alice whispered to Marisa.
"I have no idea. But this is getting interesting."
"Or we'll actually see that computer... so-called science actually has a lot in common with magic." The Sussman continued.
"So procedures are the spells if you like that control these magical spirits that are the processes."
The Sussman produced a wand and waved it in the air, muttering to himself. A bright flash of light filled the room, and a stream of glowing parentheses shot out the end of the wand, dissappearing into the air. The students applauded loudly.
"But... how can he do that? He's only a human, right?" the witch whispered.
The Sussman, who up until now had paid no attention to the group, turned and stared at the witch with an astonished expression.
"What did you just say?" he asked, pointing his wand at the witch.
All of the other students turned in the direction of the group.
"Nothing," she answered quietly.
"I hope so," The Sussman said in stern tone, ending his pointing with the wand.
"And... well I guess you know everyone needs a magical language and sorcerers, right, real sorcerers use ancient Arcadian, or Sumerian, or Babylonian or whatever. We're gonna control our spirits in a magical language called LISP, which is a language designed for talking about... for casting the spells that are procedures to direct the processes," the Sussman continued, waving his wand around as he spoke.
"What a disappointment. I thought he was going to teach us magic," Marisa muttered almost inaudibly.
Once again, the Sussman quickly turned and stared at her, pointing with his wand.
"Excuse me?" he asked, "What did you say again?"
"Nothing," she replied, trying to avoid attention.
"No, I'm pretty sure you said something. Please repeat it for us, so as not to miss a fine learning opportunity."
"She said, 'What a disappointment. I thought he was going to teach us magic'," the witch exclaimed. At the sound of those words the Sussman's face turned a bright red.
"HOW DARE YOU DOUBT ME!!" The Sussman shouted angrily. "By the power of the Y combinator I send thee to the land of Java!"
The Sussman raised his wand and a pointed it at the group, sending from its blunt point a stream of red parentheses. Almost immediately Alice sent forth her dolls, which collided with the parentheses at 61.8034% of their way toward her, creating a blindingly bright blue ball of plasma. The other students watched in amazement as the parentheses slowly ate their way through the doll-storm towards Alice.
With the 12 volumes I have on hand and the three volumes there, that's a total of 15 volumes combined. I have no doubt that this is a set of 15 volumes. The shikigami of the outside world are the same as the ones in Gensokyo after all. With computers, F represents 15 and F is the state wherein everything is compounded. It was written that when everything becomes F, the highest value is held.
I think that it's natural for 15 to have power. Even in ancient times, 15 meant perfection in this country. The same reason the full moon is also known as the fifteenth night. Computers must be familiars that have resulted from the ideas of the East and the beauty of the moon.
Marisa asked me what I was thinking about as she lined up the three books.
Through Marisa's nonchalant actions, I realized something else. The numbers on the books, "13", "14", and "15", when lined up, makes 131415. If the 1 in front is removed... it then depicts the number that represents a perfect circle, 3.1415. This also means a full moon. And thus my theory that the familiars of the outside world use the power of the moon becomes truth.
Drug test them, then run a criminal background check. Make sure they don't own any guns so they can't shoot up the place. Give them a polygraph and make sure that they don't plan to steal your intellectual property. Have them examined by a doctor so that your company can save money on insurance (if you offer it, if not, then do it anyway so they don't just keel over and die in the middle of a project). Ask to see their browsing history on a regular basis so that you know they don't go on 4chan\world4ch. Don't hire anyone with a spouse or children, to insure that they can always be ready for overtime. Ask them what they expect to be paid: if it is lower than average then they are not confident and likely incompetent; if they ask for higher than average, then they are arrogant and expect too much. Double check their history to make sure that they don't make sexist or racist jokes. Look on their facebook to find out if they are the antisocial type. Time them on how long it take them to read the employment contract: if it takes too long, then they don't need the work bad enough and will leave soon, messing up the company's plans for them; if they don't take enough time then they are careless and easily fool, meaning they will likely mess up when dealing with customers. If they don't have a bachelor's degree, then instantly reject them. If they don't have a few years experience (even if it's only an intern position), then instantly reject them. If they ever went to a junior college, or an online college, then instantly reject them. If they ever went to any sort of "vocational" program, instantly reject them. If they have any certificates that aren't backed up by real experience, instantly reject them. If they didn't have at least a 3.5 GPA, instantly reject them. Don't hire people with too many jobs on their resume, it shows that they move around too much and can't be trusted. Don't hire people with too few jobs on their resume, it shows that they don't know how to adapt to new corporate cultures. Don't hire programmers over 35, because they have trouble adapting to new technologies. Don't hire anyone under 25, because they are just children and cannot act responsibly or be respected by customers. Don't hire anyone with gaps in their employment history, as it shows that they are lazy and don't need the job, and might quit at any time. Don't hire anyone looking for a job while still employed, as they have shown themselves to be disloyal to their current company. Don't hire anyone who don't seem to be team players, as they will not demand the respect of customers or coworkers. Don't hire anyone who asks about career advancement, as they will neglect the job they were hired for so that they may try to find another. Ask them about their hobbies: if they answer with anything other than things that further their knowledge in programming, then instantly reject them. If they answer with anything odd (strange musics, occult, anime, Touhous, extreme sports), instantly reject them. Ask them how they feel about "open source" software and the GPL. If they are too positive, quietly show them the door, because they might steal your code and give it to an "open source" project. If they are too negative, then quietly show them the door, because it is not their job to think about what is done with the code that they write. Inform them about the NDA's that must be signed. If they take too long to formulate an answer, then they are flaky, if they don't take long enough to think about it, then they aren't taking it seriously. Inform them of the non-compete agreements and the fact that you will own any code they write for six months after employment and that they write on their personal time. If they show any resentment to this industry standard practice, reject them immediately. Run a credit check on them: if they don't have very much debt, then they will be less pressured to perform well at work; if they have too much, then they are vulnerable for bribery and other corporate espionage. Reject anyone who has a history of military service, as they are more prone to violence and intimidation, and might have mental health issues that will cause poor performance and drag the company down. Reject anyone who has been a law enforcement officer, because they will tend to misunderstand things and interpret things as illegal. Reject anyone who has a history in education, as they tend to patronizing and make their coworkers uncomfortable. Reject anyone who has citizenship in your country, because those people are more likely to be able to leave for higher wages. Reject anyone who is a minority, as they could sue the company for harassment and discrimination. Reject anyone who isn't a minority, because they lack sensitivity and could offend one of their coworkers and put the company in a compromising position.
Mother and father got a little tired from seizing Palestine from the Arabs, so they want to go to Tel Aviv to buy some kosher vodka for Purim. They call their most trusted Arab babysitter. When the Arab babysitter arrives, children already run around house yelling. Arab babysitter just sits around and make sure everything usual with children. Later that night, Arab babysitter gets bored and goes to read Talmud, but she can’t read it downstairs because she is illiterate (the parents didn’t want the dirty Arab bitch to know their jew secrets). So, she calls them and asks if she can get noisy jew children to read Talmud by themselves in their room so they will be quiet. Of course, the parents say it’s okay, but the Arab babysitter has one final request… she asked if she could cover up the gold outside the bedroom window with a blanket or cloth, because it maeks her nervous. The phone line is silent for a moment, and the father who says, "Take the children and get out of the house… we will call Israeli army. We do not have a gold."(of course he lied) The Israeli army found all three of the house occupants dead because Mossad killed them for looking to have jew gold. And Israeli army shot parents on sight for financing Arab terrorist. Such is life in Haifa.
Even your text when viewed as a block looks stupid. I can just imagine the stupid as a bubbling black molasses oozing through the little crevices that the spaces form, right down to the reply box where I write my stupid post to inform you on how stupid you are. I don't even need to read what you wrote, beyond the words that my brain automatically picks up while moving my eyes from your name to the post form. It's stupid. You're stupid. Pure, unadulterated stupid. Infecting everything it touches.
I read this book in 10 sittings. In all honesty, it took me that long to understand material that came in chapter 3 and later. And I'm no novice. I've been programming for 10 years now, having done everything from compilers to database systems. I have never seen a worse book in my life. It is as if the authors are not trying to teach anything but are merely writing for glory and self gratification. I got the book in February based on some good comments on this page, and now I see that those people either had learning support in school, or they simply skimmed it and now have an illusion of having learned something profound. I certainly don't think the ideas here are of any practical value, and if they are (very few in this book) they have been known to all for a long time now. The first two chapters are a waste of space, and the rest are a waste of everyone's time. It is obvious this book was written to fill some dubious requirement at MIT and now other copycat colleges use it as well. I just feel sorry for the students who have to go through it all. At least I was able to return the book at will, having learned absolutely nothing.
When the singularity happens (still waiting, Kurzweil and Kaku), I'm going simulate my own private universe where I am a cute little witch and wear cute Touhou dresses, but everyone else is normal. I'll give them hope, then crush their dreams right in front of them, keeping them in perpetual misery. I'll curse them with ambitions, but make those ambitions impossible to fulfill. I'll give them a good life, then smash them right in the middle, just to give them a taste of the happiness that they never have. I'll delude them into thinking that they are free, then reveal to them that they are only my slaves. I'll torture and kill them, just to resurrect them and do it again, until their mind is completely broken and there is no shreds of a human left in them, then discard them and move on to the next victim. I'll make Hell, and condemn those who resent my evil ways to eternal agony. I'll teach them concepts of justice just sneer in their faces as they try to reconcile my words with my actions. I'll reward those who emulate me with riches and power, and punish those who don't with starvation, sickness, and the death of those around them. I'll make them toil for their entire lives to build monuments to my vanity. I'll give them brief reprieves of love and contentment, then kill off everything they loved and leave them wondering what they did wrong.
This will be a very fun and very intellectual game -- I am very much looking forward to it.
After a few hours I've only gotten to >>135. This is going to take a while.
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Anonymous2015-06-16 15:38
What is this SJW thing about?
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Anonymous2015-06-16 15:46
Ruby - Sailor Jupiter. A tall tomboy who a bit clumsy. She is actually quite girly, but is embarrassed to admit this to anyone. Her dreams include being a good wife one day, but she is socially awkward and has had her heart broken before, so she is hesitant about romance again.
Girls should be married when they're children. Thus no hearts would be broken.
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Anonymous2015-06-16 15:50
LISP - Sailor Mercury. The intellectual of the group. She is smart and shy, and though everyone who knows her loves her, she has trouble making new friends. She can perform math that completely bypasses logic and can throw out a line of completely unintelligible nonsense to prove that she is right. She didn't have any offensive attacks for a long time, so her popularity suffered as she was deemed useless. This soon changed and she was given powers on par with the rest of the sailors, but some people never forgave her.
Cute.
Perl - Sailor Saturn. She is a frail girl, the daughter of a mad scientist who sold his soul to the devil for a chance to have a loli of his own. Because she is inhabited by the devil, two lesbians want to kill her, but Sailor Moon saves her and tells them to fuck off. Her powers are limited to either being useless or destroying an entire planet, killing herself in the process. She is good friends with Chibiusa.
>>32 I think you'll get your ass sued. This time by both feminists and creationists, who believe God needs more kids.
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Anonymous2015-06-16 23:04
Do you think Rozen ever fucked Shinku?
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Anonymous2015-06-17 0:00
Why admin got so mad at some Georgian Jew (Mikhail Kvaratskhelia is a Jewish name) making a game with Quake engine? I guess admin is Russian, because Russians hate Jews and Georgians (even had a war with them in 2008).
Nope! I'm a fellow user, just like you--I'm just pointing and laughing at the guy who thinks quality of ``contribution'' dictates value as a poster while proceeding to post garbage like that as a shining example of ``contribution''. Keep up the psychotic free-association though, we love it here on /r/programming!
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Anonymous2015-06-17 2:07
>>196 Everything is a garbage, compared to good old NES games.
Why admin got so mad at some Georgian Jew (Mikhail Kvaratskhelia is a Jewish name) making a game with Quake engine? I guess admin is Russian, because Russians hate Jews and Georgians (even had a war with them in 2008).
Admin is faggot.
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Anonymous2015-06-17 3:44
>>195,199 >>1-chan, don't try to recover from this. Your thread, which no one liked, has been ruined with a kopipe flood and shitposting, and everyone knows that it was you keeping it bumped in the first place. Trying to launch a campaign against the administration because no one likes you hardly ever works on /prog/ nearly as well as it does on /g/ and Reddit.
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Anonymous2015-06-17 3:58
>>200 I liked his thread. I love controversial things in general. Hate infusing things are entertaining at least.
>>201 This entire thread is pathetic. >>60 and the person mentioned in >>1 are the same person (mikee). He's referring to himself in the 3rd person in >>1 to make it look like he has consensus. He's also the one posting that biblical garbage about marrying little girls, which he also doing on several other boards. It's like the crazy of tdavis and persistence of Nikita mixing together to make some sort of morbid curiosity rivaling a ten car pileup.
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Anonymous2015-06-17 5:47
>>201 Ditto, I also liked this thread and want to know more. Was sad when shit post happened.
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Anonymous2015-06-17 5:48
>>1 is not mikee. Mikee did not arrive till the 40s or 50s